AN: It was originally longer but, ya know, I got busy. Had to cut it off. Still, it's long enough to break in half and make you wait for the second part. So thats fun. But, anyway, enjoy reading the proof of Ryan's hatred. She made me kill my own otp. Needless to say, we are no longer friends.

Just kidding, Ryan.

-Jess

I almost left the day that Harry called me Daddy; almost walked right out the door and never came back. I would not, never could, replace James Potter.

It's funny because when we were in school we were practically interchangeable. You never heard one name without the other. After first year my name became JamesAndSirius or SiriusAndJames. And then we graduated and my name got shortened to Just Sirius. And James became LilyAndJames. Which was fine. I mean, they grow up too fast, sure, but I was happy for my best mate. Then his name changed again. I was still Just Sirius and he was Daddy. And the little guy that gave him that name became the center of all of our universes. Seriously, the whole world revolved around this tiny creature that blew spit bubbles and wanted nothing more in the world than to chew on his own toes. James took on his new name like he had been waiting for it his entire life. He was the best Daddy that I knew.

So I couldn't take that from him. It had only been a year since James died and I was not ready to hear that. I would have left-I wanted to-if Lily had stayed. But Lily froze and then she ran like she always did.

I sighed loudly and scooped up a now fussy Harry from his high chair.

"I know you mean well kid but its just not a good time time to throw out the D word," I said, ruffling his hair and setting him down in his play pen with enough toys to keep him busy for a few years.

It wasn't hard to find Lily after the fact. She hid in the same place every time she was upset. For the first month or so she spent more time there than anywhere else.

James's office still looked exactly like it had the last time he had rummaged around in it. Honestly it was probably the only place that had not changed in the least. If things were up to Lily, the entire house would be exactly the same and ready for her husband's return but life kept moving around us. Harry did not allow anything to sit still for long periods of time.

"Lils, come out. You know he doesn't understand what he is saying," I said softly from just outside the door. That was the unspoken agreement that we had come to when she finally realized that I wasn't going to leave: we could talk, scream, fight, laugh, pretend that nothing was wrong, but I was not to enter her hideaway. Besides, she almost always came out on her own eventually.

If Lily Potter needed to surround herself with his things to mourn properly, who was I to judge? After all, I did the same thing but with his child. That sounds fucked up, doesn't it? Well guess what, it's a fucked up situation. The whole thing is fucked up and there is not a damn thing that any of us can do about it.

"We knew it would happen, Sirius," She stated, voice flat and defeated, "In another year he will have forgotten all about James. James loved him more than anything and he won't ever know him. He'll be happy with this broken family but he will never see that this is not how it was supposed to be," her voice level steadily rose until she was on the brink of hysteria.

I sighed and leaned my forehead on the door, "You're right about one thing: Harry will be happy. But everything else is impossible. How could you ever think that Harry won't know James? Don't you know that I will make sure that he knows everything about my best friend, that you would never let him go through life without knowing his father? Harry doesn't know right now because he is far too young to understand what is going on and I am glad for it. I am glad that Harry does not have to feel the pain of losing the person that you love most in this world."

Silence followed then scrambling footsteps and a click of a lock.

Lily stood in front of me a second later with a wild look in her eyes.

"Promise me, Sirius Orion Black, that you will always love him. Promise that you will tell him everything about James because I know I never could and that, if anything ever happens to me, you will care for him like he is your own child."

"I swear, Lily. I will do everything in my power to take care of Harry."

She looked thoughtful and then shook her head, "No, that's not enough. One day he'll look like James, and I mean really look like James. One day you will look at him and you will see your best friend. But he needs you, Sirius. He thinks of you as a father, which is how James would have wanted it, but that will only make things that much worse if you walk out. It has been an open invitation for the last year-you have known that you could leave whenever you want-but now that time has passed."

"I am not going anywhere, Lily, and you know that. Harry is my family. What do I have to do to convince you of this?"

Her eyes took on a sort of steely determination, "I want you to make the Unbreakable Vow."

AN: Dun dun dunnn! Standby for the next chapter. I'll post it in a couple days. Love you guys!