Here is my first Dragon Age (Inquisition) fanfic.
Now please understand that I love Dorian Parvus for who he is... But I just have to make this and let my frustrations out. DA is actually my first RPG game in PS4 and he's the first character whom I had a crush on and turns out that he, as he said, "enjoys the company of men." My first PS4-gamer heartbreak. I JUST HAVE to write this. To console my heart. I know I'm not the only one who was captivated by his charm and was left broken upon finding out that he... is... gay. Don't get me wrong, I love the LGBTQ and my best friend is actually one so... Back to the story :D
Quick Disclaimers :
I don't own any of the characters here, aside from Elle Trevelyan, whom I have created when I played the game.
Dorian is still confused about his sexuality and I find it weird that I ship him with The Ironbull.
It was an incredibly long day for him. To be surprised is an understatement since he never expected that his father would seek him out and most of all, apologize. He peered through his window and stared at the sky. He breathed in and out, taking in the events that transpired the entire day. He sighed and collapsed on the armchair nearby. It's still a lot to take in.
He inhaled deeply and exhaled it slowly and decided to take his mind off it, stood up to get a book to read. As he turned around, he saw her leaning on one of the shelves, examining some of the books on his collection. She smiled softly and looked at him, "That went well," she commented.
He allowed himself to smile at her concern.
They've been friends for a while and he might have taken a bit of liking for her, except that he's, well to put it, enjoying the company of men. The problem is, he can't put a finger on it since he somehow placed her in a different category. He chuckled lightly, "I am still trying to distinguish if it was real or just a dream. Cause I'm pretty certain it was a dream, but then you being here, confronting me about it tells me that... then again, maybe it was real... Unless... you're... an illusion."
Elle Trevelyan returned a soft chuckle and shook her head lightly. She looked at him with a concerning look, a soft smile never leaving her lips. She pursed her lips, bit her lower lip then finally asked, "Dorian, you tell me if it's all real."
He knew what she's talking about. Honestly, he does not know whether to hate or like this woman. She kind of stirred some unknown feelings deep within, a feeling he never knew existed, and he does not know what to make of it.
He returned her gaze and her smile, "I'm afraid it is all true," he answered.
"What about the flirting?" she raised an eyebrow at him and crossed her arms.
"Well, I kind of led you on, didn't I?" she nodded at him and he offered an apologetic smile, "I can stop if you want to."
"No. Don't you dare," she said.
"Fine," he said and clicked his tongue, "If you say so. Inquisitor's orders, one I can't refuse," he answered back and paused for a bit and smiled apologetically, "I'm truly sorry. I like women. I think they're fine, majestic creatures, especially you above all else. Maybe in another life, or time or another world."
She shook her head softly, "Don't apologize Dorian. It's not your fault. I don't want to stop you from being who you truly are. If you change, then you're not the Dorian whom I adore so much," she said, a smile adorning her face, "However, I do hope I'd get to meet you in another time, world or life." She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek, "Good night my pretty boy."
She bid him goodnight and left then she headed to her own quarters. She's extremely disappointed that someone who is smart, good looking and strong mage like Dorian likes men more than women. Oh how she would give anything to feel him even just once, at least she can say that he was once hers and she was his, even for a moment. She inwardly scolded herself for her inappropriate thoughts. But she knew that kind of fell for him. Now she has to forget about these feelings because she loves him for who he is and he is one of the most important people in her life.
She was deep in her thoughts that she did not hear their commander calling her until he caught up with her. "Inquisitor," called their Knight-Commander Cullen, who was catching his breath, "I've got some news about Corypheus."
"Right. Work," she mentally told herself, "So much work to do," she smiled at Cullen for all his efforts. "What is it, Cullen?" Then they talked about the news that they've got and gone to the war room to plan, then se, she retired for the night.
Two weeks already passed and they were loaded with missions. She really didn't have any time to think and she was so thankful for that since there's no time to worry about other things aside from surviving and winning. Now they're back at Skyhold and nothing feels better than being home, plus being able to beat a dragon and brought a lot of new crafting materials for weapons and armors. They all took a break. They earned it. There's nothing wrong with that. For sure, even Corypheus takes a break from murdering living things.
