Summary: Gray really hates college parties. Really… really hates them. (Modern day college AU Nalu)
Author's Notes: Modern day college AU. Actually Nalu with some Gruvia, Gajevy, and Jerza dancing around happily in the background, pretty NSFW due to language and some non-descriptive sexytimes. I also couldn't think of a good title. There is no point to this beyond Gray getting the wrong impression and having a hilariously awkward conversation with Natsu. And Nalu. But Nalu is pretty much always the point.
Why the hell was he even here? Gray hated these kinds of parties. Drunk young people everywhere, making terrible life choices and wrecking the home of whoever had been dumb enough to invite them there. But his rosy haired roommate was popular for some bizarre reason, getting invited to all of these stupid events, and Juvia had really wanted to go… So here he was, holding a lukewarm beer in a plastic cup while standing in a corner and giving everyone who came near the hairy eyeball.
So. Much. Fun.
He glanced around, pinpointing the location of his friends in the chaos. During those times that Erza felt like cutting loose, it fell on him to keep an eye on everyone. Juvia always stuck close enough, roving in circles around him like a satellite so he was always aware of where she was. Erza could take care of herself no matter how much alcohol she imbibed and was currently draped over a madly blushing Jellal's lap, twining her fingers in his blue hair. In another corner, Gajeel was doing his best to pretend he wasn't completely enthralled by whatever Levy was animatedly telling him as he glowered at every guy in a fifteen foot radius that even smelled like they might be interested in the blue haired girl. Lucy had wisely decided to stay home, and Natsu…
Where was Natsu anyway?
Deciding it was safe enough to abandon his post for a few minutes to wrangle up the pink haired idiot, Gray slunk through the crowd. He was fairly certain he knew where Natsu wasn't so he headed towards the back down a hallway that led to the more personal parts of the house. The pyro probably just needed to take a leak.
And there was his insufferable voice now. Gray followed it, making a beeline to the bathrooms only to draw up short and have to backtrack a few feet.
"Aw yeah, I'm all fired up, babe!"
Gray stared so hard at the bedroom door one might think he had x-ray vision or was trying to obliterate the barrier with the power of his mind. There was no way… No. Way.
A peal of feminine giggles made his jaw drop and something dreadful lurch in his stomach. "You wanna help me put it on?" Natsu asked, tone sounding so weirdly suggestive. "Damn, yeah! Just like that, babe… Whoa, that feels really -"
Whatever Natsu had been saying was cut off by a girlish squeal that made Gray nearly jump out of his skin. He had to be misunderstanding this. But the pink haired bastard's pleasure filled groan, loud exclamation of "Fuck!" and sudden vigorous squeaking of bedsprings made the brunette think that maybe he was right on the money with his assumptions.
"Harder? Oh yeah, anything you want… You're so tight!"
Nope. No way was he mistaken now.
Natsu was actually having sex with some random girl he'd picked up at a party. The thought was so foreign that Gray couldn't really make sense of it, and his other mental processes screeched to an all-stop in order to lend a hand figuring things out. The loud mouthed doofus didn't even look at girls who weren't Lucy. It simply didn't compute that he'd break the poor girl's heart just to get some.
"You close? Hnn… just a bit more… I'm gonna… Nggg!"
Nope! Gray spun and moved as fast as he could without full on running. As angry as he was, he just couldn't stand there and listen to his friend fuck this other girl. He found himself standing next to Juvia's elbow without realizing that had been his destination. She peered up at him curiously, perfect mouth turning down in a frown. "Is something wrong, darling?"
Everything was wrong, but it didn't feel right to go spreading this information around until he'd had a chance to properly and viciously ream Natsu out in private. "I'll tell you later," he deferred, and she accepted it.
There was no way he could just let this slide, not after Lucy had confided in him that she thought she'd finally worked the courage up to ask her oblivious crush out. It was just too cruel, and he wouldn't stand for it. Natsu was going to realize what a terrible mistake he'd made if it was the last thing Gray did.
The next morning found him seething at the kitchen table, leg bouncing in impatient agitation and coffee steaming broodingly. And no Natsu. The dumbass had gone home with the floozy.
At the front of his brain, the thought appeared that it really wasn't fair to say such a thing about the mystery girl. After all, Natsu and Lucy weren't actually dating so he hadn't really cheated on her.
But the back of his brain didn't give a damn about that. Everyone on the freaking campus knew the two were inseparable, and anyone getting in between his friends' happiness was automatically an enemy.
