From Time I Realized
By: NikNaks
It has been seven years after she collected the fifty-three "Clow cards" and turned them all into her own. Our world is finally at peace. No disturbances. No weird phenomena. It was a normal seven years. I went back to Hong-Kong with Meirin to continue our studies. I promised her that I wouldn't forget her. I promised to come back one day. I promised to wait for her, I did. But time has passed. It did in seven years. Even if you tried so hard to wait, eventually, you will just end up giving up.
Seven years has passed quickly. I was told that she became a singer shortly after her fifteenth birthday. Her best friend Tomoyo insisted her. Soon, she became famous in all of Japan. I was surprised. Sometimes I watch her music video and came to think.
"Her smile is different now." I said to myself. I quitted training martial arts. It doesn't really matter now because there are no "Clow cards" to fight. I developed a hobby on photography. Meirin told me that it was weird for me. But I found comfort while taking pictures. Trees, flowers, and even the clouds, I like taking their pictures and looking at them from time to time. I grew a few inches tall. My brown hair was now straight and was kind of neat, not when I was still a kid. I'm not so muscular, but with my past training, I somehow am. This is me now. And that is her.
It has been seven years. But I still haven't forgotten….
Card Captor Sakura Opening theme:
It's all right daijoubu daijoubu daijoubu
Kisekiteatewokuseeru
Here we go hikouyo hikouyo hikouyo Tsuzekidologe
Kiito nanikaga nanikaga dokokaga teteri iuwa seeru
Do! Do! Do! Dreaming! Dreaming!
Soshite doubinaga hirakuyo…
It was getting hot. It was an obvious sign that it was spring again here in Hong-Kong. Cherry blossoms are everywhere. Scattering their leaves gently on the ground. I always take pictures of those trees, even if I saw them everyday. Why? It always reminds me of someone. Her.
"You need to relax a bit." Meirin said as we walked. But I can't relax. I'm always stressed in spring. I don't really know why. It made my mood so dark. And to make it worse, I have to participate in the next photo exhibit in our school. It's next autumn but it was important for me and to all other photographers. I really need to win. I hate to lose.
Meirin had insisted me on going to a cherry blossom field near the lake. She said that it would make me calm. But it just made me think of her more. Her smile, her hair, and her laugh. I missed all that. Even if it was on TV, I knew that all of her has changed. She's another girl. Not her anymore.
There were so many people by the lakeside. It was Saturday so it was normal. You can see children running from every place, families eating their lunch while laughing their hearts out, and couples enjoying their free time together. And to top it off, leaves of the cherry blossoms fell endlessly. It was a nice view to see, but it just wasn't enough to make my day go well. "Pose there." I told Meirin and pointed a big tree. She was always my model. She grew beautiful and with a great body, probably because of her martial arts training. She was always the one who was being courted. But I always beat them up. I don't want just any guy to be close with my cousin.
Our engagement was cancelled seven years ago. You ask me why? You know the answer.
"Really? Why?" We both asked curiously. We were suggested to take a summer vacation in Japan. We agreed right away, of course. After seven years, I will finally go back there. To the place were parts of my memories still lingered. "You will finally see Sakura-Chan again!" Meirin told me cheerfully as she hugged me excitedly. I was happy too but, it just made me more stressed in each passing day. It made a heavy load on my shoulders. It made me think of here every single day.
"Is she still waiting?" "Would she still remember me?" "Who is this guy that was rumored to be her boyfriend?" Those thoughts got stuck on my head. It made my heart ache. It was like being hammered over and over again. It made my confidence lower. But, should I trust her? She did promise me, right? I have to believe. I wanted to believe.
Summer came at last. My heart kept beating hard as days went by. I was nervous. More nervous than when I fought with the "Clow cards".
"Relax Syaoran, relax." Mei said and tapped my shoulder. It was a hot summer day. We were on the plane but it was hot. It was so hot that I sweat.
"Shut up." I told her and looked at the window. I think I made her mad. Forget it. She's always like that. But at least, I know that Meirin still hasn't changed. After grueling minutes of sweating and hard heart pumping, we finally arrived at the airport. We were going to stay on our renovated house. It looked different. Even the houses beside it were quite different.
"Let's go see Sakura-Chan and Tomoyo-Chan!" Mei excitedly said and held my hand. I quickly let go of it and said: "I don't want to. You go." I said arrogantly and went out of the house. "Kill joy!" She shouted at me. I sighed and continued to walk.
