Disclaimer: Hetalia belongs to me! Yeah right. For alcohol's sake, Alfred is going to be 21. Oh, and though I have a bottle- er, squirty thing- of Nasonex, I do not own it.
Arthur sat at a bar, drowning his sorrow in self pity and tequila. How many times had his wife cheated on him? Had to be at least 20, stupid women. She never approved of his bisexuality. He'd walked into his bedroom to find her naked with another bloke. Then she told him some cock and bull story about how he got her drunk and pressured her into be with him, how it wasn't her fault, it was all his fault for not being there to protect her. Like he shouldn't have been working his ass off to bring her all the money that she wastes on expensive jewelry. He had to take some time to think, but he got completely wasted instead.
"Bloody wanker stealing my woman." He muttered. "Hit me again." He set his empty tequila glass down on bar.
"Sir, that's your 5th shot. I think you should take a break." The bartender informed him. Arthur glared at him.
"Did I ask for your opinion?" He growled. The bartender backed up, frightened out of his pants.
"Sorry about that, he get's a little mean when he's drunk, I'll take him home." Arthur felt a hand land on his shoulder. He turned around. A boy looking about 19 years old with messy brown hair and crooked glasses smirked down at him.
"Aren't you a little young to be in a bar." He hissed. The boy smirked wider and pulled out a drivers license. It said that he was Alfred F. Jones and apparently he was 21 years old.
"Come on, time to go home, honey." Alfred cooed as he dragged Arthur off the chair.
"Unhand me you bloody twat!" Arthur screamed.
"You say the darnedest things." Alfred replied dragging him out.
"Let me go!" Arthur grunted, tearing an arm away from the young American. Alfred dropped the other one and Arthur tried to get up. But as sure enough, he fell to the floor, so intoxicated that he couldn't even stand. Alfred held in his laughter.
"Well you know what they say, one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor!" He joked. Arthur glared at him. "Come on." He held out his hand.
"What do you expect me to do with that." Arthur asked
"I'm being courteous." Alfred replied. "Take it, I'll have my driver take you to the hotel, you're obviously aren't from here."
"I'll have you know that I moved here three months ago!" Arthur informed the younger man.
"Then I'll just take you home. Charles knows his way around everywhere." Alfred continued.
"I'm not going back there!" Arthur blurted. Alfred raised his eyebrows.
"Then where are you staying." He asked.
"Uh...." Arthur really hadn't thought this out very well.
"Come back to my place." Alfred offered. "You can stay in one of the spare rooms."
"Ne-ugh." Arthur started to refuse, but his body caught up with him and he vomited all over the bar floor.
"I'll take that as a yes." Alfred stated, picking up the older man bridal style.
"Hey!" He exclaimed. "Put me down you Yank!"
"You can't walk on your own, and Charles is parked right outside the bar." Alfred explained. "Just bear with me until we reach the car. I promise, it'll be fine." And lo and behold, a limousine was parked right outside of the bar.
"Bloody hell." Arthur muttered, exasperated by the sight of the limo.
"Yeah, a little ostentatious for me, but daddy took away my car. He didn't seem to appreciate my little prank. Those benefits are always so boring, I thought I'd lighten the mood with a harmless prank, but those stiff business types don't appreciate a good joke. Either that or they really hate badgers. Well, one of them named Gilbert seemed to have a hell of a lot of fun poking one with a spoon..." Alfred told as he loaded Arthur into the car.
"You're very immature for a 21 year-old." Arthur commented, remembering how when he was 21, he was quite the gentleman, never pulled any silly prank.
"Well, you never had to deal with my father." Alfred laughed.
"Maybe not, but I'm glad. Mine1 wasn't the kindest man, but at least my father didn't spoil me into becoming some nasty git who preys on drunken foreigners." Arthur spat, but instead of being insulted, Alfred laughed feverishly.
"Oh, so now you're a foreigner? You said before, you've been here for 3 months, so you obviously aren't a foreigner." Alfred teased.
"Don't use my own words against me!" Arthur yelled, causing Alfred to laugh harder.
"Oh, lighten up, we all say things we regret when we're drunk. I once told a man that I was a chicken farmer from Vermont." Alfred chuckled. Arthur gave him a strange look. How did he manage to get himself in this position.
"You're very strange, you know." He thought out loud, a smile breaking out across his face.
"But you gotta love me anyway." Alfred giggled. Arthur stopped smiling. His wife had always said that whenever she did something wrong, which happened to be very often.
"Un-noong." Arthur groaned, struggling to hold back his tears. His heart ached, every time he caught her cheating, it was the same thing. 'You love me anyway, right.' He put his head in his lap.
"Hey, are you okay?" Alfred asked, worried. "Are you crying?" Tears had began to seep through Arthur's fingers.
"No!" He sniffed. "I, uh, just have allergies." Alfred rolled his eyes.
"Alright, we'll get you some Nasonex when we are inside." Alfred opened the door.
"That was quick." Arthur marveled.
"It was thirty minutes!" Alfred chuckled back. Arthur's jaw dropped, but not at how fast time flew by, but at the huge mansion in front of him. Alfred grabbed his wrist. "Let's give you the bedroom right next to mine!" he cheered.
Yaho~ It's finished un! First chapter. I really hate his wife, or as I like to call her, nameless lady number 563. Anyway, you may not have noticed, probably not, but it is an ongoing joke with my sister, totalnarutofangirl, that in all our Hetalia fics, Prussia has to poke badgers with spoons... Gotta love your family. Ja, minna.