Elle took her own mug of beer and looked for a place to sit down.
"Hey shiny!" Sera called unto her with a big smile on her flustered face.
She smiled and made her way to where Sera is and sat down. She saw Varric and Blackwall on the table, however, they seemed to be engaged in a serious talk about something.
"What's with the glum face?" Sera commented and scowled, "We just defeated a big lizard and you're with a serious face."
Truthfully, now that they're back at Skyhold, the feelings that were set aside came back rushing and all she did was to bury herself in work or look for something to slay. But now, there's nothing to do or think about, well Corypheus is a constant worry so he doesn't really count, she kind of stopped thinking about the crazy mage. She really didn't know what to do so she just took a big gulp on her mug.
Sera huffed and commented that she's being a mood killer, but she stayed with her and told her stories aside from their cookie time at the roof and somehow her mind drifted a bit until one of the subjects of her mind (the other is Corypheus) came in with Ironbull, Cassandra, and Cullen. She diverted her gaze and focused on Sera's stories but she can't help but feel that someone's watching her and she can only guess that it's the man she's thinking about.
Dorian entered the tavern and sat down at one of the tables and order a mug of liquor. It's been a while since they took a break and he has to admit that this one is needed and well-deserved.
He watched everyone as he took a swig from his mug and listened to the stories from Ironbull. This is a calm before the storm. It's gonna hit them later on or they're going to encounter another one anytime soon. They needed to become stronger. He sighed and scanned the room and saw his teammates enjoying themselves until his ears caught an all-too-familiar feminine laugh, then he turned his head towards the person and his eyes fell on her.
He watched her as she listened to Sera's stories, occasionally bringing her mug to her red, soft lips, agonizingly saw how she licked the liquor from the sides of her mouth to prevent it from dripping, then how she loosened her hair and let it fall on her back and how she gathered them all on her left shoulder, bringing in her long graceful neck and shoulder blades into view, and noticed that the neckline of her top is a bit lower than usual that there's hint of her cleavage, he knew that she has such generous bosoms and that's when he noticed that she's not wearing her usual inquisitor's clothes, but something similar to Sera's top clothing, only it falls a bit higher from her knees, but not too short, though it doesn't hide her creamy thighs and legs as she shifted crossing them from one leg to another. Then he saw her casually scanning the surroundings, and her eyes passed him then went back to him and gave him a very warm smile and before he could blink his eyes, her attention was back to Sera. That made her look very beautiful and at that very moment, he knew he was so fucked up. That smile fucked him up.
He inwardly banged his head on the table. "Why can't things go back to the way it was? When she was just the inquisitor and he's the self-loving tevinter who enjoys the company of men. Period," he cringed inwardly. He sighed at his agony and confusion. Then he looked at the contents of his mug and drank it bottoms up. Then asked for a refill. "That's right. Keep it coming," he thought to himself.
He knew that his preference has not changed, however, there's something about this woman that he can't put his finger on. She captivated him and just like he said, she's a woman above all else and maybe in another life, if they meet, he would be with her but not in this time. He took another swig from his mug, and drowned the entire contents again, then asked for a refill. This Lady Trevelyan had gotten him so confused that now he is questioning his preference, a bit. He was so lost in his thoughts and he was taken away from his current state of frustration when as he was dragged away from the tavern.
"What the fuck?!" he said when he was released from a death hold and saw that it was Ironbull who dragged him away and he realized that he must have ignored him all throughout the night.
"You don't have to apologize," he heard the Qunari say to him and he thought, "Like hell, I would," and took another swig from his mug with a scowl on his handsome face.
"You were looking at her the entire night," the big guy said as a matter of factly, "And judging by the looks that you paid her moments ago, you wanted to kill her yet make her feel the state of emotions that she put you in."
