Chapter 1
Rain poored steadilly down, quickly soaking through her clothes, but she didnt care. Avangelique stifled a sob, kneeling next to Alyn's grave, the rain soaked ground ruining her skirt. She wrapped her arms around herself, shuddering as the memory of that day pervaded her mind.
The sound of metal against metal was deafaning, even over the shouts and cheers from all who came to watch. My heart was pounding, so afraid that something would go wrong. Alyn was always over confident when it came to his abilities, especially when he was trying to show off. I had front row seats, as his friend, to watch. That only meant that I was front row for it all. The staff, which was pitched much too high, piercing Alyn's throat, knocking him off his horse. I was front row, which meant that I reached him sooner than others. Front row, which meant that Alyn died in my arms, his blood soaking through my dress, my skin, forever staining my memories. Two hours of scrubbing would not get rid of the feeling of his blood on my skin, and I could still hear the deafaning screams that surrounded us, not realizing they were from me until they turned to sobs...
Ava shook her head hard, disloging the memories, for now was not the time to be overwhelmed. Taking a breath to steady her nerves, she layed down the wildflowers that she had gathered, giving a silent prayer. Shoulders slumped, Ava carefully stood up, shaking what mud she could from her skirt. looking around, she realized that she was alone, the other guests having left at the start of the rain. The King even seemed to be gone, giving Ava time to pay respects to his only son and heir.
Having grown up together, Alyn was like a brother to her, always coming to her aide in all situations. Most recent, he had been there when her fiance publicly humiliated her before breaking off their engagement. After breaking the jerk's nose, he had stayed by her side, dancing with her and allowing her to save face. Ava's fists clenched at the memory.
You always knew how to make me feel better. I will miss you dearly. Mother is sick though, as you know, and so I need to leave. The rain will not be good for her. Rest well. Taking a final deep breath, Ava headed away from the grave and up the hill, through the few trees that were there. Pained coughing echoed through the cemetary, causing Ava to pick up her pace.
I am sorry mother. I am coming. You should have gone home. I could have walked... Ava spotted her mother through the trees, standing next to the carrage. Thin and frain in her illness, Marion Thompson held the shawl as close to her body as she could get it, trying to force away the chill. Coughing into a hankercheif, her small body shaking with the effort to expell the sickness from her body. Ava's heart leapt into her throat, fresh tears stinging her eyes.
You have to get better. I don't know what I would do if I lost you too...
"Marion, dear, are you alright?" a male voice spoke, his tone gentle and distressed by Marion's condition. Ava's steps hitched, noticing the figure that stood not far from her mother. Tall and handsome, even in his age, the King held himself with grace and pride, though now his shoulders were hunched as he leaned closer to Marion, attempting to sheild her from some of the chill from the rain. Ava narrowed her eyes, suspitious of the Kings interest in her mother. Picking up her pace, she did a slight curtsey to the king before turning to her mother, placing her hand against her face. Ava was startled to see a pained and almost frightened look in her eyes.
"Mother, your burning up. You should have gone home. I could have walked fine. Come, lets get you home." Ava carefully turned her mother towards their carriage, her shaking worrying Ava more, ignoring the king until her mother was safely inside. " I am sorry to intrude and end your discussion, your grace, but my mother is not well, as I am sure you are now aware. I need to get her home. My deepest condolences about Aly...Prince Alyn. He was a wonderful man. " Ava's voice cracked slightly, betraying her emotion. The king gave her a kind smile, his violet eyes shimmering with unshed tears.
"You must be Ava. My son spoke fondly of you and I am sorry we had to meet under such sorrofull conditions. And I must apologize for upsetting your mother. It was not my intention. If her fever does not break by morning, please do not hesitate to send for me and I will get my doctor to look after your mother. Go take her home and make sure she warms up. I look forward to seeing you soon, my dear." The king took Ava's trembling hand in his, placing a gentle kiss, a kind smile on his face as he turned and walked towards a larger carriage, leaving Ava to stare at her hand in confusion.