It changed. The roads, the trees, and even the park with the blue penguin had changed. I took photos of it for souvenir. I then looked at a large billboard on the nearby building. "You are really famous." I said and walked away. It was a picture of her in a boutique endorsement. I got bored of taking pictures so I sat on a bench. A cherry blossom leaf fell on my lap. I held it on the tip of my fingers. "I'm afraid to see you again. I'm afraid to know the truth. I'm afraid to know that you didn't wait for me. I hope that I won't see you again." I told the innocent leaf.
"Syaoran!" A voice beyond the small, nearby bridge had shouted. I looked for the person who called me. But deep inside me I knew to whom that voice belonged to. Deep inside me I was expecting that voice. I longed for that voice. Her voice. She ran towards me swiftly, and hugged me as soon as she reached me. I was pretty surprised. But my heart was glad. My dream came true. My childhood love, in my arms again. I was forced to blush. She held and looked at my hands. After that, her face became sad for some reason. Regrettably, some dreams do turn to nightmares.
"Is that Syaoran? The childhood friend that you were talking about?" She released her arms over me and went to him. That guy, the one who was rumored to be her boyfriend. She held his hand, tightly if I might say. He's another singer, just like her. If I can remember well, this bastard's name is Bem. I glared at him as he talks. "I wonder if I can kill him now?" I said to myself, holding my usual orb that turns into a sword with a few chanting.
I suddenly realized, the girl I loved before was gone…
"Ouch!" Screamed another voice from afar. I looked and saw Meirin, together with Tomoyo, in the direction where she came earlier. Tomoyo waved at me and smiled as usual. Soon after that, we went to their mansion. The Daidouji residence. All of them talked about our past. Reminiscing what had happened. But not including the " Card Captor" part so that Bem wouldn't know. Though angry and sad, I tried my very best to not let it show. I don't want to spoil this "Reunion". But suddenly, Bem told us how he and her had met. How and why he fell in love with her. And how he and her are now. He's so much my opposite! He can express his feelings towards her directly with no shyness. I can see her blushing from what her noisy "boyfriend" had said. I can't take it anymore. I can feel my hands shaking in annoyance. Even Meirin's tap in the back wasn't enough to contain my grief. I can't relax!
It has been twenty minutes already! Why can't he stop talking? If I have my magic papers here I swear that I will burn his mouth. I can't take it anymore. Will someone shut him up? It's my girl that he's talking about! At least, she 'was' my girl. But our promise? Where did it go? "I waited…" I whispered. He suddenly stopped talking, at last! I stood up, and faced the door. "I have to go." I said arrogantly as possible. It made her stand up as well. "Why so sudden? We still haven't talked much." She said. I started to walk a bit, turned the doorknob, but whispered again.
"The more I talk to you, the more I realize that you're not her."
I closed the door as soon as I came outside. But I still stood there to hear what they were about to say. "He hasn't changed at all." The voice of Tomoyo said. "You bet." Meirin replied. "I don't get it." She said. Then I started to walk. "You always don't." I said as I walked. I left them with more grief and sadness than when I missed her for seven years. It was painful. My world was being torn apart. I hated myself for doing nothing. I found myself, walking endlessly through the city. It, too, had changed a lot. I have so many thoughts up in my mind but still I can notice how things had changed. And then, I bumped into someone.
"Oh I'm sorry." I said and bowed in respect. "Li-kun?" The man said. I stared at his face for a while, and suddenly noticed who this man is. I felt this tingling feeling again. I can feel my blood rising to my face. I always feel this when this man is near. It was him, Yukito-kun.
"Hi." I greeted stupidly and bowed again. After that, we went to a nearby café. He insisted on treating me, since it was long since we saw each other. He seemed very happy to se me, and that made me blush more. Yukito-kun was more handsome now. His hair was trimmed neatly and stylishly. And he was more masculine that before. All the girls in the café stared at him but he doesn't seem to notice. "Have you visited Sakura-chan?" He asked me after drinking his hot coffee. I just nodded. It was weird because I'm always shy in front of him. As I looked at his face I suddenly realized that he knew what I am feeling right now.
"You have to understand her, Li-kun. It has been seven years. I know that you are hurt but not everyone is as noble as you, Li-kun. Sakura-chan needed someone to love her in your place." He explained. I know. Somehow, I understood what she felt. But it was unfair for me. But what is fair, anyway?
"Oh, since we met here, I might as well give you this. It was given to Yuweh by Sakura-chan." Yukito explained and handed me a long, pink envelope. 'Li-kun, please read.' Was written in front. "Sakura-chan might have forgotten that she gave that to me four years ago." Yukito-kun said. I opened the envelope, and inside was a "Clow card". It was 'The Seal' card. "This card!" I shouted out of my surprise.
