Saying Goodbye is Never Easy.
Don't own, just borrowing. The song is called Call Me by Shinedown. I don't own it either it just inspired this story. So if u know it, I'd recommend playing it as you read.
She sat at the bar swirling her fingers in her drink. Watching as the ice cube spun lazily in the glass. She felt like shit and knew she must look just as bad. He was gone, her best friend, he'd transferred to a school in New York. To be closer to his family. And his doctors since it he was sick. And getting worse. That had been hard to take, and they had both cried over his leaving. Tears rolled down her cheeks at the memory of the last time she'd seen him.
*~*~*~*~* Flashback.*~*~*~*~*
"Jess, it's Amy." his sister greeted sadness in her voice.
"Hey, Amy, what's wrong?" she asked now worried.
"It's Joe, he's asking for you, the doctors say he's got a week left." silence filled the line as Amy tried to hold in her sobs. Jessica dropped the phone. Sitting on her bed, glad her room mate had gone out for the night. Silently praying for strength, she picked the phone back up,
"Amy, you still there?" she asked holding in tears.
"Yeah."
"I'll be there tomorrow. As soon as I can. I'll call you when I'm at the hospital." she said as the first tears fell.
"Ok, I'll see you tomorrow then." and she'd hung up with out another word. Jessica Mills stared at her phone then called her English class project partner. She hated to bail on him but, Joe needed her and she'd never forgive herself if he died before she'd said goodbye.
"Hey, Jess, What's up?" the smooth voice of Caleb Danvers asked.
"Can you meet me in the library, now." she said as the tears chocked her voice.
"Sure, you ok, Jessabell?" Caleb's use of Joe's nickname for her made her throat constrict tighter. She wanted to say she was fine but, Caleb would know if she lied.
"No." she said voice breaking.
"I am not ok, never mind the library just get here." she cried. The sobs came freely as the last of her restraint caved.
"Ok, I'll be there soon." and the phone clicked but she was crying too hard to notice. Getting up she unlocked her door and curled up on her bed. Sobbing freely letting it out now so she could be strong tomorrow. That was how Caleb found her fifteen minutes later. He'd been good friends with Joe before he moved back home, though he had not known how sick Joe was. None of their school friends did, Joe didn't want them to pity him so he never told anyone. She felt the bed dip under Caleb's weight as he sat down beside her. Knowing Joe would probably want to say goodbye to him, she crawled into his lap. Once there she couldn't stop the outpour of words.
"He's dying Caleb. Amy, his sister, she called me. He's been asking for me, she said the doctors told him he had a week left. So I have to go see him. Tomorrow I'm leaving that's why I called you. To let you know cause I don't wanna abandon you on our project. But I need to go, I'll never forgive myself if I don't say goodbye to him." she stopped talking for a minute, only to realize that Caleb hadn't known he was sick. She started talking again before he could process what she'd already said.
"Oh, my God, Cay I'm so sorry. I forgot you didn't know. Please don't be mad he liked you, you were the closest thing to a brother he ever had. He just didn't want you to treat him differently, that's why he didn't tell you. And he forbid me too after he left." I finished speaking but remained perched on Cay's lap. Still crying, as I waited for him to say something.
"Can I go with you?" he asked quietly. Not what I had been expecting and before I could answer Amy called me back. I put the phone on speaker.
"We just talked to the doctor, and his latest tests indicate he won't last the night. How soon can you be here?" she said as soon as I answered, not even giving me a chance to speak. The breathless tone told me she was speaking between sobs.
"I can be there in about 6 hours. I have someone here who wants to say goodbye, can he come with me?" I ask noting the look on Cay's face.
"Is it Caleb Danvers?" she asks, her tone still sad but no longer breathless.
"Yes, as a matter of fact it is. He was like Joe's best friend here." I tell her. I'd gotten up to get the phone but, I notice his eyes are shining with unshed tears so I resume my perch in his lap.
"Bring him, then and I'll see you soon." and with that the phone clicks again.
