A/N:
I was just venting in the BioWare Social Network this evening and this popped into my head when I thought about ME1, and the ME2 DLC Arrival and what it all meant. I might write a few more of these, I'm not sure.


Conversations with Reapers

What REALLY happened in dark space:

"So... when is this damn relay going to open back to the citadel, I'm getting hungry."

"You're always hungry Bob."

"Well Steve, it has been 50 000 of the mean habital solar orbit times of a planet since we last reigned destruction upon the galaxy."

"Dude, be patient, Soverign has got our backs."

"That's what you said 50 of the mean habital solar orbit times ago."

"What was with that name anyway? Soverign? What was wrong with Chad?"

"The Chad was great."

"Will you three be quiet! Phil, I mean 'Harbinger' *snicker*... is sending us a message."

"...ZZzzzZZtt... go fuck up a planet called Earth... bzzztt"

"Huh?"

"That's it, I'm going to the Alpha relay."

"Chad still might get that citadel relay open."

"Well, it will take 2 of the mean habital solar orbit times to get to the Alpha relay, OR we can wait for Chad."

"..."

"Screw Chad, let's get this party started!"

"Woot!"

"Yeee haw!"

"Is that really your 'ride the bomb' pose?"

"...shut up."

"Alright, we're going to the Alpha relay, any questions?"

"Yeah. Can we keep the Asari?"

"Oh yeah."

"Definitely."

"Those girls know how to party."