The Grand Finale to my IchiHarem series is finally here! This last one focuses on Ichigo and Rangiku, so you know there's going to be a sex joke involved. Who knows, I might just put these fanfics into a one-shot collaboration with a bonus chapter at the end.
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. Tite Kubo does.
Rangiku Finds Out
Rangiku Matsumoto may come off as a clumsy, sake-drinking, party-loving, paperwork-despising slacker, but everyone knows that she can at least run a newspaper at full efficiency. Once she catches a good word from around the Sereitei, one can bet their Zanpakuto that it will be in tomorrow's paper. How she missed the biggest story of the season was beyond her. She had no idea that the Substitute Soul Reaper Ichigo Kurosaki was dating Captain Soifon of Squad 2, Yoruichi Shihoin, and Squad 13 Lieutenant and his long-time friend Rukia Kuchiki at the same time with none of the girls having a care in the world. The kid was the object of every girl's dream (including her) and the envy of every man in both the Living World and the Sereitei. Rangiku believed that if she could blackmail Ichigo into letting her into his group of girlfriends, then she wouldn't print the whole thing on paper. Little did she know that the blackmail would be pointless.
Meanwhile, Ichigo had just graduated High School. The Colleges, however, would not take him despite his good grades. This is because the Colleges and Universities have heard of him being a Soul Reaper on account of one globally known reporter spotting him and decided that being a Soul Reaper was a good career for him. The only one that accepted him was Karakura Community College, the condition being that he takes online classes only. The bad news: he had to share a class with Uryu, who, due to the events of the 1000-Year Blood War, got reduced to being completely shunned by his friends, even Orihime Inoue. Ichigo and Rukia were the only ones who would talk to him, even if it was just a small greeting. The good news: at least he could work without him knowing where the "Black Crescent" is.
"Oh man, it's good to be home," said Ichigo. After graduating from High School, he decided to use his savings from his Basketball, Soccer, and delivery jobs to move out of his house and into his hideout, using it as his living quarters while making sure his guests and girlfriends are comfortable, not that he would want his dad or Kenpachi Zaraki around as guests.
"Boy, you said it, Ichigo," Ichigo turned around to see Rangiku sitting in one of the chairs he and Soifon bought.
"Hey, Rangiku. I haven't seen you since Soifon and I worked on my dad's truck," said Ichigo with a smirk.
"That was what, a month ago? I heard you started a relationship with Captain Soifon at that time, and eventually Yoruichi and Rukia as well. You seem to be quite a ladies' man apparently."
"Now what makes you say that?"
Just then, Yoruichi comes in follow by Rukia and Soifon. Once they saw Rangiku, they had one thought on their minds: 'Oh crap! We're screwed unless Ichigo thinks of something!'
"Want me to get you a Pepsi? They're on the house and ice cold."
"Thanks, but I think I'll pass."
"Your loss, Ran."
'Did he just call me 'Ran'?' Rangiku thought. Ichigo and Yoruichi each got a Pepsi while Soifon and Rukia made themselves some tea.
"So, Rangiku," said Yoruichi. "What brings you here, hmm?"
"Oh, nothing much. Just passing by and figured I'd drop in and give Ichigo his daily peep show." Once again, Ichigo's face went red at that comment, which also earned glares from Soifon and Rukia.
"I believe that that is our job, right, Lady Yoruichi?" said Soifon.
"Took the words right out of my mouth, Soifon."
"Okay, you got me. I was going to tell you that I found out about this little harem you have going on, Ichigo," said Rangiku.
"And your point is?"
"If you don't let me in on it, I'm going to put it on the front page of tomorrow's paper along with this hideout of yours."
Ichigo and Soifon exchanged smirks before he gave his answer. "No problem."
"R-really? Just like that?" Ichigo just nodded. Rukia yanked him down by the back of his shirt.
"Ichigo, you can't be serious. She will use you as an excuse to blow off work," she whispered. Unfortunately, Rangiku heard what she said.
"Rukia, sweetie, you're forgetting one thing: I blow off paperwork all the time."
"Two reasons I accepted you, Rangiku: 1) All of the damned Sereitei knows already, thanks to Renji telling Shuuhei; and 2) we would've accepted you anyways," stated Ichigo.
"Huh?"
"Yeah. Ichigo and my Little Bee decided to have all of me, you, and Rukia in their relationship, although, Rukia is the most cautious about it," Yoruichi stated. "Of course, you can't really blame her. After all, even though the two fight a lot, she has had a crush on him for a while. She just didn't act on it until he mentioned it to her."
"What about anyone else? I mean Orihime has had a crush on you as well, Ichigo. Plus, she won't go on a date with Uryu after what happened. "
"The other Soul Reaper women are nice and all, even Nemu and the Kotetsu sisters, but they are off limits. Plus, Isane's still grieving over Captain Unohana's death (A/N: Courtesy of Kenpachi), so it wouldn't be right," he explained. This caused Rangiku to admire him more, mainly because he cares so much about someone's emotional health, even though he looks like a tough guy. "But don't worry, Ran. I'm sure we can find some room for Orihime and Tatsuki."
"I hate to ask this, Ichigo, but what about that Fullbringer girl Riruka? Isn't she technically human?" asked Rukia.
"I haven't heard from her since Byakuya killed Tsukishima and I killed Ginjo. I'll have to look for her I guess."
"I guarantee you that she misses you, Carrot-Top," said Rukia in a teasing manner, which, of course, irked Ichigo.
"Well you two ought to keep each other company, because you like that damned crappy Chappy the Rabbit! And would you please quit calling me 'Carrot-Top'?! We're not in Las Vegas, you know!"
"Just kidding, Ichigo. But… *WHAM!* you know not to insult Chappy the Rabbit!"
"I'm sorry, Rukia. I just couldn't resist."
"You see what I mean, Ran. Even if this is a harem, those two act like the stereotypical married couple," stated Yoruichi.
"Yep. So this isn't going in the paper tomorrow, then?"
"Nope."
"I'll ask Orihime and Tatsuki what they think about this. And I'll try to get in contact with Riruka as well," said Ichigo.
"Sounds like a plan, Ichigo. And Rangiku, welcome to the harem," said Soifon.
The End
Took me long enough! Just so you know, I got the idea to add the human girls like Orihime from a guest who posted a review on my "Truck Trouble" fanfic, so consider it a preview of a spin-off series.
Thanks, and as usual, I hope you enjoyed it.