BLOOD

This trail of blood, red shadow on my pale skin

This is m hair the color of blood, as wisps of paths veins so sick

This is my eyes, puddles of crimson fire, tears ruby transparent

This is the blood, my blood that man have been seeking

The blood of a scared little animal,

And the blood of a terrified child.

This is the blood of my kind that they have spilled.

My heart is empty of joy,

I am filled with hatred,

Hatred for those who have killed

Was my death what I looked for?

In all these waves of blood that rained behind me.

Maybe it was revenge,

looking for a place to call my own,

or maybe it was happiness,

Of a peaceful place, that I will never know.

Or of you, maybe...You...Surely...Your soft eyes, your teasing gestures,

You are so different...So different

Me...I am a child,

betrayed, injured and abandoned.

I tried washing away my pain in the blood of humans.

I was the monster that not even my parents wanted,

Wherever I looked for happiness, I received only pain.

I hoped the kindness I receive from you never ends,

I longed to be laughing along with you,

and to receive your sincere smiles and your embraces,

but I found only blood and gore instead,

You betrayed me.

I am a devil with a broken heart,

and I killed your family,

I will always love you until the end,

because it will always be you that I love, only you that I love.

You suffered greatly because of me...but in the end it was me who suffered,

the broken child that never will be saved.

The clouds are far from me,

My nude body sticks to the earth, and you...you,

and you are far from my reach.

Farther than my vectors...these wretched things that have shed so many innocent lives,

but yet you are closer to me than I would ever thought possible.

You touch me and squeeze me in your arms,

as a child and as a woman.

Your hands, hesitating and liking.

I cry...the tears flow like rivers.

Again the image of that dreadful day won't go away

I'm not a murderer...That were not I.

Maybe one day, that image will fade away,

that the blood from my veins will be empty,

that my eyes will be dry of tears,

that I would have atoned for my sins.

What would I be...happy?

As we could have been, who knows?

If the world did not think of me as a devil.

Monstrous

I think, I cry, I kill.

I look for...

You, me, life, the me that will say to you that I love you,

and the voice that will say to me wherever I go,

that I will protect you.

Or maybe, just a small music box held tightly in the hands of a child full of kindness in his heart,

Suggesting a beautiful and sad melody as soft as the rain

As the blood.

Kyrice, divine elesion

O quam sancta, quam serena,

Quam benigma, quam amoena,

O castitas lilium.