"Who the hell is this?"

"Well, exactly I suppose. Not the exact locale however. Not yet, any road."

"Lucifer?!"

"Yes, Maze. Gone daft in my absence have you? Hasn't been that long, has it?"

"Shut up and talk. What's this number you're calling from? And where are you?!"

"Those trifling details are of no great importance."

"Uh, there are more than a few people here, AND ME TOO, who would beg to differ with that ridiculous statement."

"Yes well, can't be helped I'm afraid."

"Liar."

"You know I'm not."

"No. I know….but I know something else, too."

"Do you now? And what's that?"

"You might be a truth-teller, but only your version. Only what you're aware of."

"Is there a point to this diatribe? Patience has never been my greatest virtue and it's a bit at a low ebb now, my dear demon."

"YES. How can stay away after…you know. With you and her. Hell, how could you leave in the first place?"

"You know why. Or have you truly gone daft? I was joking earlier…perhaps I shouldn't have if your mental state is that precarious…"

"Stop. Chloe doesn't know, Lucifer. About how she came into being."

"I'm aware of that, Maze. Amenadiel told me. Under some brotherly duress but that's inconsequential as well. I believed him."

"So…why…?"

"You ARE bloody daft! The Detective is here on this plane of existence because she's, and by extrapolation ME, acting a part of my father's design! Another cog in his ludicrous Rube Goldberg-esque machine of existence! It's not enough I'm to be shunted about overtly in roles I've never wished to play; now I'm to have my virginal heart teased and tricked as well? Made to do his bidding – whatever or HOWever that entails – because he's finally pulled a page from Mum's book and decided to play sly? Well, no THANK you to THAT!"

"Lucifer…."

"WHAT?!"

"Stop. Seriously, think. Please. You'd spite yourself – and Chloe – horribly just on the off chance it would piss your dad off more? Don't you have more to lose than him?"

"What rubbish are you prattling on about now?"

"I mean, yes, Chloe's life was in his hands…but aren't all of them in some way? Each human?"

"For the sake of the argument you seem bent upon us having, perhaps - what of it then? So?"

"So, what's the difference HOW she came into being? It's not like anyone could know what would happen when and if you two met, right? And look what you have a chance at…a chance you're screwing up more and more the longer you stay away. Right?"

….

"Right?"

…

"Lucifer?!"

"Yes, yes, I'm still here."

"Well?!"

"I have to go."

"Lucifer!"

"This was a mistake. Goodbye, Maze."

"No – wait! Why did you call? Tell me that anyway."

….

"Was it because you wanted to know how Chloe was? If she was okay?"

….

"She isn't, for what it's worth."

….

"What do you have to say to that?"

….

"WELL?"

"She will be in my absence, Mazikeen. She'll have a much greater chance at happiness without me."

"Lucifer, no…you don't know that…"

"Good thing you're there to mop up the messy bits. I do thank you for that small kindness. You have indeed become a friend to these creatures you used to despise."

"I was your friend first."

"Certainly not. We were many things; 'friendship' certainly not among them."

"You're wrong but whatever. And we are now. You know that too, stubborn ass that you are. And I am telling you as your friend that the mistake you have made is just compounding the longer you take to fix it. Come back."

"No. That is where you're wrong, 'my friend'. A clean slate untainted by superfluous noise such as friendship or hope, or lo-…or anything…I think is best for everyone."

"Lucifer!"

"Goodbye Mazikeen. Thanks for all you've done. For what it's worth, I appreciated it. You. Mostly."

"Lucifer, wait!"

….

"Lucifer?"

….

"LUCIFER?!"

….

"…oh, lucifer…"

"Yes?"

"Hello, brother."

"Luci! Where are you?"

"No matter; I just called to say…"

"What do you mean 'no matter'? How can you say that?!"

"Simple. I open my mouth and intended words fall out. I do have the gift of a silver tongue…among others. Other talents I plan to utilize sooner rather than later…"

"What on earth are you talking about?"

"No, no, no…that's where you're in error, brother. Not 'on earth' at all. Not for this act in the play I never wanted to be part of. Oh no, not at all."

"Luci…"

"Just wanted you and Mum to keep clear. If you know what's good for you."

"'Keep clear' of what? What are you planning?!"

"I assure you, that will be quite obvious. No need for worry on that account."

"But…you mean…"

"Rest assured brother, change is coming. Second coming even, one might say."

"LUCIFER!"

….

"Lucifer?!"

….

"…Luci…little brother…oh no…."

"Hello?"

"Doctor."

"LUCIFER! Oh thank, G-"

"Careful now."

"Sorry; habit. Are you okay? Wait, no: that was stupid. Obviously not. Where are you?"

"It doesn't matter. Not in the slightest. I merely -"

"Lucifer. Please. Stop. Think. Come back."

"I'm afraid I can't, my dear."

"Can't or won't?"

"What's the difference? The end result's the same. As mine has ever been. You should be proud of me in fact, Doctor. I've finally stopped running from the inevitable."

"I think it's a safe bet to say 'you're still running away', but please – do go on."

"Ah, the tactical logician hard at work. Another constant."

"Yes well, it comes with the territory. I won't apologize for that."

"And why should you? 'Know thyself'. Play to your strengths, darling. I certainly will be."

"What do you mean?"

"Now you can color me surprised, Linda. Really, I'd have thought all those recent yanks up the learning curve would have generated a little interest…a little research not just on who I am….but what I'm for."

