A/N: I wrote this fic about a year ago. I had a lot of Coke and cheese curls, it was 1 o'clock in the morning when I wrote this so its kinda insane. Well...enjoy!
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The Owlery
By: PeaceSign
Harry was in Gryffindor Common Room with Ron and Hermione playing a game of exploding
snap when Hedwig swooped in. She dropped a note on Harry's lap it said:
Harry-
Come to the Owlery tomorrow after Divination. Come alone.
Harry reread the note over and over again in his head. Who would want to meet him
secretly?
The next day after Divination Harry went to the Owlery. It was empty except for the owls
and someone sitting it a chair by the window. To his great surprise Cho was there.
Cho what did you want to meet here for?" Harry asked. He could feel himself go red.
"I wanted to ask you something," she said smiling.
"Anything," Harry said calmly.
"How did you find out about the Sorcerer's Stone?" Cho said.
"What? That was ages ago! How did you-" but Harry stopped. Looked Cho in the eyes and
started to tell her everything that happened to him, Ron, and Hermione at Hogwarts.
She would say things like, "You were so brave" Harry went redder and redder as he spoke.
After about an hour Harry finished telling Cho about everything.
"Harry"
"Yes Cho"
"What do you think of Professor Snape?"
"Snape! I hate him! Who doesn't? That idiot is always taking points from Gryfinndor, and he
really needs to wash his hair, really why doesn't he make a hair cleaning solution or
something? And his nose is enormous. How could Dumbledore ever trust an idiot like him?!"
Harry said this very fast.
" Oh really" said an icy voice in his ear. Harry saw Snape sitting where Cho was. He was
grinning evilly. "Well Potter you're going to be expelled!"
NOOOOOOOOO" Sirius stormed in through the window with a dementor. The dementor
kissed Snape.
"Sirius how did you get here? And where did u get that dementor?" Harry asked stunned.
"Her name is Prudence. She's my pet." Sirius said proudly. "What were you doing
Harry telling Snape all that stuff! I heard the whole thing!"
"He used polyjuice potion" Harry said stunned at the sight of Snape. Ron and Hermione
appeared in the middle of the room with Harry's invisibility cloak.
"We followed you here after Divination. You left your note in our dormitory." Ron said.
"Harry how could you tell Cho all our secrets!" Hermione
"It's not my fault she's sexy," Harry said. Instead of scowling Hermione gave him a smile
identical to Cho's.
"Do you think I'm sexy?" she said.
"I do! I do!" said Ron impatiently.
"Ron I wasn't asking you!" Hermione snapped. Then she said in a quiet gentle voice "I was
asking Harry" Just as Hermione looked at Harry affectionately Fred and George came
bursting in.
"Hey you love birds we heard the whole thing too!" George said.
"Fred, George what are you doing here?" Ron said very annoyed.
"We were going to put dung in your slippers but found Harry's note." Fred explained.
"While we're on the subject" came a voice everyone looked up. Sitting on a large owl perch
was Dumbledore.
"Isn't it so cool too be an animagus Sirius! I can transform into an owl!" he said happily.
"I can't stand this! IF THERE IS ANYONE ELSE HERE COME OUT OR I'LL HEX YOU!!!" Harry
yelled. A cat with markings around her eyes walked to them from the other side of the
room. Then it transformed into Professor McGonnigall.
"Professor you were here too!" Hermione said stunned.
"Eavesdropping is a hobby of mine. By the way Granger, I'd get your cat fixed. It finds me
attractive." She said stiffly. A rat crawled across the room. Hedwig swooped down and
dropped it on Sirius' chest.
"Peter" Sirius muttered. Then he threw him out the window and giggled childishly. There
was a swishing noise heard outside. Everyone looked out the window. Remus Lupin flew
into the window with Harry's Firebolt and Petigrew.
"Padfoot what were you doing throwing Peter out the window!?"
"Ever seen a rat fly Remus?"
"Padfoot you idiot what if Peter landed on someone? Try explaining flying rats"
"Rats flew in Askaban once"
"Sirius that's not the point what would u do if a rat fell on your head?"
"I'd eat it. I'm quite used to rats by now"
"Padfoot normal people don't eat rats"
"So I do. They taste like chicken"
"The point is that if a person had been walking into the castle"
"What kind of idiot walks into the castle at this hour?"
"Sirius will you stop interrupting me. If a person got hit with a rat they would come here
and investigate"
"Why would they come here?"
