Tobi's life at Akatsuki
Tobi walked into the living room and saw a large sign on the wall.
Rules for Tobi:
1. Don't make fake money, put your face on it and say it is worth $100, because we all know Kakuzu would believe it.
2. Don't announce in front of Kisame's door that you are going fishing and describe how you are going to kill the fish.
3. Don't paint all of Sasori's puppets hot pink.
4. Don't go up to Itachi amd say, "I love you brother." He will cry.
5. Don't write love letters to Konan saying they are from Pain, because we all know she will go in his room half naked and expect something.
6. Don't glue Deidara's hands together so they can make-out, we all know he would enjoy that to much.
7. Don't ware other religious jewelry and walk into Hidan's room announcing you will help him with his rituals
8. Don't randomly throw magnets at Pain, then yell, "Hey they stick!"
9. Don't run around pretending you are blind in front of Itachi.
10. Don't eat all of the food at each base, then tell Kakuzu to buy more, because we will all starve.
11. Don't buy plants, then tear all of their leaves off saying, "He loves me, he loves me not," in front of Zetsu.
12. Don't run around the Akatsuki base yelling "Lord Jashin is outside," because Hidan will flip out.
13. Don't yell in Pain face, "HA HA you're not real!"
14. Don't try to kill Hidan, then say, "Damn you really are immortal."
15. Don't ware a Tu Tu and run around in front of Deidara, we all know that would turn him on.
16. Don't water Zetsu, raise yo hands in the air and tell him "to spread his roots."
17. Don't run around the Akatsuki base singing "Im blue da bu dee da bu da." Especially in front of Kisame.
18. Likewise, don't run around singing, 'This is the song that never ends.'
19. Don't draw penis' on Konan's origami paper and say it is art, this will only encourage her.
20. Don't change all the nail polish out for the Del Sol nail polish that turns to hot pink in the sun.
21. Don't walk into Hidan's room, chop off his leg and put it in Zetsu's room, Hidan will never walk in two feet again.
22. Don't go into Zetsu's green house and kill all of his plants, then blame it on Hidan.
23. Don't tell Kakuzu how much every thing in people room's are worth, they will vanish.
24. Don't constantly ask Deidara if he has a dick, though we all would like to know, it is rude.
25. Don't replace Zetsu's lights in his room for grow lights, then say, "This should help."
26. Don't go up to Konan and point to her chest saying, "Are those real?"
27. Don't slowly lick your food, it only encourages everyone.
28. Don't go into people's rooms, point to the bed and say, "What is that white stuff?" It will make Pain nervous.
29. Don't run around saying you are a Jedi because you are not.
30. Don't ask Itachi how his love life is.
31. Don't buy Barbies for Sasori and say they are for his collection.
32. Don't send a fish to the taxidermist, then give it to Kisame as a present.
33. Dont' steal all of the hair product then put them all in Deidara's bathroom.
34. Don't use all of the hot water.
35. Dont' go up to Kisame and tell the story "The little fish that could."
36. Dont' ask Kakuzu if he will make you a sweater.
37. Don't randomly give tours to outsiders of the base.
38. Don't suck your thumb in front of Zetsu, then say it taste good. He will charge across the table and try to eat it.
39. Don't run around yelling, "The German's are coming, the German's are coming!" You will put everyone in a frenzy.
40. Don't criticize Deidara, or Sasori's artistic abilities.
41. Don't stand on one side of Konan while Pain is on the other, pinch her butt, then point at Pain.
42. Don't go up to Sasori and tell him he looks like a cute doll.
43. Don't mess with the thermostat.
44. Don't write on all the walls saying, "FAIL!"
45. If anyone complains about anything; don't tell them to call the wambulence.
46. Don't tell Hidan swearing is bad, he will only swear more.
47. Don't spread rumors around Akatsuki that Pain and Konan are sleeping together. It may be true, but no one need to know that. Well...
48. Don't buy the colored gold fish, pick out all the blue ones, then give them to Kisame.
49. Don't fill Kisame's room with water, then ask him if he feels at home.
50. And Tobi... Don't throw away all of the swimsuit magazines, some of us like to read them... ok all of us do.
Tobi looked around.
"But... Tobi is a good boy!"