Disclaimer: No own.
So, I originally had about three different one-shots planned out, but then I realized that it's Christmas tomorrow. Now all three of those ideas have melded together into this very random story.
--x Oh, the weather outside is frightful x--
"Sora, are you sure this will work?"
Six-year-old Roxas stared at his twin brother, wondering how Sora had even come up with the insane plan. As far as he knew, Santa didn't even like ice cream. The poor guy constantly put up with snow—he probably expected warm cookies and warm milk when he got to their house. But no, Sora insisted that they had to be original.
Apparently, originality would convince Santa to put them on the nice list at the last minute.
"Duh, Rock-sas!" Sora yelled, separating the syllables of his brother's name in that oh-so-annoying way, "Everyone loves paopu fruits and sea-salt ice cream!"
Sora set down a glass of paopu fruit juice on the table by their fireplace, then frantically waved for Roxas to join him. The blonde brother sighed and walked over to the table, while Sora ran to the kitchen to get sea-salt ice cream for Santa.
"This is it," Roxas muttered, "Sora and I will be on the naughty list FOREVER. Stupid Sora and his stupid plans."
He looked up when he saw Sora put down a plate with eight bars of sea-salt ice cream. Sora beamed at his brother and exclaimed happily, "Santa's a really big guy, so he'll need lots of ice cream!"
Roxas sighed, "Sora, you just called Santa fat. Now he won't even give us coal. He'll probably burn down our house instead."
--x--
"Hey, Roxas."
"...mehh..."
"Roxas, get up! I heard something!"
"Then stop talking. You're the only one making noise."
"Nuh-uh! I heard something in the chimney! I think it's Santa!"
A third voice entered the conversation, "No, I'm a burglar."
Silence.
"There's a BURGER-LAR!!! AHHH!!!!" Sora screamed, as he ran over to the Christmas tree. He came back with a wooden toy sword and started to jab it up into the chimney while yelling, "GO AWAY!!! SWIPER, NO SWIPING!!!"
"AH!! Kid, stop it!! I'm not really a burglar!!!" The voice in the chimney yelled in between jabs from the child.
"THAT'S JUST WHAT A BURGER-LAR WOULD SAY!"
Roxas got up, taking note of the mostly melted ice cream and full glass of paopu juice on the nearby table. He stood next to his brother, who was still jabbing the burger-lar and asked, "What are you doing in our chimney?"
Sora punctuated his brother's question with another jab, hard enough for the burger-lar to fall out of the chimney and onto their unlit fireplace. As the burger-lar's bright red Santa hat fell back to reveal equally bright red hair, Sora made sure to jab him a few more times. Hard.
"Axel?" The brunette boy asked while he jabbed, "What were you doing in our chimney?"
"I'm your babysitter for the night. I thought I'd make an entrance, but apparently, kids these days don't know how to appreciate theatrics." The fourteen-year-old stood up, only to sit down on the nearby couch where the twins had been sleeping.
"What's with the Santa hat?" Roxas asked, as he watched his brother poke the hat with the toy sword. Knowing Axel, neither of them would've been surprised if it burst into flames.
Axel shrugged and sent them a mischievous smile, "Just call me Axel Claus."
"Axel Claus?" Sora's eyes went wide as he started hitting the redhead once more, "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH SANTA?!!"
"Ow! OW!! KID, STOP IT!"
Roxas sighed, "Yup. We're definitely on the naughty list for life."
--x But the fire is so delightful x--
Um... yeah, this is random. Ha.
Happy Holidays!
