It was the night before Christmas/Jashinmas for the Akatsuki and they were all lounging in the warm living room in a peaceful atmosphere.

What they didn't know, was that it was time for a bedtime story….

Itachi plopped on the couch with a book announcing, "Everyone gather around." Safe to say they were all confused. Kisame asked, "Why Itachi?" "I'm going to read a story."

Hidan snorted, "No fucking way I'm wasting my time listening to some kiddie fairy tale."

His small lover scowled at him and made him sit back down, "Trust me Hidan, you'll like this one. Itachi and I altered it with all of us as the characters."

Tobi giggled, "Really Olivee?" Zetsu arched a brow, "Interesting. What story is this?" The raven smiled softly, "A Christmas Carol."

"IT'S JASHINMAS!"

Deidara rolled his eyes, "Get over it Hidan, you and Olivia are the only ones who refer the holiday to that but the rest of us don't un."

Madara snapped, "Stop bickering you two! I'm actually looking forward to hearing this." Kakuzu shook his head, "I'm not." Sasori agreed, "It's depressing." "What's it about?"

Itachi glanced at his lover, "You don't know Kisame?" "Of course not, you know I don't care for reading." Hidan nodded, "We're shinobi, we don't have fucking time for that crap."

Olivia growled, "Whatever, who here does not know what the story is about?" Hidan, Kisame, Deidara, and even Tobi raised their hands.

Itachi chuckled, "I'm surprised but at any rate, just listen to it. There's a valuable lesson to learn."

Kisame leaned over, "It's not boring is it?" Lexy patted him on the thigh as Madara grinned, "On the contrary, it's rather frightening in a way with a man that almost corrupted his soul for eternity."

Hidan's interest went up, "Really? This guy was damned?"

Olivia nodded, "Yep, and there's spirits too." Deidara smirked, "Hmm, rather intriguing un." Itachi sighed, "May I begin now please."

Finally agreeing, they made themselves comfortable and listened as the raven began reading.

Lexy had her head in Kisame's lap, Deidara was leaning back against Sasori, Hidan had his feet propped up on Kakuzu's lap, Zetsu was craddling Tobi on the loveseat, and Itachi was relaxed on the couch with Olivia next to him, slightly leaning against Madara who rather liked it.

Marley was dead: to begin with. As dead as a door-nail.

"That's what I'm fucking talking about. Death already started!"

Kakuzu smacked his lover upside the head, "Be silent and let him read." The jashinist grumbled a few curse words but didn't utter a sound afterward.

In life, Hidan Marley was a business partner of the greedy moneylender named Kakuzu Scrooge. He was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone; a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old-sinner.

The miser scowled like no tomorrow as most of them chuckled at him. Zetsu grinned, "Perfect choice to be Scrooge."

Hidan nodded, "Yeah but why am I the dead partner? I can't fucking die so I should be the ghost of death."

Olivia gapped, "I thought you didn't know the story." "I don't, that's the only fucking part I heard about."

Itachi sighed, "We chose you as Marley because you are his partner in life Hidan, so please keep quiet."

He sat busy in his counting-house, which was cold and bleak as the bitter weather outside. He only had a small fire, but his clerk's was even smaller than his own.

Wherefore, the clerk tried to warm his hands over the candle, in which effort, not being a man of strong imagination, he failed.

It wasn't long before he received a visit from his merry nephew, who left with still merry words despite the harsh ones from his uncle.

Then soon came two well dressed gentlemen, pleasant to behold, and now stood, with their hats off in Scrooge's office. They had books and paper in their hands and bows to him.

"Scrooge and Marley's I believe," said one of the gentleman, referring to his list. "Have I the pleasure of addressing Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley?"

"Mr. Marley died seven years ago this very night," replied Scrooge.

"We have no doubt his liberality is well represented by his surviving partner," said the same gentleman with glossy ebony hair.

At the omibous word 'liberality' Scrooge frowned and shook his head, handing the credentials back.

The other one spoke, namely a rather tall fellow with beady eyes and a hint of blue to his tresses, picked up a pen, "At this festive season of the year Mr. Scrooge it is more than usually desirable for the Poor and destitute, who suffer greatly at the present time. They are in desperate need of common necessaries and comforts sir."

Kisame shifted on the spot, being careful not to pull the teen's hair and asked, "Is that supposed to be you and I Itachi?" His lover nodded, "Yes, we are the two gentleman that come seeking donations for the poor."

The shark was content and resumed stroking the brunette's hair gently as the raven continued.

