An adventure into the realms of pure crack. Part 2 of a billion.
Prussia. Full stop. Less crack-y than Bouncing Terror, but I imagine virtually anything involving Prussia to be crack. It's Prussia.
Enjoitsu.
"AHAHA! The awesome me is awake!" Prussia screamed as he stretched on his bed. He was sure he heard a "thump" from right above his head- where West's bed was upstairs. He had made sure to put his bed riiiight beneath his little brother's when he decided to move into West's basement.
"Alright! Gilbird! AWESOME BIRD! Where are you?" Prussia yelled- or rather spoke, it was just that he always yelled.
He thought he heard a groan, but couldn't imagine why so chose to ignore it.
He stepped off his bed and stuck his feet inside she chicky slippers waiting for him. Not only were they chicks, they "cheeped" with every step Prussia took. He peered around, looking for the bird that was usually perched atop his head, not seeing or hearing it anywhere.
He "hmm"ed thoughtfully and shuffled about the area around his bed, looking under his blankets, pillows, stuffed birds… No Gilbird anywhere. He leaned back against his bookshelf- full of books about the history of Prussia- and continued to think. Usually Gilbird was sitting on his pillow when he woke up, or perched in his birdcage next to his bed; the bird was in neither place.
"GILBIRD, WHERE ARE YOU?" Gilbert glanced at the clock- 0506. Maybe the little bird was outside getting something to eat? He shrugged and began walking towards the little bathroom he made West install in the basement and let out a little holler.
"KESESE! I'm so awesome that I even fooled MYSELF!"
He had found himself tangled in a mess of rope that he had laid down as some sort of trap in case anybody decided to invade his personal space. Like France. He laughed to himself as he freed himself, tugging the trip back into place and replacing the hanging net. He continued to laugh as he tiptoed his way around his basement, avoiding getting caught in any further traps.
He stepped into the bathroom and turned to grin at his reflection, spotting the little bird on top of his head. "GILBIRD! WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING?" he cracked another grin and scooped the bird off his head to place it on the counter.
"The awesome me needs a shower!" he announced before divesting himself of his clothing. A cry of "go back to sleep, bruder" from upstairs went ignored as Prussia turned on the water before jumping in, not even bothering to check the temperature.
The water was freezing. "HAHA." Prussia nervously laughed, "I am taking an awesomely cold shower, today!" He washed as quickly as he could, refusing to make the water warmer.
Once he was redressed, chicky slippers safely on his feet again, he strode over to his unmade bed, grabbing his laptop and getting caught in another trap along the way.
He settled down in the mess of blankets and sheets, dumping aforementioned laptop onto his lap and opened it, preparing himself to update his blog.
"SO THE AWESOME ME HAS AWOKEN.
My traps are so awesome that I trapped myself. That's how awesome I am."
He typed away, laughing to himself under his breath, a steady stream of "Kesesesese" echoing up the stairs to the first floor since he had pointedly opened the door after his shower.
"I wrote this, I think you should all read it to see how absolutely awesome it is."
"AustriaxSwitzerland(dot)exe"
Prussia finished his update before tossing his laptop onto his nightstand. He sat for a moment on his bed, wondering what to do next.
"TIME TO FIND ITALIA-CHAN!" Prussia announced to nobody in particular before tumbling off his bed in his excitement. He chuckled as he righted himself, getting dressed in a flash and bounding up the stairs as loudly as he possibly could. He heard an alarm go off and grinned to himself.
It was 0830! West was finally getting up! He always slept in a bit on Sundays. He ran to his little brother's bedroom and stood outside the door, anticipating it opening.
He tensed as the door handle began to turn and then promptly tackled the body behind the door, laughing obnoxiously as he straddled the brunette on the floor.
Wait. Brunette?
Prussia stopped laughing and whipped his head down, finding himself straddling a very naked and very surprised Italian.
Well he found Italia-Chan.
And received a fist to the face, resulting in everything going black.
…
"Ve~ Germany! How could you knock your own brother out?" Prussia heard from above him.
West groaned, "He was all over you, Italia."
"He was just saying hello!" Italy insisted, flailing his arms all over the place, causing Prussia to wiggle around on the couch. Apparently he was laying on Italy's lap.
Prussia peeked an eye open when he heard West retreat to the kitchen and glanced up towards Italy.
