Death in the Family
How could she do this to me? No doubt about it, I hated my mother, but no matter what the past had to say, the moment Mystique went over that cliff, and led to her demise at the bottom of that rocky shore, my heart had torn apart. Why would Rogue do that!? I know that she hated Mystique, but she had absolutely no right to kill her!
I keep going over that same scene over and over again in my mind. The slow-motion of her flying through the air. I teleported down to the shore to try and catch it. But my panic had clouded my judgement. I missed.
Is it my fault you died mother? I feel terrible. Now all I have is your remains sitting in a box under my bed. I wasn't going to let Rogue let you sit at the bottom of a cliff.
I never thought you could simply die. It seems kind of ironic, don't you think? The very girl you killed inside has killed you for real. If I were an unforgiving person, I'd say that was a fitting death for you.
But why did you have to die? It's so horrible. I won't get over this. I know it. But I can't let myself slip into depression; you wouldn't want that.
I never could've seen this far
I never could've seen this coming
It seems like my world's falling apart, yeah
Did you know that I haven't left my room for a whole ten days now? I have cried enough ears to make the Nile river look like a drought. I'm not sure why I am so upset and distraught over your death, but I am. Just goes to show that no matter how many horrible things you've done, we are still family. And everyone's always upset when there's a death in the family.
Why is everything so hard?
I don't think that I can deal with the things you said
It just won't go away.
I remember the day when you told me I was your son. I was upset, angry, even disgusted. Rogue had not known yet that she was also your daughter. She came and comforted me, saying you were crazy, and that there was no way to know if I was your son. I sat there for countless hours, brooding over you. Were you my mother? Apparently you were.
Why didn't you try to reach me sooner? Why did you leave me in germany? Did you not want me? Did you hate how I looked?
That's ridiculous, because I don't look all that different from you. So what was the reason? The question repeats over and over again in my mind.
In a perfect world
This could never happen
In a perfect world,
You'd still be here
You're dead and gone. I can't bring you back for one last talk about our relationship. Everyone has always thought my world is perfect. Lots of friends, popular, cute, not afraid to talk, heck, even pretty smart. But they don't know how I feel underneath. A public outcast because of my appearance. A terrorist for a mother. Having to deal with the fact every day now that my friend, maybe even, might I say, my sister, has killed my mother. I'm dying from the inside out.
And it makes no sense
I can just pick up the pieces
I remember it perfectly crystal clear. You smashed. I crumpled over your stone, lifeless remains and cried. She just walked away. Didn't say sorry, didn't say good riddance, didn't say anything. I picked up your remains, every last finger, every last bit, and brought it to my solitary confinement called my room. I've kept you safe ever since.
But to you…
The image of Rogue, my sister, your murderer, appears in my mind. She's smirking, glad you're dead. Proud she's the one who killed you. Happy that you are finally gone. I hate her now. I hate everything about her. Her dark eyeliner. Her purple lips. Her pale skin. Her white bangs. Her mouth turned up in a proud smirk. Everything.
This means nothing
Nothing at all!
Rogue doesn't care that you're gone, but I do. I miss you, believe or not.
I used to think that I was strong
Till the day it all went wrong.
I think I need a miracle to make it through.
I can't think without my thoughts straying to you, mother. You're gone, but I can't accept it lying down. I need to help you…need to bring you back somehow….somehow keep your memory…
I wish that I could bring you back
I wish that I could turn back time
'cause I cant let go,
I just can't find my way
Yeah, without you, I just can't find my way!
I would do anything, anything, just to see you whole and alive again. I have no understanding for why I miss you so much when you and I were enemies, not close at all. If I could go back to that fateful day I wouldn't have made that fatal mistake. I would've focused, my aim wouldn't miss. I would've caught you. Or, even better, I could just save you all together. But it's impossible. And that makes me hate it all the more.
In a perfect world, this could never happen
In a perfect world, you'd still be here
And it makes no sense
I can just pick up the pieces
But to you
I remember Logan. Had this stupid smile on his face. He, too, is happy you're gone. But I'm not surprised. You two never did see eye-to-eye. But he kept saying good riddance and horrible things like that. The idiot. He always was on Rogue's side.
This means nothing
Nothing at all!
I don't know what I should do now
I don't know where I should go
I'm still here waiting for you
I'm lost when you're not around
I need to hold onto to you
I just can't let you go!
My dear mother. Though you are gone, and I appear to be speaking to myself, I know you can hear me. I will always be with you in spirit, and you with me.
The End