This was the last card that she had caught. It was said that the "Clow cards" had positive energy. But 'The Seal' card had negative energy to balance the flow of energy. Clow Reed created it to balance the powers of his cards. He said that the power of the 52 "Clow cards" is equal to the power of one 'The Seal' card. It's power? Incredible. You can make a big space disappear into thin air when you used that. No matter how powerful you are, you can't escape. But it comes with a prize. You have to sacrifice a thing, or a person. The more important that thing is, the greater the space that the card will make disappear.
It's so powerful that it shouldn't be used…
When she caught this card, she told me what she really felt. She told me that she loved me. It was the greatest day of my life, even if I fell from a Ferris wheel earlier back then. Still, when she hugged and was glad that I survived, made my pains go away. I placed the card on the table with the envelope and started to read the letter. Some parts of the letter were wet when it was written. From tears, maybe?
Dear Li-Kun,
Hi. How is life now? Are you doing well? How is Meirin? To tell you the truth, I wrote this on my birthday. I'm thirteen on this day Li-Kun. I was expecting that you will come, but you didn't. I was so sad. But I understand. You have your own life now. But I thought, even a phone call was enough for me. I just wanted to be with you in any way. Sorry for bragging you. After this letter, I will start my own life as well. A life without you, Li-Kun. I promise to be strong like you. I waited for you, but I guess that you didn't wait for me. Well, I still thank you, Li-Kun, because, you were my first love. By the time you are reading this, it would mean that you met Yukito-Kun somewhere in about ten years. Even if it is that long, I want to tell you that I love you Li Syaoran. And you will still have a part of my heart with you. Good-bye Li-Kun. Until next time.
That card is yours now. I am giving this to you because it was really your presence back there that gave me the strength to capture that card. And in case my cards get out of hand, I want you to stop them for me. Thank you.
Always here,
Sakura
"So stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!" I said over and over again and crumpled the letter. I, then picked up the card and ran to back to Tomoyo's house. I looked back and saw Yukito-kun waving at me. I waved also and continued my run.
I arrived at Tomoyo's house. They were not there! The maid told me that they went to a theme park. I quickly left the mansion. I know where that theme park is. It was the park where she caught the last card. The park where my happiest memories were. These made me feel more stupid. "This is my fault! All my fault!" I shouted as I jump from house to house. I arrived at the theme park. It was bigger than before. There were so many people there. With this entire people, how can I find her? I looked around, over and over but still I haven't found her, or her friends.
"Arrogant boy!" A voice from somewhere shouted. That small voice came from someone familiar. "Keroberos?" I asked, trying to find his location. "In the bushes." He said. I walked there, and saw him, eating a piece of cake. He's her guardian, the sun god Keroberos. "So its' really you arrogant boy! You grew taller! So, is the noisy girl here also?" He asked me. "Stupid cat. Yes, Meirin is also here. By the way, why are you here, you cat?" I asked annoyingly. That made him to stop eating. "Oh no! I forgot! Come on boy! Let's find Sakura-Chan right away!" Kero shouted and flew away.
I followed him as quickly as I could. After a few minutes of flying, he came down. I went to the place and saw her with Tomoyo and Meirin beside the Ferris wheel ride. "Sakura-Chan! I have something very important to tell you!" Kero shouted and glided. "Kero-chan! What are you doing here?" She shouted surprisingly and pushed Kero in her bag. She looked around to see if anyone had noticed.
"Hi Li-kun." Tomoyo greeted. Meirin greeted me as well. She, she was busy arguing with Keroberos. "Hi. Where's Bem?" I asked them. I hope that he was stock in the horror booth. "He's in his taping right now." Mei whispered and blinked at me. "What were you saying, Kero-Chan?" She asked the worried Keroberos. We drew closer to them, expecting shocking news, from "Clow cards", maybe. "We ran out of sugar in the house." Kero explained. For a few seconds, there was a moment of silence. A wind breezed.
"WHAT? THAT WAS ALL THAT YOU GOT TO SAY? WE WERE WORRIED BACK THERE!" Meirin shouted at Kero. "Don't you dare shout at me you noisy girl! It is very important!" Kero shouted back. They were shouting at each other for a while. Tomoyo went near me. "You see, Li-kun? Not everything has changed." She told me and smiled as sweetly as before. I stared at her cute face. Tomoyo, too, hasn't change a lot. Only her physical body has changed. She was still calm and simple. After a few noisy minutes, they both calmed down. Then, "An idea!" Mei shouted and pointed at me.
