It was as if I was eighteen again. I didn't know what was happening. Three days after I was turned, I turned nineteen. I was now eighteen again. It was as if the past seven years had meant nothing, and had never happened. I was supposed to be twenty-six, but I looked the same as I did when I was still living with Charlie, and begging to be turned. A few weeks ago, it had been September 13th, by official birthday. I could only figure that next year I would physically turn nineteen. If I made until then.

It had been a few days since I left, I could have flown to Forks, sure. But driving for days would give me time to think about it. What I was going to do and how I was going to react.

I was almost to Charlie's. I tried to focus on what I needed to do. What needed to be done on my part.

I needed to find Renessme, I needed to find out what happened to me, I needed to find out how James returned, and I needed to know how to help Edward.

There had to be a way. I had to look up anything and everything I could. Every vampire novel, every vampire movie, every vampire myth, every legend, every story, every anything because there had to be a solution, there had to be a cure. There had to be.

If there wasn't...too painful.

If there wasn't I would have to find Renessme. That was my being optimistic. It was the only way to keep going. Sure, I could have found someway to kill myself, cliff diving for example, but I had done that before...and someone had pulled me out of the water. That was the same someone that I needed to call when I got to Charlie's. I would call Jake and invite him down, he was the only one I could talk to about this.

In a few minutes I was in Charlie's driveway, back to Forks again. The cruiser wasn't there so Charlie wasn't home. I knew that I couldn't stay here for long, but I didn't know where else to go. I pulled the keys out of the ignition. I leaned back into the seat.

In my life time I hadn't spent all that much time here. A few years. And yet some of my fondest memories were here. I had good times in Phoenix but this was where the memories would last forever.

I knew that if I sat there any longer that I would begin to cry. I got out of the car, carrying my metal container, and locked it behind me. I walked up to the door and everything felt surprisingly...normal. I hoped that the door was unlocked, and if it wasn't that Charlie still kept the spare key in the same place.

I opened the door without a problem and walked into the house freely. I sat the container down on the end table and looked around a bit. Everything looked as if someone had just been here, not that I could be for sure when Charlie had left.

I thought I heard footsteps upstairs, I thought about turning around, running outside and taking off. But I didn't.

"Charlie?" A voice called from upstairs.

"Jake?" I called.

"Bella?!" he ran down the stairs.

I ran into his arms and he pulled me into his chest.

"What are you doing here?" I smiled for the first time in days.

"Well, if you want me to leave..." he joked, same old Jake.

"You know what I meant." I rolled my eyes.

"Uh...I was um ..."

"What Jake?" I asked furrowing my eye brows.

"I-I was." he looked down at his feet.

"What? Just spit it out."

"You'll be mad at me." he looked up at me, his eyes honest.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused, I took a few steps away from him.

"Bella, I can't-" he choked on his words and looked down again.

"Jake, just tell me."

"I told- I told Charlie...about...you." he looked as if he were about to cry.

"What about me?" I scoffed hoping that by 'about me' that didn't mean 'about all of us'. He couldn't be the reason...

"About you...and Edward..and Renessme... and Alice...and Carlisle...and all of the others. I told them that..." he looked at me, with a pleading look in his eyes. "That...you're vampires." he waited for my response.

I looked down at the floor and resisted the urge to tell him off, tell him about the hell that he had put me through the last few days, tell him about what happened to the others, and to Edward, and to Renessme. But I couldn't. There was a part of me that still saw Jake as my best friend who would always be there for me no matter what. I couldn't stand here and scream at him until I lost my voice.

"Get out." I said looking down, my voice breaking the silence. We stood there for a moment, neither of us knowing what to do. I walked to the kitchen and stood by the phone, waiting for Alice's call.

"Bella, please let me explain..." he called after me, turning around to walk towards me.

"Jake no!" I said a bit louder than necessary. "Please, don't make it harder." tears were streaming down my cheeks.

"Bella, I-"

"Jake..." I shut my eyes and felt a lump in my throat.

I swallowed hard. "Get out."

He shook his head searching for words.

"I'll call you when I'm ready...but right now I'm waiting for a phone call. Now leave."

"I-"

"Give it up Jake!" I cut him off.

He stood there for awhile, the he turned and slammed the door.

I knew he was mad at me, even though he had no rite to be. Sure, I didn't let him explain himself, but why should I. I would listen when I was ready to deal with him. I couldn't think of anything that would have made him do something like that. When he left, everything in the past had been smoothed over and behind us.

Or so I thought.

I was sure to have time on my hands, I didn't know when Alice would call, but I wasn't expecting it to be soon.

I decided to go up to my room and see if Charlie had done anything to it since I had left. I walked up the stairs slowly. Not knowing what to expect.

I got to the top of the stairs and walked into the last room on the left. I turned the knob and looked around at the room.

It didn't look much different, in fact it wasn't different at all. There was still a rocking chair in the corner, still a bad in the middle of the room, a desk with an ancient computer on it, and yellow curtains were on the windows. It all felt very familiar, almost normal. I had some of the best moments of my life in here. I looked at the window and remembered all the times he had snuck in without Charlie knowing, that lead me tot think of the first time he had done this with my knowledge. And that lead to me thinking about that day, in the meadow. I remembered how careful he was with me, how gentle and worried he was about hurting me. I felt tears running down my cheeks. I had always wondered what it felt like to lose someone that you couldn't live without...this was it.

I heard the phone ring then, and all traces of anger and dissapointment vanished. I ran down stairs, supringly not tripping.

"Hello?" I answered before the first ring finished.

"Bella?" Alice's voice chimed.

"Alice." I sighed, thankful to hear her voice.

"Bella, I am so sorry."

"Don't be...it's not your fault."

"Bella, you don't get it. I didn't tell you."

"Well when would you've had the chance."

"Bella, I had at least seven years to warn you about this."

"What do you mean? You can't see Renessme's future." I shook my head.

"Not normally, but I did once."

"When?" I asked coldly.

"When Renessme was about a year old. I told Jake about it. I didn't want to tell you because-"

"Because what?" I asked appalled at the fact that she would do that to me.

"Because I was waiting."

"For what Alice?"

"For another vision. I knew that if I could see her again then I would tell you, but I didn't."

"Why Jake? Why did you tell him and not Edward, or Carlisle?"

"Because if Edward knew then he would tell you and you would immediately put iron bars in her windows and locks on her door. If I told Carlisle, he would tell you and then the same would happen. But if I told Jake he would understand, he would get that things will go wrong and not turn out the way everyone wanted, but he would deal with it when it came around and not seven years earlier."

"Some help he was."

"What do you mean by that?" she asked.

"He told Charlie, and I'm sure he told Renee, about you. All of you, and myself at the time. He told him all about you."

"Why?"

"I don't know. He was here when I came here and I yelled at him, I was so angry Alice. I never thought he would do something like that, when I found out what he did I kicked him out."

"Don't worry about it. But when you think you can talk to him and listen to his side of the story, then you need to tell me. Now I'll call every day at this time. Do you think that Charlie will be there?"

"No, he's not here now."

"Okay good." she tried to end the conversation.

"Alice, what did you see?"

"When?"

"Seven years ago? From what I hear my daughter was involved."