Not in that Way
Inspired by the same song by Sam Smith.
Disclaimer: The song and all characters mentioned do not belong to me.
And I hate to say that I love you
When it's so hard for me
He walked with heavy feet and a heavy heart into the church. His palms were sweaty, and even breathing was a struggle.
She was standing alone in the lobby, peaking at her invited guests through a small crack in the door.
She had always looked amazing to him, but today, she took his breath away.
She was wearing a strapless, sweetheart neck wedding gown that had a natural waist, and was skin tight until the knee, where it burst into a bountiful mermaid skirt with layers upon layers of ruffles. It had a beaded belt at the waist, that matched the same floral motif of her earrings and bracelets. Her hair had big curls, and was swept into a neat half updo, with the bottom portion cascading down her back like a platinum waterfall. Completing her angelic do was a gorgeous halo of cosmos blossoms that her mother made for her at the flower shop. Her eyes seemed to sparkle with excitement, and the blue in them were brought out by a light dusting of champagne eye shadow and a thick frame of black eye lashes. Her cheeks had a simple peach blush, one that matched the color of her lipstick. Standing there, she seemed to radiate an aura of pure divinity.
It was an image that was permanently engraved into his memory.
"Chouji! There you are!" She exclaimed.
"Ino...you look..."
"Like a big fat snow beast?"
"No...You look beautiful"he sighed, holding back the tears that started to form in his eyes.
"Thank you." She smiled, staring into his thin chestnut eyes. "Do you think Sai will like how I look?" She asked nervously. She twirled slowly to show him her whole ensemble, the layers of ruffles seemed to dance as she turned.
And I hate to say that I want you when you make it so clear that you don't want me
"Well it isn't black, and it isn't a crop top. Plus he's weird...so I'm not sure..." He said, half joking.
She playfully gave him a smack and glared at him through squinted eyes.
"Come on, I'm serious!"
"Ok, ok! Of course he'll love how you look! Come on Ino, did you even look at yourself today? There's no way that he wouldn't think you look gorgeous"
She shook her head and blushed. "Choji, I can't thank you enough for doing this." She stressed, placing her bouquet on the ground so she could squeeze both of his hands. "It's so hard not having my dad here to today..." She confessed as tears rolled down her cheeks. "Im so glad that I at least have you to give me away."
"Hey, no sad tears! Only happy ones today!" He exclaimed, causing her to let out a small laugh. He broke one of his hands free to wipe away her tears, and let his hand linger there.
"Ino... I have to tell you something"
I hate to say I need you
He had loved her since they were five years old. It started out as a little crush, but through all their years at the academy and as team mates, it metamorphosed into full fledged love.
He had wanted to tell her how he adored her sense of humor, how he would have gladly given his life for hers on any of their missions, how much he wanted to kiss her on a regular basis, how he loved the way her face lit up when she made floral arrangements, or how he loved the way her voice got high pitched when getting excited about something. He longed to tell her how much he liked watching her play with her chopsticks at the Korean barbecue after she finished her meal, or how much he loved the cute angry faces she made as shed charge at him in training, or how awesome she looked on the battlefield, or pretty much how she always looked like an angel. How he thought she was perfect, inside and out. How he had wanted to share a life with her and start a family with her, and spend the rest of his life making her happy.
I'm so reliant , I'm so dependent, I'm such a fool
He tried to tell her before the Chunin exams, after the Chunin exams, When she came to visit him at the hospital with a basket of fruit just for him, after defeating Hidan and Kakuzu, after the war ended, after he was her shoulder to cry on at her fathers funeral, while he slow danced with her at Shikamaru and Temari's wedding, and again when she confided her feelings for Sai to him. More recently, he wanted to tell her when she took him out to lunch and asked him to walk her down the aisle. It just never seemed to be the right time. To add to the list of failed attempts, He wanted to tell her right before he was going to give her away to the man of her dreams.
When you're not there I find myself singing the blues
He got lost in his emotions, and although he searched for inspiration in her big blues eyes, he couldn't seem to find the words.
"Yeah chouji? Are you ok? Your hands are trembling..."
"Yeah, I'm fine..." He muttered.
"I just wanted to tell you that you are the most beautiful bride that I have ever seen, and I don't think I'll ever see one more beautiful than you. I'm sure your dad can see you now...and he's probably crying his eyes out"
Her peach colored lips curled into a a smile, and her eyes twinkled with joy at that thought. "I sure do hope so"
He admired her beauty as he held her face in his hands. "I love you so much Ino, and I always will" he said with a cracking voice, kissing her on the forehead and pulling her into a tight embrace.
"Awww, and I'll always love you! You better stop crying too! Jeez, And I thought Shikamaru was a crybaby!" She laughed, hugging him tightly. Of course she didn't mean it in the same way though, and it stabbed violently at Chouji's heart.
Can't bear...