Dorian was even more annoyed that Ironbull was able to verbalize what he could not. He was so ready to blast him off, except that he left his staff inside the tavern.
"She confuses you," Ironbull chuckled softly, "You have to face those emotions first Dorian. Come back to me when you've done that, blow off the steam or do something to that. Also, don't worry about that. Love does not have any gender. Just remember... She's still a woman whom I also admire and adore. If you settle this in a way that she'll be left hurting, I won't forgive you. I might be the first one to break your bones. Also, Quns don't share," then he left the tevinter to his thoughts.
He stayed outside and leaned on one of the trees to think. Maybe that's why he can't bring himself to commit or start something with Ironbull. "Fuck my life," he thought. He sensed someone coming out of the tavern, so he hid since he wanted to avoid any conversations which he's not really in any mood of doing so. He waited for the coast to be clear and went back to his spot.
However, he almost shit his pants when someone sneaked on him.
"Why are you hiding Dorian?"
He almost punched the person who almost gave him a mini-heart attack then he saw it's Sera. Face very flushed from the alcohol, speech a little bit slurry, eyes glinting with mischief and the elf is sporting a teasing smirk. He gave her a slight credit and realized why she was always sent out on spy and assassin missions by Leliana. She sat down beside him and took a swig from her own mug.
"So, guy problems?" she asked nonchalantly and she was rewarded with questioning and surprised look and she only rolled her eyes on him, "Come on. I can tell," gulps her liquor, "Totally can tell."
He remembered that Sera enjoys the company of women more than men so there's no hiding that fact. He sighed and relaxed his shoulders and drank his beer.
"It's not a guy problem..." He answered as he felt his face blush a bit, "It's a lady problem..." Then he felt a bit confused and frustrated at the same time, "Or… Both?" He knew his face is so flustered right now and he's so conflicted and extremely baffled at his situation, "Can we not talk about it? My head hurts," took another swig from his mug and leaned his head back to the tree behind.
"Oooooo," she laughed, "The I-like-him-She-likes-me-But-I-kind-of-like-her-But-he-likes-me-I-don't-know-what-to-do Game." He rolled his eyes at her. Leave to it to the elf to put it like that. She leaned her head against the tree and looked at him, "That's a tough game. Must be a very special lady to make you feel this crazy," then she sipped on her mug, "Lucky you," she muttered and sighed.
They were both basking in the comfortable silence between them when the tevinter broke it by a frustrated chuckle, "What do mean, 'lucky me,' there's nothing lucky here," he said, "But you're right, Sera, she is very special, full of beauty, majesty, and nothing parallels her charm in all the worlds out there," he hit the back of his head against the tree a bit hard, "Shame she's a woman and curse her for putting me under her spell," he said in much distress.
She drank the contents of her mug and stood up, "I once had the same problem. I dealt with him first, well you know, since he gave me confusing emotions just to relieve the sexual tension. But I swore to myself that it's just one night. I'll let myself do that for just one night... I... think. Well, you know what I mean right? After I dealt with him, I became me again. Plus we're still good friends up to this day," she winked at him, "Oh, and after him, I went back to her. But we ended it after some time cause some things just don't work out," she said as she dusted her clothes off.
Just when she was about to leave, Dorian realized something about the elf... That she was always looking at the same woman who has been stressing him out lately. he usually catches her lingering gaze on her, or how she perks up whenever she hears her voice or when her name comes up in their conversations. And that realization placed a knowing, yet teasing smile on his face.
"Wait," he called out and she looked at him in question, "You also like her," and upon saying that, the already red-faced elf turned redder if possible as her eyes grew bigger. He waited for any response, but she only waved at him and he was once again left alone with his thoughts and he pondered about what Sera and Ironbull said.
He can't stop picturing her radiant smile and how wonderful it must be to caress her slender and elegant neck.
"Fuck my life," he thought to himself for the second time that night And this is hurting his head. Very much.
He stood up and emptied the contents of his mug, "Fuck this. I can't deal with this shit right now," he went into the tavern and took his staff and went out of Skyhold to clear his mind.
