Happy Tree Friends in…

Train Carnage

This week featuring: Pop and Cub, Lifty and Shifty, and Petunia

With special guest appearances by Flippy the bear, Lumpy the moose, Robbo the raccoon, and Stinky the skunk

A/N: Yes, I've made yet another HTF fanfic, this one with two separate parts to it. I've also added two new characters, one named Stinky, who is Petunia's skunk boyfriend. …No, I'm not going to tell you why he's named Stinky. The other, Robbo, is Lifty and Shifty's long lost cousin. Anyway, this is about all of the HTF animals taking a nice relaxing train ride into the city during a beautiful sunset. The only problem is that the Curse Idol has also managed to get itself on board…

There was a beautiful sunset slowly descending beyond the horizon at the train station in the HTF village. All of the jolly animals were waiting patiently for the blue and white striped train to arrive and take them to downtown. Four of the main passengers were Pop and Cub, who were sitting on a bench and looking left and right for the train. The other two were Petunia and her new boyfriend Stinky, who was a red skunk with a dark orange stripe on his back and head. He used to be nicknamed Blaze because of his "fiery" attitude; he always sprayed someone with his skunk oil if he noticed that someone was hitting on his girlfriend.

Of course, there were several other HTF characters ready to board the train too, like Nutty and Flaky, Giggles and Cuddles, and many, many others. Lumpy was wearing a standard train station uniform and was working part time at the station, for reasons no one knows. Pop unfortunately fell asleep while resting on the park bench, which lead to Cub to wander off alone, giggling and cooing to himself. Nutty was busy jolting his head left and right and laughing to himself, happy that he'd be able to get a taste of the royal surgrass cookies they served only on the train.

Even Flippy was waiting at the train station. Yes, Flippy was actually going to ride the train and attempt to not flip out. So far he was doing well; he was listening to relaxing music with a CD player and his headphones, making sure he was reminded nothing of the war. Disco Bear was also listening to music, performing funny dance moves while listening to disco and techno music on his headphones. All of a sudden, Lumpy yelled out a command and everyone looked right to see the train soaring down the tracks at lightning speed.

Pop suddenly woke up and muttered, "Huh?" when he realized that his infant son was no where to be found. Then he looked ahead and saw that his son was looking right on the tracks, about to fall on them and get run over. Pop screamed and began to sprint to his son, quickly swiping him back into his arms before he was killed, sighing with relief. The train stopped in front of the HTF animals and hissed loudly, before the doors slowly slid open and several other HTF animals walked outside on the station platform. Just as Pop and Cub were about to enter with their luggage, Pop bumped into an orange squirrel and dropped Cub and his luggage, causing Cub to cry. Pop tried to comfort Cub while the squirrel began to put the things he dropped into his suitcase. However, Cub immediately began to stop bawling as easily as he started when he saw an odd gold doll resting on the cement.

It looked something like a tiki from some ancient civilization, but it actually turned out to be the Curse Idol, the one thing that was created to cause a series of "unfortunate events" or as normal people would say, gruesome deaths that happened inexplicably. Cub began to laugh and tossed the idol into the air like a ball, playing with it. Pop noticed what the item was that he picked up, but when he tried to give it back to the squirrel, Cub began to whine again. So Pop simply shrugged and let Cub keep the idol.

All of the animals were beginning to board the train, when all of a sudden, three mischievous raccoons appeared from around the station corner and laughed menacingly, with devilish smiles across their faces. It was Lifty and Shifty of course, but a third, blue raccoon was also accompanying them. His name was Robbo, and he was just as greedy and mischievous as his two older cousins. The three of them were planning on robbing the train for every penny and hopefully, leaving the train with all of the loot…and their limbs…intact. Lifty went over the plan with his twin brother and cousin, quietly grunting several signals and showing examples of the plan with his hands. The other two raccoons nodded and began to sneak up behind the train.

The last passengers, Stinky and Petunia and Disco Bear, boarded the train. Pop and Cub had already boarded and took their seats, with the two of them saying goodbye to other HTF animals. But the weird thing was, when Pop and Cub were looking out the window and waving goodbye, the Curse Idol was looking directly at the squirrel that they bumped into. A giant clock was attached to the station building right above him…with a loose bolt. The bolt somehow unscrewed itself and landed on the squirrel's head.

"Huh?" he questioned, picking up the bolt and scratching his head.