Now, now, cautioned the front lobes, you don't know anything about this girl or what happened, so you should wait until Natsu comes back and get the story from him.
Shut the fuck up, said the hindbrain.
Same to you, said the fore, Douchebag.
Just then the keys jangled and the lock turned, threshold disgorging a disheveled but obnoxiously perky Dragneel. He whistled as he waltzed through the apartment, coming to a sudden stop when he encountered the glowering Fullbuster.
"It's about time," Gray snapped. "You didn't come home last night."
"Uh, sorry?" the tardy pink haired student said. "Was I supposed to call?"
Gray took a menacing drink from his coffee mug, setting it back down with a definitive 'clack.' "Did you enjoy the party last night?"
Narrowing his eyes, Natsu tried to wrap his head around whatever might be causing Gray's weird mood. "Uh… Yeah. I really did. What's this abou-"
"Yeah, it sounded like you had a really good time."
Natsu sighed. He didn't have the time or patience to dissect this shit. "What's your problem, man?"
"You! You're my problem!" Gray rose to his feet, leaning right into his roommate's face. "How could you sleep with her?!"
Face going pale under his tan, Natsu backed up. "Uh… Y-you know about that?"
The brunette snarled. "I heard it. I was right outside the door when you started banging her. How could you do that to Lucy?!"
Hands coming up defensively, Natsu exclaimed, "I swear we were both sober, and we used protection! I asked her six times - I counted - if she was sure, and she said she'd even sign a waiver if I had one, but I didn't so… we kinda just had sex instead. I don't think I could get more consent than that." He paused briefly, checking on his friend's level of ire before tacking on, "And I promise that I made her come first. I would never hurt her. You know that!"
Gray's rage ground to a halt, gears spinning uselessly in the mud of confusion. And then it clicked. "Wait. The girl you slept with at the party was Lucy?!"
"Keep it down, Snowflake! She doesn't want everyone to know yet."
Ignoring the request, Gray argued, "But she said she wasn't going."
"Yeah, well," Natsu shrugged, "I laid on her till she gave in and agreed to come along. It's always boring without her."
The image was perfectly clear in Gray's mind since he'd seen it dozens of times - the moron literally sprawling on Lucy's back, pinning her to the couch, until she frustratedly agreed to whatever ridiculous thing he wanted. A palm connected with his forehead, and the creak of teeth grinding together could be heard. "God damn it, Natsu. I thought you'd gone home with some stranger."
"No way." The spiky head shook a strong negative. "I went back to Lucy's place… and since she jumped me again as soon as we got in the door, I don't think she was mad at me or anything."
Gray waved his hands in a shooing motion, wanting to be done with this embarrassing scene and dropping back into his chair where his coffee was patiently waiting. "I can't believe you had sex with Lucy at a party. In someone else's bed. Classy, man."
Availing himself of the brunette's lovingly crafted pot of coffee, Natsu snorted. "That wasn't my idea. She's the one who decided she didn't want to wait." He took a sip from his mug and leaned against the counter. "It was the craziest thing. She was acting really weird and wouldn't tell me what was wrong even when I bugged the crap out of her. Then she dragged me into that bedroom and told me she was in love with me! Can you believe it?"
Grimacing, Gray decided against revealing just how much he knew about Natsu and Lucy's relationship. "Shocking."
"I mean, what else was I going to say? I've been nuts about her for ages…" Natsu's face took on a mushy turn, smiling goo-ily into his drink. "She's amazing. I'm crazy in love with her."
"You're definitely crazy, yes."
He shot his roommate a glare. "Anyway, she threw me on the bed after that and we kinda -"
Gray held up a hand. "No. I do not want details. I get it, and I'm really glad I didn't have to waste part of my day beating the shit out of you for breaking her heart. There are other things I need to do. Like laundry."
"Like you could take me," Natsu muttered, draining the rest of his beverage and pouring another cup. It was pretty obvious that he hadn't slept much even if he was still in extremely good spirits.
Either way, Gray couldn't stop the vindictively gleeful thought that popped into his head. "Oh, now that you two are finally a couple, there's something Juvia's been bugging me about for a while."
"Yeah?" The poor idiot's look of interest faded into one of dread when he saw the positively evil grin on his friend's face. "W-what?"
Two words were all it took to strike fear into the indomitable Salamander. "Double date."