She unexpectedly punched Keroberos inside the bag and snatched it from her. Then, she pushed her and me in the Ferris wheel. "Hey! What are you doing?" I asked Meirin nervously but it was too late. The wheel had moved. "See you later." Mei and Tomoyo both said and waved at us. We both looked at each other, and blushed. We sat separately, trying to avoid each other's eyes. Seven years ago, Meirin also did this to us. She insisted us on riding together. That time, this girl in front of me was just a kid. She wanted to tell me her feelings but the right words didn't come up. She tried to spill her feelings for me but the ride was finished even before she can talk. I, too, was very shy back then. But today, I don't feel like being quiet anymore.
"Are you happy? Uhm… With him, I mean." I said to her. She looked at me and saw that I wasn't looking at her. "I am." She said. That made me want to fall from our position. That made me realize that she does love him. "Oh." I continued. Then, she came to talk. I was not surprised anymore. The shy girl that I met was long gone. I came to understand that by now. "How about you? Do you have a girlfriend now?" She asked me. I looked at her brown eyes and said: "I don't. And I never had. Stupid."
For some reason, that made her confused. That made her to ask me the question "Why?". I sighed. At least one thing remained constant in her attitude. She was always 'clueless'. At least, a part of the girl I loved was still there.
"I promised to wait for you, remember?" I told her. I refused to look at her because I was afraid to be rejected by her. I was preparing for what she would tell me but it didn't came. Then, unexpectedly, there was an earthquake. It was a bit mild, but that made her scared. "What happened?" She told me in her shaky voice. "I don't know." I told her. We soon realized that we were holding hands. We blushed and went back to our normal position. The wheel had finished rotating. The announcer told us that there was a minor earthquake and advised us to be careful. We both went out silently and slowly. Tomoyo and Meirin weren't there to wait for us. "Where are they?" She asked curiously. I also didn't know. I tried to look for them but they weren't in sight. "Come one. Let's look for them." I said and walked with her. We were quiet as we walked. Maybe she wasn't up for a chat with me.
"Let's rest for a while, can we?" She asked me. I think she's tired from all the walking. We sat on a free bench. We weren't sitting close. Was it me or was it her who is shy? Maybe it's both… We sat on the bench for a few minutes. Then a crowd had formed in front of her. I was startled and jumped from my seat. Then I realized that she was a famous singer. There were so many that took her autograph. And posed for her pictures. I, too, wished for a picture with her. I wanted to remember her with me. But I understood that I couldn't be with her now. I'm not blind to see that she's happy with Bem. It hurts me but I was now willing to let her go. I can see the smile that she gave me when we were kids. That smile that was so sweet it made me blush like a tomato. I can see that her sweet, soothing smile belongs to her boyfriend now, not me. The earth shook again. This time, the people went nervous and ran through the exit.
"We should go too before it the earth shakes again." I told her. She said yes. I didn't want to walk side-by-side with her so I walked a few paces before her. "I'm sorry." She told me as we walked. Sorry? That's all that she can say! After what she did? But I can't blame her. She, too, didn't know. There were only a few people left on the park. I walked a little faster to increase our distance. I felt cold for her. I was mad. Then, the earth shook again! And this time, it was stronger than the last time! I looked at her and saw that she went out of balance and sat on the floor. I looked above her and saw the Ferris wheel was about to fall! "Look out!" I told her frustratingly. She looked above that made her eyes bigger. It was about to fall on her. I was in shock that I can't even move. "No!" I shouted with all my voice. I can't let her die! I won't forgive myself if she died and I can't do anything! How can I live if she was to die?
A feather fell in front of me from nowhere. Then I saw that time had stopped. "What's happening?" I asked myself. Then someone fell in front of me. I saw it's big, white wings and his long, silver hair. He faced me and I suddenly realized that it was Yuweh, the half of her guardians. He was in pain, and had placed his hands together. He was sweating for some reason. "Li-kun! Quick! Do something to save Sakura-chan! Hurry before I faint from tiredness!" He shouted. I looked at her and saw that the Ferris wheel was just an inch from her head, so even if I ran to her, I can't save her. "Quick Li-kun! Do something!" Yuweh shouted again. What can I do! Think Li! Think! "Use me." A cold voice said. Then something in my pocket flew off. It went in front of me in a glowing form. It was the "Clow card" that she gave me. 'The seal' card. Yes! I can make the wheel disappear with this card! "Tell me, what would I sacrifice to make you disappear that Ferris wheel? I would sacrifice anything! Just make that wheel disappear right now!" I shouted at the card as she glowed. "Li-kun!" Yuweh shouted in a painful voice. His spell was about to wear off. "Your life. Give me your life." The card told me in her icy voice.
