Casey vs. Basic Training
Casey stepped into the room and surveyed the new recruits. They were a sorry lot, slouched against the walls or half sliding out of the chairs. By the looks of their greasy faces, not one of them was a day over sixteen. It seemed like the kids they sent him were getting younger and dumber every year. He sighed inwardly. There was nothing for it, he'd just have to whip them into shape and hope for the best. The future of his beloved country was at stake after all.
One of the kids was leaning back, balancing his chair on two legs. Casey walked over and kicked the chair out from under the kid, catching him neatly before he could hit the floor. He hauled the kid up onto his feet.
"ATTENTION!" he barked in his most commanding and intimidating voice. The other recruits stared at him wide eyed and unmoving. He began to move around the room, pulling two more kids up by their collars before the rest started moving. "Stand up straight! Tuck in your shirt! Did your mother forget to dress you this morning?"
Finally, they were all standing shoulder to shoulder in a more or less straight line. Casey paced up and down the room a few times to make them sweat before coming to a stop in front of them and crossing his arms over his chest.
"Welcome to Buy More Employee Training. I'll be your instructor..."