"Because that person would know that rats don't fly and this is the only open window for
several yards"
"How do you know that they know that rats don't fly?"
"It's common sense Padfoot"
"I wish rats flew on Snape"
"Are you guys done talking about flying rats?" Harry asked annoyed. "Moony how did you
get my Firebolt and get here so fast?"
"I don't know" Lupin said curiously. At that moment two very heavy people fell to the floor.
It was Crabbe and Goyle. They lied there unconscious from the fall.
"Vincent, Gregory where did you guys go I'm about to fall!" came a cold drawling voice of
Draco Malfoy. At that moment he fell. Malfoy landed on Goyle and looked up at Sirius Black
screamed and yelled, "HELP!!! HELP!!! SIRIUS BLACK!!!" then fainted.
"That was strange" Ron said. Something was moving in the corner. It was Snape.
"Snape I thought my dementor kissed you!" said Sirius in frustration.
"She did kiss me Black. Prudence kisses me all the time she's my girlfriend."
"What about me Severus! I thought I was your girl! You've
been dating me and that disgusting dementor! I hate you Severus!" McGonnigal screamed.
Then she burst into tears. Hermione tried to comfort her.
"Prudence is my girl. That's her name, Mrs. Prudence Black"
"Prudence how dare you flirt with me when your married! Don't you want to be called
Prudence Snape!"
"Prudence Snape sounds like a cereal old people eat." Harry thought.
"Severus your fired." Dumbledore said lazily.
"WHAT!!! Headmaster you can't fire me just like that!!!" Snape yelled in shock.
"Yes I can!" Dumbledore said childishly.
"Why!?"
"Because I'm the headmaster and your not na na na na na nah!!!" Dumbledore sang. He
stuck out his tongue at Snape.
"I don't need you wa ha ha!!! I'm going to my master He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. I will
be treated much better!!!" Then he ran out of the owlery laughing like a madman.
"PARTY IN THE COMMON ROOM!!!" Fred and George said. Everyone left.
THE END
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A/N: Hope you liked it . Its not supposed to be based on what would really happen or anything. I'd love to hear your opinion on this fic so I can improve it. I'll read and review your fic(s) if its PG-13 or lower and if you review :) thanx a million! ~PeaceSign
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The Owlery
By: PeaceSign
Harry was in Gryffindor Common Room with Ron and Hermione playing a game of exploding
snap when Hedwig swooped in. She dropped a note on Harry's lap it said:
Harry-
Come to the Owlery tomorrow after Divination. Come alone.
Harry reread the note over and over again in his head. Who would want to meet him
secretly?
The next day after Divination Harry went to the Owlery. It was empty except for the owls
and someone sitting it a chair by the window. To his great surprise Cho was there.
Cho what did you want to meet here for?" Harry asked. He could feel himself go red.
"I wanted to ask you something," she said smiling.
"Anything," Harry said calmly.
"How did you find out about the Sorcerer's Stone?" Cho said.
"What? That was ages ago! How did you-" but Harry stopped. Looked Cho in the eyes and
started to tell her everything that happened to him, Ron, and Hermione at Hogwarts.
She would say things like, "You were so brave" Harry went redder and redder as he spoke.
After about an hour Harry finished telling Cho about everything.
"Harry"
"Yes Cho"
"What do you think of Professor Snape?"
"Snape! I hate him! Who doesn't? That idiot is always taking points from Gryfinndor, and he
really needs to wash his hair, really why doesn't he make a hair cleaning solution or
something? And his nose is enormous. How could Dumbledore ever trust an idiot like him?!"
Harry said this very fast.
" Oh really" said an icy voice in his ear. Harry saw Snape sitting where Cho was. He was
grinning evilly. "Well Potter you're going to be expelled!"
NOOOOOOOOO" Sirius stormed in through the window with a dementor. The dementor
kissed Snape.
"Sirius how did you get here? And where did u get that dementor?" Harry asked stunned.
"Her name is Prudence. She's my pet." Sirius said proudly. "What were you doing
Harry telling Snape all that stuff! I heard the whole thing!"
"He used polyjuice potion" Harry said stunned at the sight of Snape. Ron and Hermione
appeared in the middle of the room with Harry's invisibility cloak.
"We followed you here after Divination. You left your note in our dormitory." Ron said.