What was that about? What did he mean by 'see me soon'? I have no intention of going to the palace...unless to get the doctor... shaking her head in irritation, Ava climbed into the carriage, giving the driver instructions before closing the door and sitting accross from her mother. Staring out into space, Marion had a troubled expresion on her face, the hankercheif bunched up in her tightly clenched fist. Ava looked at her mother with concern, noting her pale complection and the blood on the hankerchief that Marion tried to conceal by shoving the hankerchief into her skirt pocket. It's getting worse... tears gathered in Ava's eyes, but she quickly wiped them away, glancing out the window, her fingers clenching her skirt in agitation.
"Do you remember when you were little, and you always made up stories of the many things you would do with your life?" Ava started at her mother's voice, turning to her with concern. Marion coughed into her hand, taking a shuddering breath. "I always loved your stories. One day you were a princess with the most extravigant carriage, which you made out of books, and another day you cut up one of your old dresses to make a costume so you could be a theif, much like that hood fellow you like to read about." Marion trailed off, looking out the window with a sorrowful twinkle in her eye. Ava's eyes misted over, the worry for her mother only increasing. Clutching her mother's hands, Ava gave a small smile when she looked into her mother's eyes.
"You always encouraged my silly stories. You especially loved my stories about how Alyn and I..." Ava's voice broke, tears spilling down her cheeks. "how Alyn and I would get married and we would live together with our loved ones, raising our children together, much like how we grew up. I loved the story of living in the palace, where I would learn to ride horses and you could finally have that large flower garden that you dreamed of...but those were just stories and Alyn is gone." Ava gave her mother a gentle smile, squeezing her hands reasuringly. "Right now, we need to focus more on getting you better. Then I will focus on marrying some nice man who will help me get you that garden. We can even take flowers from it to go see Alyn." Marion remaind quiet, turning again to look out the window, a longing look in her eyes.
You will get better, Mother. You have to...I dont know what to do anymore...and I couldnt bear another funeral. I will get you that garden, I promise.
The fire burned bright and steady, successfully keeping the chill at bay. The rain continued to poor down, adding a somber atmosphere to an already sad day. Marion read in the lounge chair on the right side, facing the fire, the warmth giving her skin a glow that she had not had in years. Ava paced behind the chairs, avoiding sitting in the chair opposite her mother's. The lounge consisted of the two chairs, a small table in between, and shelves of books. Their home was modest, with only three bedrooms, the lounge, kitchen, and one living space where they could entertain guests...if they ever had any. The backyard was only big enough to house the horses and have space for them to run, and it faced woods that would lead to a lake. The house sat at the end of a road, which connected to a larger road that led into town.
Ava continued to pace, looking between her mother and the fire, willing her nurves to calm down. Marion had not said much during supper, only to request her presence in the lounge for an important discussion. That being said, Marion had yet to look up from the book she was reading, making Ava get more nervous.
What could she have to discuss with me that was so important that she could not wait until morning? Her patience wearing thin, Ava stopped in front of her mother, clearing her throat. "What can I help you with Mother? You were awful quiet during dinner and I would have thought you were retired for the night, given your condition." Ava clenched her hands to her sides, trying not to wring them in distress. Marion sighed, puting her book on the table and looked up at her daughter.
"Please sit, Ava. I have an important matter to discuss with you, and it is not something that is easy for me to talk about." For the first time in months, Marion's eyes were sharp as they regarded her daughter, who sat in the chair, her eyes reflecting the same anxiety she felt. Sighing, Marion stealed herself for what was ahead.
"you remember how I told you that your father was a tradesman, to whome I fell in love and had you, and then lost him at sea during a voyage to the kingdom in the mountains?" Ava, unable to speak past the lump in her throat, nodded. "Well, that was a lie. Now, Ava dear, what I have to tell you is very important, so listen very carefully." Marion took a deep breath, gathering stregnth. "I grew up in a small village not too far from here. When I became of marrying age, I began working in my parent's Inn and tavern, their hope being that I would catch the eye of a traveling duke or earl and get married." Marion coughed deeply, her breathing becoming labored. Ava jumped up, running out of the room and down the hall to fetch some water from the kitchen. Handing the glass to her mother, Ava sat down in the chair again, waiting for her mother to continue her story.