*~*~*~*~*Present*~*~*~*~*
We arrived at the hospital three hours later. I had thought we were going to drive but when I got off the phone, Caleb was on his phone getting us on the next flight to New York. I didn't bother arguing with him about it. I slept on the plane, exhaustion had won. I called Amy once we were on the ground again. She'd told us she'd meet us in the main entrance. Grabbing Cay's hand, I let him lead me through the revolving doors and right into Amy and Justina. Joe's older sisters, both had tear stained faces but their brother was dying and I knew I probably did too. They'd hugged me tightly, but I refused to let them drag me away from Caleb's side. We made introductions as we boarded the elevator to the fifth floor. But I kept my body between Cay and Justina, I'd known Joe long enough to know that his second oldest sister was a whore. He'd told me all of the times through the years that she'd played men for whatever she wanted. Only to dump them as soon as she got it. I knew the Danvers name would go far, and judging by the look in her eye she knew exactly who Caleb was. And she all she saw were dollar signs. I decided to make it clear now that he would be off limits to her, if only to save me from having to knock her out later. I really didn't need her starting anything now, especially with Joe dying I wasn't in the mood.
"One warning is all I will give you, Justina, jailbait." Surprisingly Amy spoke before I did, and just as the doors opened. Apparently she'd caught her sisters' appraising look.
"Second door on your left. He's the only one in the room." Amy directed at us as we reached the waiting room. That clearly held the rest of the Morgan family. Caleb made to stay and let me go first, but I shook my head, and cast a glance at Justina who was despite Amy's warning staring at him. Great I'd have to knock her out anyway. I walked into the room ahead of him and was by the bed as Joe opened his eyes and looked first at me then at Cay.
"Hey, Jessie, you're here. Amy said you were coming but I didn't think it's be so quick. And Caleb too, wow I feel special." he coughed as he finished. Paler then I had ever seen him, a yellowish tint to his normally clear blue eyes. He motioned for Caleb to come closer.
"Can I get a minute with Cay, I've missed him." he asks as he coughs some more.
"Ok, have him come get me when your done." I squeeze his hand and walk away, patting the other boy's shoulder as I leave the room.
*~*~*~*~* Caleb's POV*~*~*~*~*
"Hey man, how you been?" he asks. He shakes my hand and I can tell he's close as he grip is weak. A coughing fit grips him and it takes him a few minutes to get his breath back to speak. I hold out the glass of water to him and he takes it, sips and coughs.
"I been okay. School and swim keep me busy. Graduations in a couple weeks and I got accepted to Harvard." he smiles, happy for me
Well, congratulations, I'll bet that makes your mom happy. How's Sarah?" I pause surprised he knew, Jess must have told him.
"Oh, she left. Went back to Boston." I say not wanting to dwell on the sore subject.
"Oh I'm sorry, man, Jess didn't tell me that. I gotta apologize to you."
"No you don't, I understand why you didn't say anything."
"But still, you and Tyler were my best friends. And I should have told you sooner. I hate to ask this but can you do me a favor."
"Sure, anything." I reply as he coughs some more.
"Take care of Jessica for me. She means the world to me, and I know she'll need somebody to look out for her when I'm gone. And she likes you, so please take care of her." he doubles over coughing so hard. I see blood on the tissue as he holds it to his mouth.
"Sure. I'll take care of her, as much as she'll let me." I say once he stops coughing and regains his breath, but I can see how hard it's getting for him.
"Thanks, it was good seeing you again, Cal." he smiles.
"Can you get Jess now, please?" I nod and walk out as he coughs more and harder then before. The end is near for him, I can tell, though that he waited for us and it cost him. Jess is in the hallway sitting on the floor across from the door. She looks up at me. I can see the tears in her eyes and know my own eyes are glittering. I help her up from her position,
"He wants to see you. He waited for us." she nods at me and walks into the room. I take her former position on the floor and let my tears fall.