"And what is that, Lucifer? Your own opinion, not some dusty tome or mob mentality nonsense."

"Well my dear, it's simple really. Destruction. Of my Father's creation….and then the inevitable denouement."

"And what's that?"

"Of myself, naturally."

"Lucifer, you can't mean…"

"Oh, but I can! It is literally what I'm made for. My birthright bestowed upon me as a hateful legacy. I've spent far too long fighting it and I tire of the struggle."

"No. Stop. You're not…"

"I am. That's a powerful phrase, you know. Galvanizations of all kinds stem from those simple words."

"No! I know you! You're kind, and generous and…"

"Please. I was literally under your body and in front of your face for an extended period of time before you saw but a glimpse of my mere appearance! What more do you think you might've missed? Reams, I assure you."

"…lucifer, no…"

"Linda, yes. But you did try. Harder than many – most even. Including my family not that there's much lost there. I want you to know you have nothing to feel badly for. The effort….your effort on my behalf…it was humbling to experience as I haven't often. Thank you for that."

"Lucifer please. Come back. Come back to your home here. Come back to the people – or whatevers - that want to help you. Who love you."

"Doctor…"

"Lucifer, PLEASE. Please listen to me. We can work through this; just come back."

"No, my dear. Unfortunately that path's washed out. Time to forge a new one. Well…not that new I suppose."

"…no…"

"Thank you, Doctor. Linda. Yes, names are so very important, aren't they? All of them, really. Thank you my dear Linda, for every kindness shown. And fret not: despite what you may think you shan't see me again. You've no place where I've held sway."

"Lucifer!"

….

"Lucifer…?"

….

'…*sob*…'

"Yeah? Dan here. Go."

"Daniel, pay attention…"

"Lucifer? What the hell?! Where are…."

"Ugh, this is getting tiresome. Daniel. Pay attention, I said."

"What?! Where…"

"Dearie me, I have neither time nor inclination for 'Twenty-Questions Geography Version'! So mouth shut ears open, yeah?"

"Fine. Okay. What?"

"Go to your bank first thing on Monday morning. You will find that there is a new account annexed to that paltry husk you call a savings…."

"…wait, how did you…sucha dick…"

"Sorry, something to say? No, I thought not. Any road, it's for the sp-. It's for Trixie. College, car, copious amounts of therapy as she's your child; what have you…little nest egg for whatever she needs. Hatch it carefully; too much freedom leads to ruin. I should know."

"What?"

"Honestly, you all have gone both deaf and daft! This is a simple matter; purely fiscal. Should rather be bringing charges against the imp what with all the unwarranted mauling I've endured from that tiny tentacled creature. It's clearly a case of substandard parenting when the children are allowed to run amok; I know that as well. Now heed: you and…well…her parents are in dangerous employ. I'm simply making certain your offspring ought not suffer hardship should harm ever befall those charged with her care. No progeny should suffer because of their elders' lack of foresight. Ever. That is all."

"Lucifer, I…"

"I said, 'that is all', Detective!"

"Lucifer?"

….

"Lucifer?! C'mon, man."

….

"…oh, shit."

"Decker."

….

"Hello?"

….

"Anyone there? Hello?

….

"Lucifer?! Is this you?"

….

"Don't hang up! Where are you?!"

….

"Lucifer, please."

….

"Just tell me…just tell me why."

….

"Why did you leave? I thought…I mean, I thought that we…"

….

"But I guess I was wrong."

….

"No. You know what? I'm not. I'm not wrong."

….

"You are, for doing this. For leaving me. Us. Even before there's an 'us' to be! How is that even possible? After everything that's happened? Linda and Maze told me…told me what you wouldn't say. No, that's not fair – you did. What I couldn't hear, I guess. Lucifer, I'm so sorry. In my defense it is BEYOND crazy…still acclimating…c'mon now; you have to give me a break on this – you knew how I thought of this stuff. *sigh* But for that loss, for you hiding yourself…for you feeling as if you had to carry that burden alone…you didn't have to, you know. You don't."

….

"Whatever else you are, you're my partner."

….

"And I'm yours. Take it how you want. You know that. But I'm not a doormat either, and you should know that too."

….

"Just - come back, please. Come home."

….

"I won't be angry. Well. I'll try not to be. You do make that difficult sometimes."

….

"I was kidding!"

….

"Sort of…but really. Come home. I need my eggs."

….

"I need you."

….

"And you know what? You need me, too."

….

"Lucifer…please…."

….

….

….

It was easier to throw the cheap phone into the hungry maw of the sea as simply listening to Chloe's voice, and then her reciprocal silence, was far harder than he'd thought. He couldn't even say…well. It didn't matter. Not anymore.

Nothing did.

Nothing mattered except for what was coming next.

Hands in his pockets, brow furrowed against the wind and dark eyes narrowing at the storm brewing upon the evening horizon, Lucifer sucked in a slow breath between clenched teeth.

"The waiting game's drawing to a close now, Dad. Homecoming at long last for your most infamous prodigal."

Far out to sea a single shaft of lightning flickered. As the low growl of thunder rolled over the whitecaps seconds later, Lucifer met it with a simple grin and the reciprocating flash of crimson in his eyes reflected the dull orange skies ahead of the squall.

"Here I come then, ready or not."

The grin became a rictus as he balanced himself on the tideline.

"Olly-olly-oxen-free…."