The Phoenix


Suggested Theme:

Main Theme- If You Could Only See by Tonic


Kylo Ren hates to admit that General Hux is surprisingly competent without his flunkies; the ginger secured the area and checked the entrance for any traps before Kylo got to the temple without any problems. Hux's also astonishingly attractive out of his uniform: a dark trench coat, a gray long-sleeved tunic, dark pants, and knee-high boots with low heels take the place of the stiff and starchy uniform. He is utterly convinced that Hux is only wearing those tight, dark pants because they make his small ass even more pert. Unfortunately, he can only catch glimpses when the Sith Temple is kind of enough to let a draft in and blow up the trench coat.

I wish I could hate that trench coat, but it's so slick and slim, highlighting his elfin frame perfectly. Why can't he dress like this all the time? It's in line with dress code standards and all he would need is his armbands. Is the hat part of the dress code? I hope not. I like his hair free from the gel; he looks like a rogue that would ravish innocent princes…

"…Kylo, we've reached a fork in the path." Hux's voice wavers into his thoughts, and Kylo returns to the sight of reality. There is a fork in the stone path like Hux said, but there's a plaque in Ancient Sith that may illuminate the paths. Unfortunately, Kylo hasn't progressed far in his Ancient Sith lessons these past five years, and he doubts someone like Hux could understand anything beyond Basic.

"Ah, but Darth Simi was kind of enough to leave instructions. The right hall is layered with death traps that would surely kill us both. The left hall is the guarantee way to reach her tomb, but it requires a sacrifice. An innocent sacrifice. How supremely vague, but I bet it really means a Jedi considering her proclivities…"

"Um, Hux since when can you read Ancient Sith?"

"Since all my life. It was one of the first languages are learn alongside Naboo. After those, learning languages became downhill, especially Basic. By the time I was nine, I was fluent in Nagaian, Utapese, Mando'a, Sy Bisti, Minnisiat, and Cheunh as much as a human can be fluent in the Chiss's natural language." Hux even demonstrates his fluency by repeating his statement in all those languages for the next two minutes.

"…You don't strike me as the worldly kind." Kylo expects Hux to give his patent sneer, but the ginger smirks at him with his tantalizing lips.

"I can't advertise the fact that I know a slew of alien languages, even though humans are the aliens in the Unknown Regions…" Hux grumbles briefly before continuing. "It also helps that I spent most of my childhood with my uncle who is a privateer."

"So a pirate working for the government? I knew that the First Order had a couple of those…"

"No! He'd never work for us; he has a reputation to maintain and all! Anyways, I grew up interacting with all sorts of people and picked up a lot of languages. I even learned some Umbarese from this assassin that had to hide with us." He ends it with a silly wink.

"Why can't you be like this all the time?"

"No one in the First Order would take me seriously if I acted like myself."

"Why are you acting like yourself now?"

"We could die here, so what's the point of lying to you? And it's not like you respected me as General Hux."

"It took you over a year to realize that?" Kylo musters some disbelief, but profound annoyance overpowers it.

"No, I realized that while I was lying in medbay with a dislocated shoulder and a bruised spleen." He practically sings and even smiles like a bastard.

"You tackled me from behind like a dumbass kid!"

"Because you were acting like a dumb-arse bully!"

Both are growing red in the face.

"He spilt his nuclear-hot caf on me!"

"Because you were standing in his blind spot! How was he supposed to know you were right around the corner!? Would you care to explain to me why you were there?"

The freckles stand out on his red face, even in this poorly-lit corridor. We were only in the sun for ten minutes, but he's as pale as an Umbaran. He's lucky not to burn…

"You'd never asked me that before!" Kylo shouts and sees that some of his spit lands on Hux's right cheek. Hux wipes it away with the back of his left hand.

"Well, I didn't have a chance to ask since you used your telekinesis to knock the air out of my lungs!" Kylo can see the spittle hit part of his mask, but he doesn't bother to wipe it away.

"The Force. It's called the Force." Kylo mumbles this time.

"Please, don't be a Hellion." Hux groans like he was smashed against the wall again.

"Since when is being pedantic akin to troublemaking?" Kylo says sarcastically, expecting Hux to yell at him again.

"I didn't mean the literal definition. I meant the character. He's from New X-Men: Academy X. He and his team even have their own mini-series named after them. They're comic books, Lord Ren." Kylo continues to stare blankly at Hux.

"Hux, I didn't know you even knew what comic books were until now. Also, I have never been a huge fan of comics."

"Perhaps, I can convince you to be a true-believer over a few drinks!" Hux winks again, and Kylo is ashamed that he's turned on by it.