*~*~*~*~* Jessie's POV*~*~*~*~*
I look up from my seat on the floor to see Caleb standing over me. His chocolate eyes are filled with tears. Holding out his hand, I take it and let him help me to my feet.
"He wants to see you. He waited for us." his voice is cracking. I nod at him and walk into the room. I know this will be the last time I talk to Joe. He smiles at me when he stops coughing. He pats the bed beside him and I take the invitation. This will be the last time I lay with him, I just know it. He's so much paler now then he was when Cay and I first got here and he's coughing more. He can hardly catch his breath.
"My Jessabell." his voice is rough from coughing so much. I hate that nickname but since he thought of it, I let him get away with using it.
"Call me a sinner, call me a saint. Tell me it's over, I'll still love you the same. Call me your favorite, call me the worst. Tell me it's over, I don't want you to hurt." he says softly. Singing the words to our favorite song. It fits this moment so perfectly.
"It's all that I can say, so I'll be on my way." he finish's his part of the song. The next words we sing together,
"Finally put it all together. Nothing really lasts forever. I had to make a choice that was not mine. Had to say goodbye for the last time. Kept my whole life in a suitcase, never really stayed in one place." we skip part of the song and repeat the chorus together. Then I sing,
"I'll always keep you inside, you healed my heart and my life. You know I tried. Call me a sinner, call me a saint. Tell me it's over, I'll still love you the same. Call me your favorite, call me the worst. Tell me it's over, I don't want you to hurt." I finish and we take turns repeating the closing lines,
"I'll be on my way." we finish as a violent coughing fit overtakes him.
"I'll be on my way now, Jess always remember I love you." He sighs and his eyes close.
"I will. I love you too, Joe." I kiss his cheek and he breathes his last. Getting up slowly, I kiss his cheek one last time before walking out of the room. Caleb has taken my spot on the floor in the hallway. He looks up when he sees my shadow over him. He stands up and before I can process his movement, he closes the space between us. I can no longer form words, just cry into his chest.
"He's gone Cay. He's gone." I manage to say between sobs. The rest of the family is drawn to the hallway by the sounds of my crying.
*~*~*~*~* 2 days Later*~*~*~*~*
I stood in the cemetery, between Caleb and Tyler. He came up yesterday after Caleb had called to let him know of Joe's passing. The preacher is talking but I can't tear my attention away from the polished oak coffin long enough to listen. The rest his family is on either side of us. Amy's consoling her parents as best she can. Justina stands off by herself a few feet away. I have to smile a bit when I see she couldn't completely cover her black eye. After Joe died she tried to play Caleb for sympathy. Her parents told her to have some decency, and let him mourn for his friend without her clinging on him. She hadn't listened so I'd punched her. She had a fit, tried to get me banned from the funeral but his parents and Amy wouldn't hear it. They told her she deserved it and she could have gotten worse. She'd let it drop after that but every once in a while she'd toss me a dirty look. The looks would turn nasty whenever she spied his arm around me. And even now as she saw Caleb's arm twine it's way around my waist, and Tyler take hold of my hand as we consoled each other, she shot me a venomous look. My attention was drawn to the preacher as he spoke again,
"It's time now to lower the coffin so if you could in a single file line place your roses on the lid. Pay your last respects, then the family is holding a wake back at their home." We waited till the family had all gone which didn't take long as his family only consisted of ten people. Plus the three of us made thirteen. Smallest funeral I have ever been to. Tyler went first, lying the light blue rose on the lid, he whispered,
"Rest in peace." he walked a small distance away as Caleb went next.
"Rest in peace, I'll miss you." and he too laid his rose on the lid. I went last,
"You'll always have a piece of my heart. I love you, and I'll always miss you. Rest in peace till the day comes when we meet again." I whispered as tears fell and my rose joined theirs. I let my hand linger on the lid after I put the rose down. Then with a final goodbye, I went to join Cay and Ty. Arm and arm we walked, lost in comfortable silence, to Tyler's black Hummer.