"Harry how could you tell Cho all our secrets!" Hermione
"It's not my fault she's sexy," Harry said. Instead of scowling Hermione gave him a smile
identical to Cho's.
"Do you think I'm sexy?" she said.
"I do! I do!" said Ron impatiently.
"Ron I wasn't asking you!" Hermione snapped. Then she said in a quiet gentle voice "I was
asking Harry" Just as Hermione looked at Harry affectionately Fred and George came
bursting in.
"Hey you love birds we heard the whole thing too!" George said.
"Fred, George what are you doing here?" Ron said very annoyed.
"We were going to put dung in your slippers but found Harry's note." Fred explained.
"While we're on the subject" came a voice everyone looked up. Sitting on a large owl perch
was Dumbledore.
"Isn't it so cool too be an animagus Sirius! I can transform into an owl!" he said happily.
"I can't stand this! IF THERE IS ANYONE ELSE HERE COME OUT OR I'LL HEX YOU!!!" Harry
yelled. A cat with markings around her eyes walked to them from the other side of the
room. Then it transformed into Professor McGonnigall.
"Professor you were here too!" Hermione said stunned.
"Eavesdropping is a hobby of mine. By the way Granger, I'd get your cat fixed. It finds me
attractive." She said stiffly. A rat crawled across the room. Hedwig swooped down and
dropped it on Sirius' chest.
"Peter" Sirius muttered. Then he threw him out the window and giggled childishly. There
was a swishing noise heard outside. Everyone looked out the window. Remus Lupin flew
into the window with Harry's Firebolt and Petigrew.
"Padfoot what were you doing throwing Peter out the window!?"
"Ever seen a rat fly Remus?"
"Padfoot you idiot what if Peter landed on someone? Try explaining flying rats"
"Rats flew in Askaban once"
"Sirius that's not the point what would u do if a rat fell on your head?"
"I'd eat it. I'm quite used to rats by now"
"Padfoot normal people don't eat rats"
"So I do. They taste like chicken"
"The point is that if a person had been walking into the castle"
"What kind of idiot walks into the castle at this hour?"
"Sirius will you stop interrupting me. If a person got hit with a rat they would come here
and investigate"
"Why would they come here?"
"Because that person would know that rats don't fly and this is the only open window for
several yards"
"How do you know that they know that rats don't fly?"
"It's common sense Padfoot"
"I wish rats flew on Snape"
"Are you guys done talking about flying rats?" Harry asked annoyed. "Moony how did you
get my Firebolt and get here so fast?"
"I don't know" Lupin said curiously. At that moment two very heavy people fell to the floor.
It was Crabbe and Goyle. They lied there unconscious from the fall.
"Vincent, Gregory where did you guys go I'm about to fall!" came a cold drawling voice of
Draco Malfoy. At that moment he fell. Malfoy landed on Goyle and looked up at Sirius Black
screamed and yelled, "HELP!!! HELP!!! SIRIUS BLACK!!!" then fainted.
"That was strange" Ron said. Something was moving in the corner. It was Snape.
"Snape I thought my dementor kissed you!" said Sirius in frustration.
"She did kiss me Black. Prudence kisses me all the time she's my girlfriend."
"What about me Severus! I thought I was your girl! You've
been dating me and that disgusting dementor! I hate you Severus!" McGonnigal screamed.
Then she burst into tears. Hermione tried to comfort her.
"Prudence is my girl. That's her name, Mrs. Prudence Black"
"Prudence how dare you flirt with me when your married! Don't you want to be called
Prudence Snape!"
"Prudence Snape sounds like a cereal old people eat." Harry thought.
"Severus your fired." Dumbledore said lazily.
"WHAT!!! Headmaster you can't fire me just like that!!!" Snape yelled in shock.
"Yes I can!" Dumbledore said childishly.
"Why!?"
"Because I'm the headmaster and your not na na na na na nah!!!" Dumbledore sang. He
stuck out his tongue at Snape.
"I don't need you wa ha ha!!! I'm going to my master He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. I will
be treated much better!!!" Then he ran out of the owlery laughing like a madman.
"PARTY IN THE COMMON ROOM!!!" Fred and George said. Everyone left.
THE END
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A/N: Hope you liked it . Its not supposed to be based on what would really happen or anything. I'd love to hear your opinion on this fic so I can improve it. I'll read and review your fic(s) if its PG-13 or lower and if you review :) thanx a million! ~PeaceSign