The squirrel looked up and screamed when the clock pitched itself forward and landed right on top of him, crushing his body and killing him instantly, splattering blood everywhere. Funny thing is…no one even seemed to notice. Lumpy yelled "ALL ABOARD!" in a muffled way, standing near the train doors and making sure that no one was left behind. Unfortunately, his arm was still caught in the doorway and for some reason, the doors instantly slammed shut. Normally, the doors would slowly close and lock, but it malfunctioned and slammed shut right on Lumpy's arm. Lumpy shouted and tried to pull out his arm, grunting with effort and using as much strength as possible. But nothing seemed to work, and now he was running with the train as it began to accelerate down the tracks.

Meanwhile, Lifty, Shifty, and Robbo were running on the tracks behind the train, panting heavily as they began to sprint to the train. Lifty grunted loudly and threw himself on the ladder of the train. Shifty was sweating a lot, but he too managed to get on board, making a loud grunt and jumping on the ladder. Robbo was falling behind due to his weight (he wasn't fat, but he did have a noticeable belly that was bigger than his cousins' bellies) and he was a good two feet behind his cousins. Robbo was panting loudly as he tried to catch up to the rapidly accelerating train, but it looked like he was about to be left behind. Lifty and Shifty shouted out encouragements to their cousin, but he wasn't getting any faster, even though the train was. Lifty grumbled and took a rope out of his pocket, throwing it to Robbo for him to catch. Robbo caught the thick nylon rope and his cousin grunted over and over as he dragged his cousin to the ladder. Robbo sighed with relief when he latched his hands onto the metal rims of the ladder, slowly climbing onto the top of the train with his cousins.

Lumpy's arm was still stuck in the train door and he was being dragged across the ground, screaming as his skin peeled off like a banana. The train was moving so fast that pretty soon, his feet were torn in half by the train's increasing speed. Lumpy was headed right for the wall of the train station, ready to be flattened like a pancake. Lumpy screamed wildly before his whole body splattered into the concrete wall, crushing all of his bones and ripping off his arm. But at least the train was still moving and no one else (besides that squirrel) died.

The sun was barely even peeking over the horizon and it was about to be dark in the next half hour. Everyone was relaxing, eating dinner, or taking a nap. Like Pop for example. He was snoring in the cabin chair with Cub in his lap…or that's what he thought. Cub was still awake and giggling playfully, tossing the idol up and down like a toy. He slowly climbed off of his father's lap and began to crawl down the corridor.

Meanwhile, Stinky and Petunia were talking to each other, with a flirt or two here and there made by Stinky. Disco Bear was still jamming to the disco beat on his headphones while sitting in his chair. Disco Bear decided to take off his earphones and was eavesdropping on the conversation between Petunia and Stinky. Disco Bear, in his sort of nature, butted in and began to hit on Petunia, regardless of the fact that Stinky was sitting right there. Stinky growled gutturally and started yelling at Disco Bear angrily. Disco Bear simply ignored him and continued to say flirty comments in Petunia's ear. This was something he shouldn't have done, because Stinky turned around and wagged his tail in Disco Bear's face, farting out a giant trail of skunk oil.

Disco Bear screamed and held his burning eyes and nose, appalled from the smell. He ran into the bathroom and began to wash off his whole body with water and soap. How was he gonna be attractive to the ladies if he reeked of rotten eggs and vinegar? Stinky returned to his girlfriend and they began to talk again…just in time for the food to arrive. Stinky and Petunia shouted with joy and began to eat their meal. However, Stinky noticed a weird idol on the cart that the food was delivered on, leading him to question what it was. But after he did, his stomach growled and his face began to turn green. Somehow, the idol managed to poison the food Stinky was eating and it made him nauseous. Stinky's cheeks puffed up and his retched loudly while holding his mouth shut with his hands. Stinky quickly rushed to the bathroom and locked the door, where he began to vomit in the toilet.

In another train car, Giggles and Nutty were eating a plate of cookies. Nutty, with his sugar craving behavior, jammed his whole face onto the plate and began to chow down on all of the round desserts. He started to giggle wildly when he got another sugar rush, but after a mere five seconds, the rush was gone. Nutty sighed dejectedly. Lucky for him, Giggles hadn't finished her plate of cookies, so Nutty devised of a plan to acquire them without her knowing. Nutty laughed and slowly reached his hand over her seat, moving his sticky fingers down to her plate. Giggles saw the hand and grumbled, slapping it away. Nutty shouted, "OW!" and moaned dejectedly again. Nutty moved his hand around her seat and tried to get the cookies that way, but Giggles simply slapped it away again. Now Nutty was getting angry and agitated. He only wanted one…seven cookies. Was that really too much to ask?!