She never talks about dad...why now? Ava clenched her hands in her lap, waiting for what was to come. Marion took a deep breath, hands clenching around the glass in her hand. "it was a cold night, much like this one. I was cleaning tables in the tavern since it was pretty empty, only two older men sitting at the bar, drowning their sorrows. A group of men came in, laughing and shoving chairs aside, making a mess of the tavern that I had just cleaned up. oafs, the lot of them. One of the men stuck out to me, he was so handsome. He was tall, a good head taller than I. His dark hair was pulled back and he had such beautiful eyes..." Marion's eyes looked into Ava's for a moment, briefly, before looking towards the fire.
" He was just as loud as the rest, but I could not take my eyes off of him. I was so young, and I had never seen a man so handsome before. I was instantly smitten, but he was so kind I felt myself in love. My eldest sister joined me a short time later, there to take over so that I could go to sleep. I did not leave alone, though I had to sneak that handsome man upstairs..."
"Mother!" Ava's cheeks flamed at what her mother was discussing. "such things should not be discussed..ever." Marion gave her daughter a smile, her eyes full of mirth. "My dear, if that bothered you than I shall refrain from discussing what happened in that room." Marion laughed at the look of mortification on Ava's face. The light atmosphere disipated when Marion's laughter turned into coughing, her whole body convulsing. Ava jumped up, running her hands over her mother's back. Marion waved her off, drinking the water and breathing deeply. Ava kneeled by her mother, concern etched in every line of her body.
"I am fine, sweetling, now where was I...Oh yes, the morning after an amazing night. I woke up the next morning feeling higher than a kite. But my kind gentleman from that night had left, as had his whole group. All he left me was a bag of gold..." Marion reached into the book she had been reading, pulling out a faded piece of parchment. Taking a deep breath, Marion handed it to Ava. "..and this note. Read it my dear." Marion took several deep breaths, her anxiety rising as Ava began to read.
My dearest Marion,
I sincerely apologize for my behavior last night. As a married man, I take my vows very seriously. Please take no offense at the gold, but I hope it will be sufficient for a dowery, now that you are truely a woman, and a remarkable one at that. If you have any need, please send for me.
dearest regards,
James Atkinson
Ava's brow furrowed in confusion, looking up into her mothers solmn expression. "Who was this man? Is he my father? What does he have to do with us now?" Marion's expression was sad, and sympathetic, as she regarded her daughter. Taking a deep breath, Marion stealed herself for what was to come.
"Yes, this man is your father. A couple of months had gone by since that night, and I had realized that I was pregnant, with you, and knew that I needed help. I brought this up with my parents, and they said that no bastard child was going to live under their roof. Luckily for us, I still had all the money the king left. With that, I rented a carriage that brought us here. I rented rooms from kind people until I landed the teaching job, and, well, you know the rest."
"I dont understand, what does this have to do with us now? Did he try to talk to you?" Ava's hands clenched, a sick feeling curling in her stomach. Marion, a tear streaming down her cheek, looked into Ava's eyes.
"you might know him as King James Atkinson, Alyn's father." Ice froze in Ava's veins, the letter dropping from her hands.
My god no... Ava shook her head furiously, standing up and away from her mother, tears streaming down her face, her body shaking with barely contained sobs. "So this whole time Alyn was... I am..." Ava struggled to breath, histaria threatening to over come her. Nerves shot over Alyn's death, her engagement ending, and her mother's health declining, Ava was shaking so bad she looked like she was about to fall apart. Anger boiled in her belly, Ava turned furiously at her mother. "Why did you never say anything?! And why bring this up now?" Ava stared down her mother, for a moment, not caring how distressing this was for Marion. Coughing over her tears, Marion looked up, startled at the ferosity in Ava's voice.
