Disclaimer: I do not own Kyo Kara Maoh. Because if I do though, I'd marry Wolfram myself. I recommend listening to Ariana Grande's My Everything while reading this fic for additional feels. Thank you.
My Everything
The nights hadn't been the same. The once warm and welcoming bed that greets Yuuri at night isn't exactly warm and welcoming anymore.
It had been a couple of months now. A couple of months after that fateful morning.
It had been a beautiful morning so far, until Gwendal called them for a 'meeting' in Yuuri's own office. They told Yuuri that if he didn't marry Wolfram now, the engagement will be dissolved.
"Five years is the maximum traditional span of engagement. If a couple wasn't married yet until the fifth year, the engagement will be nulled. Five years is long enough for a couple to decide whether they really want to be with each other until eternity. If they haven't decided yet, it must mean that, maybe, they just aren't really for each other," they told Yuuri.
All through the talk, all Yuuri could think was, Finally! Our engagement will end! This day was just going great for Yuuri, mindless to the blond whose heart was slowly twisting beside him.
"I've told you guys from the start, marriage isn't on my mind yet," the raven-haired boy stated, giving his consent for the annulment.
All eyes turned to Wolfram. His face was emotionless. But all who were in the room, except for their dense king of course, knew the incomparable hurt the blond was feeling right then. They all expected an outburst, being the selfish and arrogant brat that he was. But they were all taken by surprise by the prince's reply, "Okay."
Gasps were heard. Disbelief evident in their faces.
Wolfram looked at them sternly, "I give my consent for the annulment."
Yuuri thought that that was the best day of his life.
But apparently, he was wrong.
Now, coming home to an empty and cold bed doesn't really justify that. Since that day, he had not just lost a fiancée - but a friend as well.
Wolfram's clothes and other things were moved out of the royal bedchambers that afternoon. Yuuri was surprised that night to come to his bed and not see the blond. He started to worry but then he remembered, they were not fiancée's anymore.
The two spent less and less time together.
Yuuri was in his office while Wolfram was with his troop. He doesn't have any more business with the king's office now. He was back to being just a specialties soldier. That made the king feel more distanced from the blond.
Days passed and Yuuri found out he misses the presence of the blond beside him. He had been there for most of the young king's stay in Shin Makoku. Yuuri's days crave and need Wolfram's presence - even his shouts and accusations to Yuuri - so the sudden disappearance and lack gave him an uneasy and incomplete feeling.
It worsens and worsens every passing day. Not seeing him, not talking to him, not even hearing his voice. Yuuri felt like he's in a timeless and colorless void. Seconds, minutes, hours, days pass by; but all of them were of no significance.
Until one day, he can't take it anymore. He just had to talk to Wolfram.
He went out of his office and searched every corner of Blood Pledge Castle. Yuuri's legs were already tired when he found his ex-fiancée.
"Wolfram!" he called up to the blond who was in a rush running pass the corridor.
His call was heard because the blond slowed down and eventually stopped in his tracks. A warm feeling seeped through Yuri's heart - being finally blessed with the attention he was missing all these agonizing days. A goofy smile spread through his face.
"Hey, I was wondering, would you like to-"
"I'm sorry," Yuuri was effectively cut off, emerald eyes not meeting his black ones, "I'm in a hurry. My soldiers and I are to depart for our border patrol, Your Majesty. So I must leave."
And with that, he ran. Leaving a gaping Maoh at his wake. The king watched the retreating form of the ex-prince. Hurt that he was just left there.
He called me Your Majesty... He called me Your Majesty… Yuuri repeated to himself. He no longer calls me Yuuri… Why, Wolfram? I'm still Yuuri. I'm still Yuuri.
That scene played and played through the king's mind.
It played. Over and over again. Against the white pages of papers he signed, he continued to see the scene. When he turned to the window, he still saw the scene. When he closed his eyes, there's still the scene.
Over and over and over again. Until he became fully dysfunctional the whole day, his advisors thought he might be ill.
"Heika is not well," Gunter observed, eyes glued to the bowed head of the Maoh.
"Your Majesty," Gwendal called, with a hint of softness in his voice. The king reluctantly raised his head.
The two advisors were surprised to see that his face was ashen, eyelids drooping, fatigue evident in them. The Maoh let out a weak, "Yes?"
"Would you like to take the rest of the day off? You don't look well. Maybe a rest will do you good," Gwendal offered.
When Gwendal and Gunter closed the door of the king's bedchambers, it wasn't long until they heard a loud cry of frustration. They thought they might have just imagined it, but they sensed a bit of heartbreak in that, too. It was soon followed by sounds of crashing and shattering inside the room.
The young king screamed his lungs out.
"WHY?!"
"WHAT DID I DO?!"
"WHAT HAVE I DONE?!" followed by more sounds of thrashing and even tearing of cloth.
Minutes passed, and a moment of silence followed. It seemed as though the Maoh had already calmed down.
Gwendal and Gunter continued their walk down the hall but they heard the king again.
A pained whisper that has the deepest of sorrows that'll twist your heart, "I am sorry..." Yuuri sobbed, "I'm sorry it took me so long to realize… that I—I love you too."
You are my everything. With you, I got everything. Without you, I'm nothing.
He sees him everyday. And it breaks his heart everytime. He sees him - his king that owns every part of him but he can't even touch a part of, his dream that is yet too real but seems very far-fetched, his love that will never love him back, his runaway groom even before the wedding happened.
Wolfram saw the light in Yuuri's eyes when they were to annul their engagement. And who was he? Who was he to deprive that beautiful man he gave his whole heart to the happiness he wants? It may sound cliché but, Wolfram loved him enough to let him go. He said yes. He gave his consent. He threw his happiness out the window just to see the light and happiness in those black eyes that he always find himself drowning into. He gave away his right to be happy just to see his beloved happy. Just to see Yuuri smiling wholeheartedly, he'd do anything wholeheartedly.
The blond thought, Even if we're not engaged, I can still see him. I can still admire him from afar. But only from afar. I don't have a right anymore. Who am I to go near him and spend some time with him? I'm no longer a candidate to be his equal. I am now his subordinate. A commander of his army. Nothing more. I can't get too close. Because I know that if I get too close, I'd fall deeper. Deeper into the void of my love for Yuuri, with no one in the bottom to catch me.
Wolfram delved deeper into his thoughts, I know I shouldn't be but, I'm sorry for loving you. I'm sorry for troubling you for five long years with these… these… unnecessary and utter rubbish feelings. I'm sorry I pushed myself to you. I'm sorry I hoped too much. I'm sorry I thought maybe… just maybe… you'll come to terms with your issues and accept my feelings. I'm sorry I thought we could be a family - you, me and Greta. I'm sorry for being selfish. I'm sorry for being bratty. I'm sorry for being arrogant. I'm sorry for being too proud. I'm sorry for being a male. I'm sorry for being me.
The blond wiped the tears he didn't realize earlier that were flowing.
"But you know what, Yuuri?" Wolfram whispered into the cold night air, tilting his head up so he can see the black night sky, his tears slowly dripping to the sides of his eyes and into his hair, "I will always love you. Even in the next lifetime."
"Even if it takes another lifetime for you to realize you love me, I will gladly wait."
"There's no need for another lifetime, Wolf."
Author's Note: HELLOOOOO! This is my first fic so please help me. Rate and review please. Thank youuuuuuuu. And, I must say, Ariana Grande's latest album is so great. Check it out! I edited this fic because someone advised me to for me not to be reported with copyright infringement. Hope ya'll understand. J'Til next time. Mwaaaaa. Happiness and love to the world!
-ash