The same obnoxious little girl that used to torture him about his weight blossomed into an extraordinary young woman, one who had managed to bewitch every fiber of his being. Holding her tight in his embrace, He breathed in her familiar scent of fresh cut flowers, and For the tiniest moment it wasn't true. She didn't love Sai. She was Chouji Akimichi's magnificent bride. He would have given up anything to have been able to hold her in his arms forever.
"Are you ready, Princess?" He asked, offering her his arm, and mustering up the biggest smile he could manage.
She looked at him and nodded , flashing one of her perfect smiles.
A simple variation of Cannon in d was playing, but he couldn't hear it. Surrounding them were the many faces of their comrades from the village, but he couldn't see any them. The whole situation was a big, agonizing blur. All he could make out was the wonderful woman on his arm, and the pain he could feel as his entire world crumbled around him.
Can't face the truth
He didn't know how long it took to walk down that aisle. It could have been hours, minutes, seconds. Heck, it could've been days. Either way, time seemed to stand still in her beautiful presence.
Suddenly they stopped, breaking Chouji from his daze.
You will never know that feeling,
There he was.
The handsome groom. He looked tall and statuesque in his Black suit and bow tie.
Sai, who was usually emotionless, was trembling with anticipation. The most sincere, toothy smile was spread across his face, and tears of joy were falling slowing from his eyes as he admired his beautiful bride.
"Hi Ino." he choked "You look wonderful"
"Hi Sai!" She laughed lovingly. His awkward nature was adorable to her, and she giggled at almost everything that came out of his mouth. "So do you! I'm pleased to see that you covered your stomach today."
"
You will never see through these eyes...
Chouji watched in sadness as the beautiful happy couple looked at each other with the same kind of admiration that he had for Ino.
Is this really it?
"Who gives these two permission to marry?" Asked the priest
He took a deep breath and sighed.
"I do."
She looked at him with her godly eyes that broke whatever was left of his heart. Gently unhooking his arm from hers, he put her delicate hand in his, and brought it up to his lips, placing a warm kiss on it.
Slowly dying on the inside, he carefully placed Ino's hand in Sai's, and took a seat next to Shikamaru. His friend put a hand of comfort on his shoulder for support, knowing how hard it must have been for him. After all, he witnessed Chouji's struggle to win Ino's affections first hand.
"It's going to be ok man. I promise." He whispered. "There's a hot girl out there who's dying to cook for you"
That caused Chouji to chuckle quietly.
"Trust me. And even if there isn't, that's fine too. Wives are a real drag. Either way, It's going to be ok, and you'll feel better before you know it."
"Thanks Shikamaru" he knew his friend sincerely wanted to help, but nothing could heal his broken heart at the moment.
I'd never ask you cause deep down I'm certain I'd know what you'd say...
Before he knew it, his attention was brought back to the ceremony.
"Is there anyone here who objects to this union?"
This is it. Say something Chouji!
Earlier, he had every intention of stopping the wedding and confessing to her. He just needed the push of the actual ceremony to drive him over the edge. to whip him into shape, to make him be brave. Even on the battlefield, he needed a push.
Was this any different?
As he watched the happy couple smile and cry together, he couldn't help but feel his dream to be with Ino slip away. The visions he had of himself standing across from her at the alter seemed a little silly. The talented little shinobi he imagined having with her suddenly became harder to envision. The many places he would have taken her to, the many memories they would make, and the life they could have shared disappeared. All those times he could have sworn she might have loved him back seemed highly unlikely.
Dammit! Just stand up! You're about to lose her forever!
He could have stood up right then and objected, and and tried to win her over. He could have declared that Sai could never love her like he could, and that she would know she was always beautiful in his eyes. He would have carried her out of that church, and protected her and loved her for all of eternity...
But seeing the complete joy she had in her eyes stopped him.
There was no brilliant vision or realization. The only push he was feeling was the one telling him to just let her go.
You found love. I may not be your soul mate, but you are certainly mine. You are incredible, and I don't think you could even begin to understand how much you've changed my life. Congratulations Ino. I wish you and Sai all the happiness in the world. You deserve it. Just know that I'll always be here for you...you'll always have a place in my heart...
You'd say I'm sorry, believe me I love you...
He couldn't be that kind of guy.
It wasn't that kind of wedding.
It wasn't that kind of love story.
...I will always love you.
...But not in that way.
Authors note:
Hey guys! So This is my first attempt at angst and my first attempt at a song fic. Upon reading chapter 700 of naruto, i can honestly say that it hurt a lot to see that chouji and ino didn't end up together. I mean sure, they're both happy...but not as happy as they could have been, in my opinion. I had the concept since then for a one-shot about Chouji having to give Ino away at her wedding, and i didn't really plan on adding a song to it. The other day though, i was listening to "Not In That Way" By Sam Smith and thought it would be great to add to this concept.
I guess this is an attempt to make peace with the ending...kinda.
I'm still working on better than chips though! ill have another chapter of that out shortly! Also, I'm planning many other naruto fanfics, that of course involve choino!
I hope you all liked it. please read and review! i need help with my writing and i want to get better lol