"Your relationship with Alyn never developed beyond friendship, at least on your part. And I did not want to lose you...If you knew, your friendship with Alyn would have been ruined and the King would have gotten involved, which meant that I would have lost you. I planned on taking this to the grave, but all things considered, I no longer get to make that choice. Ava, please, I just wanted us to be happy." Marion's sobs turned into a coughing fit, her distress causing her to lose control. Ava stared at her mother, not believing what she was hearing.
On my part? What does that mean? Princess or not, I would never, could never, leave her, especially in her current condition. And what does she mean by all things considered? Marion's coughing had subsided, for the time being. Ava narrowed her eyes at her mother. "Why bring this up now? What did you mean by 'all things considered'?" A thought occured to Ava at that moment, all the blood draining from her face. "Is this what you were talking to the King about? Does he know? What does that mean for me?" Marion looked sadly at her daughter, nodding slightly.
"The king noticed your eyes. They are very unique after all. So, while giving you space to grieve, he confronted me about it. Considering he needs an heir, I could not lie to him. These are dire times, my dear Ava. Without an heir, the kingdom falls into his nephew's hands, your cousin's hands. That would be the end for our beloved kingdom. As queen, you would do what is right and would save this kingdom. Due to the need, I would be selfish if I did not tell the King the truth. The choice has been taken away from me, from us." Ava swooned slightly, catching herself on the back of the chair opposite her mother. Her heart was pounding so hard it might burst out of her chest.
Queen!? This is too much, I can't handle this. "We have one week to settle your affairs here before you will be excorted to the palace. There your new life begins." Marion's voice was quiet, the tension in the air crackling along side the fire.
"So that's it then? I get whisked away to a palace and leave you to die alone? Don't I get any say in this?" Ava's voice rose as she spoke, cracking at the end. Marion gave Ava a small smile. "Ava, dear, I want you to have the best life possible. With me dying like I am, it was only a matter of time before you would be alone, struggling to find a husband and struggling to make a living. I don't want that for you. This is an oportunity for you to be taken care of. Please Ava, do this for me. I can die in peace knowing you will be taken care of." Ava barely heard her words. Backing towards the door, she looked at her mother, tears streaming down her cheeks, hands clenched at her side.
"Your not dying! I will be damned if I abandon you now." Ava shouted, a sob wrenched from her throat. "I cant do this, I need some air..." Ava turned and ran down the hallway, turning to go out the back door, Marion's call drowned out by the sound of the rain and Ava's sobs. Throwing the door open, Ava ran out of the house, accross the yard, and bursting through the gate in the back. Rain blending with her tears, Ava ran through the woods, branches scratching her legs, tearing her dress. Ava stumbled over a tree root, the air knocked out of her.
I cant...I cant...I cant... Ava pulled herself up, running again, her ruined dress becoming heavy with the rain and mud. Almost there...just need to be safe... Ava's chest ached, her breathing labored, but she still ran. Bursting into a clearing, the lake was visable in the moonlight, enticing Ava with her confortable silence. Taking a couple more steps, Ava crumbled, wrapping her arms around her middle, screaming to the sky and the lake, to anyone who could hear. Sobs wracked her body, her world swirling around her. I cant...I cant...I cant... The mantra ran through her mind, her soul, until she finally let the lakes soothing embrace lull her into the temporary safety of slumber.
Cold...I am so cold... Ava jerked awake, shivering so bad her teeth felt like they would chatter right out of her skull. What the...Where... Ava sat up with a start, looking around, sighing in relief when she recognized where she was. Memories of last night came flooding back, fresh tears stinging her eyes. Now is not the time...I have been out all night...Mother will be furious. Picking herself up, Ava stretched, her body aching from sleeping outside. Looking longingly at the lake, Ava turned to go back into the woods, to go back home. Contemplating her choices, Ava walked into her yard hesitantly. I was unfair to mother...I need to apologize. Ava walked accross the yard, giving a quick hello to the horses in their pens. Taking a deep breath, Ava opened the back door and walked in, calling for Marion. Worry knawed her insides as she walked down the hall, looking from room to room.
