Lost in Thought
She
curls up on her bed with her head between her knees.
Her head
pumps in a steady rhythm (thump, thump) as the thoughts
assault her mercilessly.
Their claws scratch and draw black,
oozing blood from the recesses of her mind (thump, thump).
She
doesn't want them, doesn't want to hear them (thump, thump),
but she just can't seem to bring herself to stop their flow.
What
they think, their view of her, of others, it is horrible. A sob is
forced out of her and it tears at her tiny frame (thump, thump).
Max's confusion over everything is a maze that cannot be
navigated. Her hatred for the school is a fire that never ends and
never destroys, just burns unbearably, scalding for eternity (thump,
thump).
Iggy's malice towards his parents is unending. But
the real reason that he came back, his darkest, deepest secret, is
bright and fresh in his mind at all times. Notions of love and
betrayal are two things, she is learning, that often go together.
They tempt him into insanity (thump, thump).
Gazzy's
jealousy, his resentment of her superior powers, is a deafening ring
in his mind and hers (thump, thump).
Nudge's hopelessness,
her need for parents and dissatisfaction with the flock poisons
everything she does (thump).
And Fang, when Fang thinks
about Max... Angel blushes and recedes deeper into herself; she is
never sure whether she feels disgust or pleasure when she intercepts
the vivid pictures that he creates (thump).
It never
stopped (thump).
For an instant she is lost among thoughts
and feelings, unsure which are hers and which she just borrowed.
She
panics and tries to quickly sort through the selves that inhabit her
mind (thump, thump, thump).
Her heart speeds up. Which one
is she? Which one is truly her?
(Thump, thump)
She is
ambushed and drowning. Hate, lust, anger, love, desperation, they all
flow into her lungs, their tentacles slither down her throat as she
chokes on their presence (thump).
This is the adult world,
this is what it is made of, and she cannot swim through it (thump).
She listens intently, holding her breath so that no more can
come in, she follows the rhythm (thump, thump).
Blind and
lost she makes her way back. Repressing her panic she walks, the
steady pump of her mind guides her (thump, thump).
She
finds it (thump), herself.
She hugs it to her chest
(thump, thump) and refuses to let go.
She must stay brave;
like the flock, like Max.
If only she could still believe that
they were truly strong.
(Thump)
AN: This is my first Maximum Ride fanfiction, so be as harsh as you want with constructive criticism.
I just always thought that Angel would have to have a hard time dealing with having all of those adult thoughts in her head.
Please review! Pretty please! I'll give you e-cookies. :D