Nutty laughed loudly and jumped over her seat and snatched the plate of cookies away from her. He ran into the corridor and looked back at her.

"MINE!!!" he shouted hastily.

Nutty began to run to another car through the train doors while Giggles sat in her chair, shouting loud protests against the sugar frosted squirrel. Nutty began to shove the whole plate of cookies into her mouth while giggling psychotically now. It's too bad that Nutty didn't see the dropped idol on the floor, because he tripped over and fell on his face, accidentally jamming the plate into his throat. He stood up and started gasping in an airy way, trying to massage his neck so the plate would hopefully come out. Petunia screamed and some of the other passengers tried to help him, but no one knew the Heimlich maneuver. It was at this time when Pop woke up and realized that his son had left him…again. Nutty's body was turning blue and he was slowly losing consciousness, seconds away from dying. All of a sudden, Toothy came into the car and saw Nutty choking. He knew the Heimlich maneuver and put his fist into his stomach, repeatedly thrusting him until the object dislodged itself.

Suddenly, the cart carrying food came out of nowhere and slammed into the two squirrels. Nutty slammed on the hard surface of it and the plate shot itself out of Nutty's neck from the back end. Now…Nutty wasn't decapitated, but he was basically a Pez dispenser now. Toothy still wasn't dead though; he was stuck on the cart screaming for his life. He was moving too fast to jump off and he was afraid that if he went under it, it'd run him over. At the last second, the cart hit the idol and turned sideways, hurling Toothy through the corridor and sliding in-between the bathrooms perfectly, sealing Stinky and Disco Bear inside.

Disco Bear had finished washing himself off and turned off the water faucet. He then sniffed himself again to see if the stink went away. Disco Bear groaned and grumbled when he noticed that he still reeked of skunk oil. He had washed himself over nine times now and the smell still didn't go away. If only he brought a can of tomato sauce... Disco Bear grumbled angrily and turned on the faucet again, splashing his face. But when he tried to turn it off, it wouldn't shut off. Disco Bear gasped dramatically when the water began to spill over the sink and onto the floor. It was quickly rising up to Disco Bear's knees. Should he continue to stay in the bathroom, he would drown. Disco Bear rushed to the door and started to pound on it, only to find out that it was blocked by the cart. The door opened only a centimeter or less. Disco Bear screamed and began to pound on the door in a panicked way. But it still wouldn't open.

Toothy was screaming loudly as he hung on the back rail of the caboose outside of the train with his hands, trying to hold on as hard as he could. He hadn't lost his grip yet, but the rushing cold wind and vibration of the train rolling across the wooden tracks made it nearly impossible for him to keep his grip any longer. Toothy screamed again when a screwdriver impaled him in the back. Lifty, Shifty, and Robbo were sifting through a bag of robbery and burglary tools, tossing the ones they didn't need behind the train. It was Toothy's unluckiness that he was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Robbo held up a saw and waited until his cousins confirmed if they needed it for robbing the train. The twins shook their heads and Robbo threw it backwards off the train, inadvertently cutting off Toothy's left leg. Then Robbo held up a flamethrower and waited for his twin cousins to say something. Once again, they shook their heads and he threw it behind him, setting Toothy on fire. Robbo took out a hammer and grunted questionably at his cousins, but they still grunted and nodded their heads, telling him to toss it overboard. Normally, the hammer would bonk Toothy in the back of his skull, but the hammer was pointed backwards and the claws (the part of the hammer designed to pry out nails) impaled the burning squirrel in the eyes.

The flaming squirrel fell through the wooden tracks, screaming to his death as he fell down what appeared to be a bridge built for the train. Toothy continued to scream as he fell all the way to the rocky earth, getting impaled with hundreds of pointy sharp rocks. Back on the train, Stinky was done throwing up and he too was busy banging on the door that had been sealed shut by the food cart. Stinky yelled ferociously and kicked the door so hard that it kicked into the other bathroom, knocking down the other door. Stinky was welcomed with several galloons of water from the other bathroom, followed by Disco Bear's deceased body. Disco Bear drowned almost instantly when the water reached his nostrils. Stinky looked left and right, witnessing a near decapitated dead squirrel and several pedestrians screaming and running around like crazy.

Stinky grunted questionably and scratched his head in confusion.

To be continued…