Careless Sunrays
It's over, all over
"I'm sorry Edward." She said
I was frozen, like a tower of stone in front of her. This couldn't be happening, there is no way she could be dumping me. This was the woman I wanted to spend my life with, have a home and children with and now all of a sudden she didn't want me.
"What do you mean?
"It just isn't right anymore? There's something missing-"
"Is it the sex? Or something I do? Cause I can change Tanya." I babbled, flaying my arms around helplessly. However, the relationship I was trying to save seemed to have already sunk.
"Edward, it's not you it's me."
"BULLSHIT!" I shouted.
For Christ's sake what was she talking about? A few months ago we were talking about getting married and trying for kids, now she wants to split. NO!
"Edward, I'm in a difficult place in my life right now, I have no idea what I want to do or be....I just think it would be better if we had some time apart from each other. I'm sorry." she said calmly.
She got up from the chair and went into our bedroom...our bedroom, leaving me sitting by myself speechless. This couldn't be happening, my angel could not possibly be leaving me. She came out with a suitcase. Great, she's already packed and ready. That means that she had thought about this beforehand.
"I see you're already packed then." I said flatly, looking away from her. I couldn't look at her right now. I thought my heart was going to smash my body to bits with the pain it was feeling. I felt my knuckles start to ache where I had been clenching them so tightly through her little speech.
"Yes, well I've been thinking about this for a while now. I'll be back to collect my things tomorrow morning, if that's alright with you?
"Do what you want." I said quietly.
"Goodbye Edward."
She bent down and gave me a light kiss on the cheek. I winced at it, feeling every shard of my broken heart flying to that spot.
I stayed motionless even after I heard the door click shut. I breathed deeply, trying to calm myself. I looked around the room, everything seemed to symbolize her. The throw pillows she had chosen, the curtains we had spent weeks arguing over. I felt a tear slip to the corner of my eye. I brushed it away crossly. I stayed in that chair for god knows how long. The phone ringing made me snap out of my trance. I looked at it and slowly, like every movement was an effort.
"Hello?" I said softly down the phone not realizing how horse my voice sounded.
"Edward my man, you ok? Look, we're down at Liquid and we wondered if you wanted to come hang out. Bring Tanya too; we've got some good looking ladies to introduce you to." My best friend Emmett yelled down the phone
I winced again just at the mention of that angel's name.
"Tanya and I broke up." I said bluntly.
"Oh man. What! What happened? Everything was going great wasn't it? I mean you were smitten." I was obviously on speaker phone as Jasper's voice, my other best friend, floated down the phone.
"I was. She apparently wasn't. She said she needed to figure out who she was and what she wanted."
"God, man! How about you come out and get hammered with us?"
"For God sakes Emmett, I doubt he wants to be out now, after a break up!" I heard Jasper scold.
"No" I said, suddenly wanting desperately to leave the ghosts that she had left behind "I'll come"
I hung up before they could say any more. I quickly changed into a clean shirt, but stopped dead when I saw a red lipstick lying on top of the chest of draws. Tanya. I couldn't go out just after a break up. I sat down on the bed and heard a crinkle from under the covers. I shoved my hand under the covers and pulled out a pair of hot pink panties. Fuck Me. She only wore these the other day, the day we had the most mind blowing sex EVER. I let the sobs that I had been previously holding back, out. I sat there for about half an hour, until all the held in tension had left my body. I swallowed a few times and quickly changed my shirt. Tonight I wanted to forget. I wanted to forget Tanya, I wanted to forget everything she had said to me tonight, I wanted to forget all about the time and love that we had. I grabbed my keys and wallet and jumped in the car. While driving to the club, I thought over everything that had ever been said and done between Tanya and I. Admittedly, I had been a bit busy at work making me a bit stressed and short with her sometimes, but that had never made her leave before. We had had our ups and downs like any normal couple who are in a relationship....that was it. She was having an affair, which was why she needed to dump me; she was running off with someone else. I let my mind run rampant for the rest of the journey but reminded myself when I arrived at the club that I was here to forget about Tanya not dwell on her. That relationship was over, even if it had been complete a few hours earlier.
When I entered the club, I was hailed by Jasper and Emmett who both had pretty girls perched on their knee.
"Hey guys" I said, sitting down quietly. The girl on Jasper's knee was playing with the collar of his shirt and Jasper was looking adoringly into her face. Emmett however had his tongue stuck halfway down the girl on his knees throat. He introduced me to his girl when he pulled away for air.
"Edward this is Rosalie" Emmett said waggling his eyebrows.
"Nice to meet you" She said giving me a firm handshake. She was beautiful, I had to give her that.
"And this is Alice" Jasper said, already looking at the tiny pixie girl sitting on his lap like she was some rare jewel.
"Nice to meet you, Edward" she replied her bell like voice piercing the load rhythm of the music.
"Hey baby, want to dance?" she asked turning back to Jasper.
"Sure" He grinned, looking at me as if he needed my permission. I nodded and he happily got up. I had never seen Jasper be so willing to dance before. Normally, the poor girl had to drag him on to the floor. He really must be head over heels. I turned back to Emmett who was making out like a teenager with Rosalie straddling him once again.
"Hey Em, I'm gonna get a drink" I said. He gave me a thumb up behind Rosalie's back. I walked over to the bar and ordered a double shot of tequila. I drank while watching Jasper and Alice grind away on the dance floor. I laughed to myself, Jasper was definitely in love. That kid fell so easily. I ordered another drink and then another. I felt my head start to spin but could not rein my drinking spirit back in especially in my current condition. I turned to my left and saw a pretty girl sitting by herself playing with the straw in her drink. I had a couple more drinks and began to lose all sense of time, as well as my inhibitions. I seem to remember talking to the girl sometime through the night and being pulled on to the dance floor. However, I don't remember anything after that. It just all went black.