Ava heard coughing from the living room, prompting her to pick up her pace. Turning the corner, Ava saw her mother curled up in a chaise, her complection much worse than the night before. I worried her and made her condition worse...what kind of daughter does such a thing... Ava moved to her mother's side quickly, startling Marion, who looked at Ava with wide, worried eyes. "Ava! I was so afraid. You ran off so quickly and then you never returned..." Marion sobbed, clutching her daughter almost as tightly as Ava clutched her back. Marion took note of her dress and how cold she was.
"Avangelique Marie! Your soaking wet. What if you were to catch a chill. Seriously child, what were you thinking?" Marion pulled away, giving her daughter a glare, relief coursing through her. Ava smiled sheepishly. Standing up, Ava looked at her mother, her face serious.
"Mother, I thought about what you said. I was being selfish about becoming heir to the throne. I am not happy about the situation, but I will do my best to not be a burden on you. You cant get better if you have to worry about me, after all. I need to change, then I will make us breakfast." Without waiting for a reply, Ava turned and headed upstairs to her room. Marion looked after her daughter, sorrow seeping into her mood. My dear, sweet Ava...I am not going to get better, and It is better if you are not here when I go. Marion layed down her head, breathing deeply, relief alowing her to relax better than she had in a long while.
"I'll miss you mother. Please send me letters as often as you can, and I will try to get time to come visit you." Ava fought to keep the tears from spilling over as she hugged her mother goodbye, the carriage picking her up having just arrived. Marion held on tightly, small sobs shaking her weak body.
Over a single week, Marion and Ava did what they could to prepare for this day. Ava quit her tutoring job, promising to write to her students. Marion and Ava scraped up what money they could so that Ava would have a couple of nice things to wear at the palace, at least until dresses could be made. The last couple of days were hard...I am really going to miss you Mother. But I will make you proud...You'll see... Ava backed away from her mother, a tear running down her cheek. She opened her mouth to speak...
"If the goodbyes are in order, then we shall be on our way. I was hoping to get a tour in before you retired for the night. I wanted to go over what you will be learning starting tomorrow." Giles called from his place by the carriage. As soon as he had arrived, Giles was quick to try and get Ava into the carriage so that they could leave. Ava's body tensed at Giles words, her mouth straightening into a tight line. Doesnt he know first impressions are important...
The carriage had come up the road, stopping just a few feet from where Ava and Marion sat waiting. A young man, no older than 17, had come down from where he drove the horses, running to open the door quickly and then seemed to just stand, waiting for something...that something had come out of the carriage, a smug smile on his jowly face making Ava's stomoach flip flop. The short, pudgy man came up to Ava, bowing low.
" My name is Giles Watson. I will be your tutor and the one to escort you to your new home." Inclining his head towards the young man, who then came forward and began grabbing what few belongings Ava had. "That is Connor, the young man who is in charge of keeping the horses happy and healthy. He is the best driver I know, so who better than he to drive you home." Ava flinched each time he mentioned the palace as her 'home'. Connor gave Ava a kind smile as he packed her things into the carriage. Giving a quick hello, Ava turned to her mother, who had a distressed look on her tear covered face.
"Mother, we said no crying." Ava's voice broke slightly as she embraced her mother, the tapping of Giles foot grating on her nerves.
Turning towards the carriage, Ava ignored Giles as she walked to the door, accepting Connors kind hand to help get her inside. Wow... The carriage was simple, but extravagent at the same time. Silk lined everything but the floor, the sun giving it a shimmer. The cusions were soft, alowing Ava to sink slightly into them. As Giles clambered into the carriage after Ava, a look of irritation on his face, Ava leaned out the window, waving furiously to her mother. Marion waved back, a tearful smile on her face. The carriage lurched forward, signalling their departure. Ava sat back in her seat, looking at Giles warilly. I will be strong. I wont let you down, mother. I will get you a special place in the palace gardens, just for you. Taking a deep, streghnthening breath, Ava looked directly at Giles, determination fueling her words.
"Well, Mr. Watson, shall we begin?"
End Ch 1...Finally. :)
