Disclaimer: I do not own Mobile Suit Gundam Seed. If I did I wouldn't have had half of the people die.
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Italics are comments made by Anonymous
There are plenty of women here in this humble planet; (and uh flying thing around the planet) and most of them have something in common: (excellent thing in common) the ladies love Pimp Daddy Alex Dino. (this name suits me well :) ) Pimp Daddy Alex Dino is certainly the one to bring sexy back! That's right, I'm that hott. (teeth sparkle) I mean, I don't pose like I'm supposed to be on a romance novel cover for nothing. (points to the first Gundam Seed ending where my lovely hair is blowing in the wind, well in most endings I look like a young Fabio.) It's almost a crime to be this sexy. Anyways, on to my report: my harem o pretty ladies.
Lady number one: Lacus Clyne (the HOTT one)
She was my first love and the woman I was supposed to be engaged to. (Stupid Kira! How dare you steal my women. You and your damn sexy legs. The mangled hair that women want to tame! Stupid bastard! I can't stand messy hair. My hair is my glory! It needs to be perfect! Much like my beautiful face. Oh well, I did bang his sister so I guess we are even.) Silly me, back in those days I was too afraid to make the first move. Instead of pecking her cheek when I visited her on my day off, (and Kira was busy banging that what's her-slutty face. Why the hell is he so popular with the ladies! No one out bangs Pimp Daddy Alex Dino! No one!) I should have showed her Pimp Daddy Alex Dino's real mobile suit. Oh well, it wouldn't have worked because of this fine lady:
Lady number two: Carali Yula Something
We lived in Orb together and she was the one to come up with Pimp Daddy Alex Dino if you know what I mean ;)(What the hell? Athrun, I didn't give you that name so stop thinking you are some sorta Pimp. You being ghetto is like Stella being sane! What the hell is with this diary! You're doing the dishes for a month- no three months! Geeze, spell my name right if you don't want to sleep on the couch.) I kinda left her when the war broke out and she started to get all emotional. Seriously, what happened to her rebellious, "Don't tell me what to do" attitude. It was hott! Maybe she's pregnant. Uh...FUCK! Pimp Daddy Alex Dino is no family man. Although, ladies do dug babies... (ponders)
Lady Number Three: Meer Campbell
First one, this girl is crazy. She follows me wherever I go and tries to seduce me. When Kira mentioned some whore trying to screw him, I thought he was just a pussy, but now I know that creepy, weird, girl trying to rape me in my sleep is not something to be proud of. I need to bolt my door in order for this schizophrenic to stay out of my room! Oh well, she isn't as big of a stalker as this fine lady:
Lady Number Four: Lunamaria Hawke
Oh dear, where do I begin: THIS GIRL IS STALKING ME ALL FOR THE WRONG REASONS! I knew being this beautiful will have it's consequences, but I didn't know they would be this bad. Well, she is kinda cute but definitely needs a new hobby like collecting stamps. Brings me to my next lady:
Lady Number Five: Meyrin Haw er Hawke (name sounds familiar, did the creators get lazy even on the names. I thought the new characters were redos. Seriously, I thought my Cagalli had another twin! At least I, Pimp Daddy Alex Dino, remain an original)
Ooo, her sister. (thinks naught thoughts with sisters) She doesn't really do anything except do her actual work! Wow, someone on this show who actually does his or her job! Screw the soap opera storyline, we need to send a positive message: Don't be a lazy bum! There isn't much to say about her except she's kind and does her job! Good job!
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Hope you like the story. Please read and review. The Emo Kira story is over so I wrote this crack fic.
