Title: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Author: mavjade
Disclaimer: I don't own Brothers & Sisters, nor Kevin and Scotty. I wish I did, but alas I do not.
Characters: Kevin
Timeline: Set during 3.10- Just a Sliver
Summary: Kevin reflects on who he was, who he is, and who he will be.
Authors Note: A short little ficlet that just came to me out of nowhere. I'm not usually the biggest fan of 1st person, but I guess Kevin just wanted to talk through me! :p
Please feel free to leave concrit! (Still worried about OOC-ness!)
~*~*~*~
Yesterday I was just Kevin Walker; son, brother, husband, lawyer, a democrat working for a republican, there were many ways to describe me. Today, all that has changed. I am still all of those things, but I am something much more.
While sitting in a waiting room with my baby brother and my husband who was cutely harping on the quality of hospital food, my eldest brother change my world with one small sentence.
"Kevin, it's you."
My heart immediately began to race, I looked at Scotty and saw something I hope to never see on his face again. Pure, unadulterated terror. I'll admit I was afraid too, knowing that now I would soon be going under the knife, giving part of my liver to my-- brother's daughter. It wasn't a decision, really, even though Tommy and I had been having problems, I wasn't [i]not[/i] going to do this.
I owed it to him and I owed it to little Elizabeth.
Today I am Kevin Walker; son, brother, husband, father -if only in the biological sense, but it doesn't make it any less of a fact. I had reservations when Tommy asked me to donate sperm, but with anonymity I decided it would be alright. Tommy would get the child he had always wanted, and we would never know who had given the biological seed. Justin and I would just be two loving uncles and nothing more. Now, Justin is the loving uncle and I am--
--I don't know.
Tommy will always be her father, but now I feel more than an uncle. It's strange how one little thing can change your perspective on the entire world. And Scotty, how will Scotty feel about this? He was there when the issue of sperm was originally brought up and he thought I should do it. Did he ever think that such a decision would ever directly impact him? We've never really talked about children, only in passing as a subject to be discussed in the future, but today that future is here.
As I follow Tommy to the lab, I think of all these things at once, and it is starting to overwhelm me. I try to relax like Scotty is always telling me to do, but I don't know that it is working, the farther we walk the more anxiety creeps up at me. I stop in the hallway, leaning my head against the wall and close my eyes. I can feel Tommy looking at me, waiting for me to continue following him. I take a deep breath and push all my worries down and focus on right here, right now, and right now, I have to go give some more blood. The rest will come as it may.
Tomorrow, I will be Kevin Walker; son, brother, husband, but other than that I don't really know who I'll be; other than short a pice of liver.
~end