Author's Note: I don't own anything. I seriously don't know what I was thinking writing this. LOL!
Summary: How Maleficent met her pet crow. Contains strong language.
Once upon a time, a very long time ago there was a wicked fairy named Maleficent. She was the mistress of all evil. She was so evil that she put the evil in evil. She was as evil as evilness could be evil. Evil had a name. Maleficent. Evil Maleficent. Mistress of evil.
She was alone in this cold cruel world. All alone and completely evil. Her own three sisters had kicked her out of the house for being way to evil. She hated those bitches. She hated them with all of her evil heart. She hated them with a firey evil passion. Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather. They had betrayed her. They left her in the dust. They left her to suffer.
They never included her in anything. Perhaps that is why she was so evil. The mistress of evil. Was it too much to ask for a fucking hug every once in a while? Was it too much to ask if maybe they would engage in dark magic? Maybe if she had been hugged more she wouldn't be so fucking evil either. She swore one day she would take revenge.
She wandered around the forest for days and destroyed anything that came her way. Her excuse for doing all of this? "I'm the mistress of evil!"
She suddenly came across a nest and she saw a bunch of crows. There was a little fat one that stared at her. "Join me you motherfucker! I'm the mistress of evil!"
The bird flew to her and Maleficent flipped off the other birds. "That's right bitches, I'm the mistress of evil."
So the mistress of evil walked away and she had herself a friend. The crow was the only one who understood the evilness of the evil Maleficent. Her evilness rubbed off of him and he became evil. He became the sidekick of motherfucking evil.