"Master ordered us to investigate this temple."

"And we did. Odds are some dark siders before us picked this place clean. There's probably nothing at the end of either path, so why should we continue wasting our time?"

"I don't think Master will accept that as a valid reason to end our mission."

"Then, I'll get you so wasted that you'll forget all of this."

"…..Then, how am I going to remember you convincing me to give comic books a second chance?"

"I'll just have to be that convincing!" Hux boasts with a grin that showcase his pearly teeth.

I've never noticed that they're slightly crooked. I guess they didn't have orthodontists in the Order's tumultuous beginning.

"Fine. But if I somehow do remember this, I'm telling Master that this was all your fault."

"I'll melt your icy heart with my hot licks!" Hux retorts with all his usual confidence and sprints away from the fork in the paths, leaving Kylo completely befuddled.

WHAT!?


"Hux, what the hells did you mean by–" Kylo demands as he finally exits the temple, but then he stops and causes his mask to fly forward and tumble down the steps. Kylo covers his ears as he hears a child screeching from the bottom of the temple steps. He hears the child clamoring up the steps, but his mind is more concerned with vanity.

Huh, since when were my ears so huge!?

He looks at his hands and nearly screams as he notices how small his hands have become. He looks down and realizes that his boots should not be up to his thighs nor that his tunic should be touching the black stones.

Understanding hits him like a frigate when the child makes it to the top. The child has red hair that reaches down to his tunic-covered knees and mischievous green eyes. He has no pants, but the long-sleeved engulfs his body, leaving his bare feet poking out like a kid that couldn't find his mother's heels. The trench coat drags behind him like a bridal train.

"Kylo, your nose is magnificent!" The child rocks back and forth on the balls of his dirtied feet like he's hopped up on fizzyglug.

"Hux?" His deep voice has become nearly as reedy as the ginger child before him.

"Ah, yeah, who else would it be? Young Medusa?" Little Hux tries to snorts but ends up sneezing, causing his hair to smother his face. The child uses two hands to tame back his red locks.

"Hux, how old are we!?"

"Considering the length of my hair, I'd say about nine. I didn't get my hair shorn until I went into the Academy, which wasn't until I was ten."

That sounds about right. My nose and ears were so big back then; I had to hide them with elaborate hair styles and accessories until I got sent to the pfassking Praxeum where luxurious finery had to be left in Embassy Row!

"Did the temple do this?"

"Most likely. Maybe the trap was de-aging those that refused to complete the temple and returned to the entrance. Or Darth Simi is punishing us from beyond the tomb."

"…So we have to complete the temple?"

"Maybe. But this is a Sith we're dealing with. It wouldn't shock me that she was petty enough to not reverse it if we did complete the temple. Perhaps, this is just temporary, and it'll wear off by tomorrow."

"And if it doesn't?"

"I guess we do whatever the hells we want until we find a way to restore ourselves."

"Or we can go to Master and he could help us find a way."

"Yeah, you do that, I'm getting wasted and waiting this out."

"Hux, we're nine, no trustworthy adult would sell us booze!"

"Maybe the ones you know, but I know a Jawa who knows me well and knows the poodoo that Sith Temples pulled. Although, this is way stranger than the time my hair turned pink."

"Hux, I'm starting to realize that I know nothing about you."

"Let's remedy that then!" Hux holds out his hand, free of its cheap leather confines, it's white like the delicate bones poking through the paper-thin skin. Kylo accepts the hand and allows himself to be led away from the temple.

They disappear into the forest, leaving behind their adult enmity for childish innocence.


Author's Comments- Here are the links:

This is what I imagined Hux to be wearing when he's out adventuring in Darth Simi's Sith Temple, except remove the X's. I've always been a huge fan of Jean Grey, which would explain my redhead obsession with fictional characters, and I've always liked this outfit: a href=" . /marveldatabase/images/6/60/Jean_Grey_-616_X-Men_Vol_2_118_p9_f4_ /revision/latest?cb=20051026191413"Link/a

Here is an image of Darth Simi; she has clothes of Typhoid Mary but with a kickass trench coat and double yellow lightsabers. She's from Legends/EU and was a Zabrak Sith priestess that lived thousands of years in her prime because she sacrificed young Jedi to keep up her immortality; I figured that she must have her own private temple to do this with curses in place to punish any looky-loos: a href=" . /revision/latest?cb=20101029204547"Link/a

I decided I wanted to write this short piece, so I can get out of my head. At first, Hux was going to get de-aged and have his memory to be only of his child memories, but I thought it was more amusing to have them both de-aged and keeping all their memories. After they got drunk and sober, they probably went on an adventure that they wanted to go as children.