"Oh! Prussia are you okay?" Italy asked once he realised the white-haired man was staring at him.
A grin cracked across Prussia's face and he reached up to hug Italia-chan. "You're so cute Ita-chan!" he exclaimed, squeezing the smaller nation to himself. Italy didn't hesitate to hug back- he was always a huggy little thing.
Prussia squeezed him, grinning and laughing when West came back into the room.
"Oi, West!" Prussia grinned.
"East." he responded, keeping his face straight. Prussia just laughed, brushing the 'insult' off.
"Germany! We should make pasta!" Italy proclaimed, wiggling free of Prussia's hug.
West shot Prussia a grin, so quickly he wasn't entirely sure it had been there- but then, considering what had just happened, it probably had. Prussia assumed now was as good a time as any to go back down to his basement. He wondered how long he had been unconscious as he stomped down the stairs, creating as much noise as possible.
"Gilbird, let's make music!" he suggested to the bird that chirped and flitted off of his head onto a small drum Prussia had made for his pet. It began bouncing around when Prussia picked up the pair of drumsticks he used while drumming for Ore-sama no Band and winked. He started not as loudly as he intended but tap-tap'd on the water pipes that ran across the ceiling of the basement, creating a clanging noise that adhered to no particular rhyme or rhythm.
"KESESESEsesesese…" he laughed as he continued drumming on the pipes, getting louder and hitting them more violently as he went on. He smashed the pipes as hard as he could with the sticks until one of the sticks snapped and a loud "creaaaak" sounded from the pipes. He grinned mischievously and hit the spot again with his remaining stick over and over.
West was, by this point, screaming at Prussia to stop, but, as usual, he paid the threats no heed and continued beating on the pipe.
It gave under the stick and cold water immediately flooded into the basement, soaking the man and making him laugh even harder.
He heard heavy steps bound overhead and flung the stick- and stick pieces- into an obscure corner just in time for West to fling the basement door open and storm down the stairs, Italia-chan standing, looking very small, in the doorway.
"DID YOU BREAK MY PIPES?" a now soaked West screamed into Prussia's face.
Prussia's eyes went wide. "THE AWESOME ME DIDN'T TOUCH YOUR STUPID PIPES, WEST." he screamed back, meeting the taller German as best he could.
West let out a frustrated growl and turned about, stomping back up the stairs to call a repairman. Prussia couldn't contain the laughter bubbling in his throat at the sight of his brother looking like a drowned rat and exploded into another fit of laughs while Italy trailed after West again.
…
Some hours later, West had managed to find an emergency repairman that would come over, even on Sundays. The pipe was fixed but they were left with a soaked basement and Prussia was making sure everybody knew he was unhappy with the situation.
"IT'S FLOODED."
"It's your own fault, Prussia."
"I DIDN'T TOUCH YOUR STUPID PIPES, WEST."
"I don't know how you did it, but I know you did it."
"Ve~ Maybe he didn't really do it."
"THAT'S RIGHT, I DIDN'T DO IT. THAT'S NOT AWESOME AT ALL."
"He did it, Italia."
"WELL, I CAN'T SLEEP DOWN THERE, LET ME SLEEP WITH YOU, WEST."
West froze, staring at his brother. He was right, he couldn't sleep down there. He might get sick or drown or something equally stupid like that. He groaned and nodded once.
"I… You can sleep in my bed for tonight only. Tomorrow you fix your room."
Prussia broke out into another grin and hugged his brother tight, before grabbing Italia-chan and hugging the both of them as tight as he could.
"Let go, Prussia."
Prussia laughed and let the both of them go before running down the hallway to West's room to prepare himself for sleep.
…
"I'M SO AWESOME!"
"Shut up, Prussia."
"I can't, it's my bedtime mantra."
"Don't do it tonight."
"BUT I'M SO AWESOME."
"…"
"MAN I AM SO AWESOME. SO AWESOME!"
"Go to sleep, Gilbert."
"THE AWESOME ME CANNOT SLEEP WITHOUT SAYING HOW AWESOME I AM."
"…"
"I AM SO, SO AWESOME. I'M THE MOST AWESOME EVER."
"…"
"I… Am SOOOOO awesome…"
A/N :: Can just imagine Prussia having a "bedtime mantra".