The dispute between the three men wasn't pretty, rather harsh words being spoken by the greedy miser. The ebony haired gentleman was appalled, "Many can't go there; and many would rather die."

Scrooge retorted, "If they would rather die then had better do it, and decrease this surplus population. Good afternoon gentleman!"

Seeing clearly it would be useless to pursue their point, the two gentlemen withdrew.

Itachi continued reading beautifully; drawing the lot in with his alluring voice and it grew even more ominous when his partner arrived.

Hidan was giddy and on the edge of his seat; ready to hear how his character was.

Scrooge recognized the ghost to be his deceased partner. The same face: the very same. Hidan Marley with his slicked back platinum hair, usual waistcoat, tights, and boots.

The only difference was his body was transparent and the chain he drew was clasped around his middle. It was long and wound about him like a tail; and made of cash boxes, keys, padlocks, ledgers, deeds, and heavy pursues wrought in steel.

He felt a chilling influence of its death-cold eyes, no longer the amethyst shade they once were. "What do you want with me?"

"Much!" "Who are you?" "Ask me who I fucking was?" "Who were you then?"

"In life I was your partner, Hidan Marley." Scrooge asked him to sit down, which he did, but still doubted his presence and the phantom knew he did.

"You don't believe in me?" "I don't."

"What fucking evidence do you have of my reality beyond that of your senses? Why do you fucking doubt your senses old man?"

"Don't criticize me Hidan, you always did that to me! As for your question, if could be anything. A bit of undigested beef, a crumb of cheese, there's more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are."

Their talk was short and brief until Hidan let out a loud dismal wail about his accursed life, Kakuzu asking whilst trembling from this frightful phantom.

"You are fetter, tell me why?"

"I wear the chain that I forged in life. I made this link by link, yard by fucking yard and of my own free will. Or would you know, that you wear such a chain yourself; a fucking ponderous chain."

Scrooge didn't see no chain but was fearful none the less. "Speak comfort to me Hidan."

The ghost replied, "I have none to give. Not to know that no space of regret can make amends for one life's opportunity misused. Yet such was I! Oh such was I!"

"But you were always a good man of business Hidan," faltered Scrooge, who now began to apply this to himself.

Hidan cried out, rattling his chains, "BUSINESS! MANKIND WAS MY FUCKING BUSINESS!" Once he calmed down he murmured, "I suffer most this time of the rolling year. Hear me! My time is nearly gone."

Scrooge replied, "I will, but don't be hard upon me! Don't be flowery Hidan! Pray!"

His former partner tilted his head, "How is it that I appear before you in shape that you can see? I may not tell, I have sat invisible beside you many and many a day."

It was not an agreeable idea and it made Kakuzu shiver, wiping the perspiration from his brow.

"That is no light part of my penance. I am here to-night to warn you, that you have yet a chance and hope of escaping my fate. A chance and hope of my procuring, Kakuzu."

"You were always a good friend to me. Thank'ee."

"You will be haunted by Three Spirits, without their visits you cannot hope to shun the path I tread. Expect the first to-morrow, when the bell tolls one and then second the next hour, then the third will appear in his own good time."

Hidan stood from the chair as the window raised itself, "Look to me no more; and look that, for your own sake, you remember what has passed between us!"

With that said, the specter floated out among the bleak, dark night.

Kakuzu closing the window behind him, not uttering a single word or sound from the emotion he had undergone, or the fatigues of the day, or his dull conversation with the ghost, or the latest in the hour.

In need of repose, he went straight to bed without undressing, and fell asleep upon the instant.

Itachi stopped there for the time being, "Let's take a small break shall we?"

Hidan was grinning like crazy and muttered, "I was fucking awesome!"

Lexy sat up, "I'm going to make some hot chocolate, does anyone want any?" There was a chorus of "I DO!" and she smirked, "Come on Olivia, help me with this will you?" "Ok."

"Tobi want lots of marshmallows!" "Me too un!" Even Kakuzu was in on it, "You know how I like mine angel."

His lover blushed from her rarely used nickname that only he calls her and glanced at him with a smile.

Kisame stretched his legs as Zetsu smirked, "I wonder who my character is?"

Madara chuckled, "I don't care as long as I'm in it."

TBC: Next chapter going to be the first 2 spirits!

I did quote almost word for word from A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens but like I said, it's revised and shortened otherwise it would be way too long lol.

Review and let me know what you think!

Cast:

Ebenezer Scrooge = Kakuzu

Two gentleman who came for donations = Itachi and Kisame

Jacob Marley's Ghost = Hidan