"If it's my life that you want, then take it!" I shouted at her. I took out the orb from my pocket and transformed it into a sword. The card went to normal and glided to my hand. "I will save you!" I shouted with confidence and threw and card into the air. "Spirit of the card, lend me your outmost power. I, Li Syaoran, order you! Release!" I chanted with bravery and had thrust my sword unto the card. It glowed again and it formed a figure of a girl with long hair. She raised her right hand slowly to where the wheel is and snapped her fingers. Then, a black hole appeared and swallowed the Ferris wheel completely. And about time, Yuweh's spell was broken. Time returned to normal. "That card." She said as she saw me with the "Clow card". "Yuweh! What happened to the Ferris wheel! Li-kun! Did you use 'The Seal' card?" She asked us in both curiosity and fright. She knew what would happen when you use the card's power. She shed to tears as she saw me smile. "You're safe." I told her. My sight suddenly got blurred. I can't move my body in any way. Is this it, he feeling of dying? God, I didn't had the chance to say I love her. The final sight that I saw was her running towards me. Good-bye.
End…
"No! It can't be! It's not the end! I won't let it end this way! I can't leave her alone! I can't just give up like that! I will return!" I shouted. I found myself in the middle of nowhere. It was dark and blank. I can't see anything. I tried to walk but I end up nowhere. It was still the same. I went crazy. I didn't know what to do. I shouted and shouted but I can't hear my own voice! Where am I! Please, where are you? Can anyone hear me? Oh please, no! But suddenly, I felt a wet feeling beside my left cheek. I can't remember myself crying, so where did this come from? A voice? Where is it coming from? "Hello! Can anyone hear me? Please answer!" I shouted and looked all over for that single voice. Then, from my heart, a big, white flash came! Everything went white. I tried to open my eyes but I can't see. It was very bright. Then, the voice grew louder. That voice. It was crying. It's her! She's crying! Open up you stupid eyes! She's crying!
With all my might, I opened my eyes. Slowly and painfully, I did with all my might. It was very bright but I saw a figure. It was a face with brown hair. "Please… Wake up… Li-kun! Please don't leave me… Please, open your eyes… I can't live without you… Please…" She said. She can't see that my eyes are open because her hands covered her eyes. I slowly raised my hand and gently put in on her wet cheek. She was shocked. She held my lifted hand and looked at me happily. She tried to find the words that she wanted to say but she said nothing. She just stared back at me as she still cried. I smiled at her gently. "Sakura, I love you." I said with all my feelings. I never had said that to anyone. It was especially for her. Then, my sight blurred again. I can't feel my body. Again, it became dark…
"Li-kun! Li-kun!" She shouted as she saw me without conscience. Meirin and the others went inside to check on me. She cried again, a lot louder now…
"Wow. So that's how your mind works! You're weird. Very weird, Li-kun." She told me and smiled as she leaned her head on my shoulder. "Shut up." I told her and blushed. We were watching the orb from my sword. It seems that it recorded my thoughts from all those times. Huh? You're wandering why I'm still alive? Don't be like that! Of course I won't die! (Laughing out loud.) When I ordered 'The seal' card to release her power, I cast a spell on myself to leave a part of my life unto another body. Astral projection? Yes, I think so. It's a good thing Yuweh and my spirit waves are connected.
Oh, so that's why I always get a weird feeling when I'm near Yukito. I have the same wave as his. Well, that's what happened. I just got tired so I fainted back there. Sorry if I spoiled the romantic scene! But don't worry. "You're talking to yourself again?" She asked me. It has been seven years. Seven years after we got together again. But today I'm not alone. I have her with me. "Mommy! Daddy!" Our daughter greeted. She and her aunt Meirin bought groceries for us. "Hey kid! Give me some of those! Please!" Keroberos begged as he saw our daughter with lollipop. "Nope! Buy some yourself! p" She told him. The two of them ran all over the house. I was happy to see them happy. I'm glad that I have her in my arms. And I promise that I will forever cherish her and protect her. "See Li-kun. It has been so many years now, but still, not everything has changed." Tomoyo said. I looked at her and smiled. "Yes. I guess no one can change this…"
End!
Another fan fiction finished! Please tell me your comments! It would be a great confidence booster! Thanks!
NikNaks