Perverted Minds

Disclaimer: I do not own any part in the Kingdom Hearts franchise,

By: Karma's Slave

Rated: T, for language

A/N: this is my first Kingdom Hearts fan-fic. Sorry for out of character-ness, for some of the characters, I haven't quite grasped them yet.

This story was inspired by this fan-art piece, .com/fs44/f/2009/060/a/b/ARXion___That__s_what_she_said_by_

--

It was always such a beautiful day here on the beach of Destiny Islands. But it was such a shame that the three suspicious cloak wearing figures could never ever truly enjoy the beauty of it, or at least's that's what their criminally insane nut sac of a leader, Xemnas says. But what would mansex know anyway.

"So what are you going to do Xion?" asked the tall red-headed figure. They all were…well two of them were sitting on the slanted palm tree while one just leaned against as if he were James Dean the rebel without a cause. But he wasn't he was Axel, the flurry of dancing flames, the resident pyromaniac of the world that never was and he would make sure that you memorized it.

Xion, looking down at the sand, as if it had become more then just interesting "I…" she started to say "I want to be together with two people" said Xion, still with her blue eyes focused on the sand. She held her hands together. While the other figures in black, Roxas had placed one of his hands on hers.

"What the hell did she just say" thought Axel and Roxas at the same time.

Axel and Roxas just stayed their frozen. While Xion looked at her comrades with concern, or the extent of what was thought to be concern, this no feeling emotions or some what feeling was really getting annoying and they all had senior nut sac to thank for that.

== In Roxas's Inner Mind Theater ==

"Oh Roxas, won't you join us." Said mind theater Xion, as she was standing next to familiar Blonde girl, he had met at castle oblivion.

Mind theater Roxas, smiled

== Intermission ==

I'm Sorry but Axels' inner Mind Theater has been canceled due to an overly horny perverted pyromaniac who has caused the setting that was once the set, to spontaneously combust with fire …..Uh crap…I mean creative differences! Yes…yes creative differences and that's the story we are sticking with do you hear me!!!

Now please enjoy your regularly scheduled fan-fiction.

Xion hopped of the tree, just in time to catch Roxas and Axel with blood erupting from their nose, her eyes widen, "you perverts…I didn't mean it like that you fucking perves!" she yelled at the top of her lungs as she thrusted her left arm angrily, the Kingdom Key, appearing in her hand.

"Oh shit!" Axel and Roxas screamed in surprise as Xion was usually level-headed. With a wave of his hand Axel opened a dark portal that he and Roxas, smartly ran into.

--

Meanwhile

Demyx was returning from his mission from the underworld. He had just gotten out in time before he was about to become Cerberus newest chewing toy. "That was close one" he murmured to himself.

A portal opened and out came running Roxas and Axel, "hey you two, you're looking beyond lively today" greeted the sitar wielding nobody.

"Talk later, RUN NOW" Roxas yelled as if he just went insane.

"Got It Memorized!" said Axel

--

Elsewhere

"Ahh he said it" the fan-girl squeed.

--

Demyx raised an eye brow at the two nobodies. As he was now looking into the direction of where they just came from, "Hey Xion" well he would of had said if it weren't for the kingdom key smacking him right in the face.

"Sorry Demyx! But Roxas and Axel must die!!" she yelled while running past Demyx. His hands were now covering his face 'Maybe Cerberus wasn't so bad after all' he thought to himself.

--

Xigbar was hanging from one of his portals, spying with his one little eye on a certain savage nymph, till Axel and Roxas popped in causing Xigbar to throw himself off guard as he now lost a grip to his to his own power.

The room was filled with the sounds of thuds and an aggravated female scream which could pass for a war cry.

Xigbar had landed right on the target of his personal spy game Larxene, face first into her chest, where the muffled word, that sounded close to, "comfy"

And as if this story wasn't uncreative enough, with character entrances, soon came in Xion, who had actually stopped for a second, at the sight before her. "Not looking, not looking" she said over and over as she was climbing over them. Larxene was seriously pissed off now and soon came the lightening.

--

"Axel this looks like a good place to hide" spoke Roxas

"Roxas, This is a cleaning supply room, that I've never knew existed before" complained Axel.

"You want to go back out there" retorted Roxas

"It's a lovely cleaning supply room, that I've never knew existed before!" Axel mockingly replied

"I could do without the sarcasm Axel,"

"I've got a better idea" said a third voice. Axel and Roxas froze with what they thought was fear….yeah it was fear and as they slowly turned around to see Xion, behind them, holding her keyblade, tapping it into her hand, like a clichéd Italian goon who worked for the mafia, whom just happened to be holding a baseball bat.

"No, that's not possible, how'd you get here before us? " Axel asked, while Roxas stood there looking confused.

"That doesn't matter, what really matter is that I'm here" She said, raising her keyblade. Both boys screamed for their non-existent lives

--

(Cut to outside the castle that never was, of the world that never was)

"Once again, we're sorry for the interruption, but trust me you do not want to see that."

So please enjoy this musical number

"All my friends, know the low-rider"

--

"Vexen, the medical reports" said nut sac…no...Um mansex…. (Snaps fingers) Xemnas.

"Demyx, is icing his face,

Xigbar is peeling off the dead skin, however when Larxene went to harm Xigbar, she managed to get her foot, shoved up his ass and now her boot is stuck

Roxas, is suffering from seconded degree purple nurples, and was bitch-slapped with a keyblade…consistently

And as for Axel, he's the first being in history to have his testicles shoved up his ass." Vexen finished explaining.

The End.