The Best Medicine

Disclaimer: I own nothing, but I really should.

Author's Note: Written in response to an OzMIA challenge. Actually, it popped into my head at around 3 AM, and I realised it would work as the challenge thing. ;) Oh, it's also in Oz-Never-Left Land.

Sliiiiight spoilers for Austin Powers in Goldmember. Slight.

* * * * * * *

Oz woke silently. He usually did. But this was a different silence, one he wanted to keep. He let out a thoughtful-but-too-loud 'hmm'.

Willow was awake. Barely. She turned slightly and spoke through half-shut eyes and a husky, sleep deprived voice.

"Oz?"

Oz wondered if he was so quiet even in sleep that she'd know he was awake just by 'hmm'ing. "Yeah?"

"Mmm. So you are awake. I couldn't sleep. Didn't want to bother you, though."

Oz smiled in the dark. Willow had been sound asleep, this he was sure of. "You never bother me." He could feel her smile against his arm.

Sounding more awake, she asked, "So. What were ya 'hmm'ing about? Dream?"

"Yeah. Strange dream. Even by Sunnydale standards."

"Wow. Was it scary?" Concern.

"No. Not scary. Just… strange."

Willow sat up, pulling the sheet around her. Leaning against the headboard, she urged Oz to sit beside her. He did, of course. They were both wide awake by now.

"I have strange dreams sometimes. Mainly they're scary. But, you knew that," she said, referring to their tradition of Oz waking her from nightmares.

"Well, I don't really remember this dream."

"Oh." She sounded disappointed. "But you said it was strange, and all."

"It was. When I woke up, all I remembered is… laughter."

"Laughter?"

Oz nodded, trying to concentrate and bring back the lost strands of dream. "And… evil."

"Evil?" Now Willow sounded frightened. "Evil? Ok, now that sounds scary, not strange."

"But it wasn't. Scary. It wasn't evil, either. It was… Evil."

"Um… Oz? Was I supposed to catch the difference there? Because it sounded the same, but maybe I just missed the change of Normal Voice to whatever Voice, because I do that sometimes."

Smiling, Oz replied, "No. No different Voice. A capital. Capital E."

There was silence, and then Willow sighed. "I'm starting to wish I didn't wake you up." She reached over to the bedside table and rummaged through the mess on top. "Want some gum?" Oz shook his head, and the smell of watermelon wafted through the room as Willow chewed.

"Is my hair still there?" The sudden question surprised them both, and Oz brought his hand to his head, running it through the slightly spiky, currently red-blond hair. In explanation, he said, "Dream. I remember being bald. And laughing. Evilly."

"I thought you said it wasn't evil!"

"It wasn't! It was Evil."

"Capital again? Doesn't a capital usually mean like, dramatic? Shouldn't that mean it was even more evil than usual?"

"No. There was no evil feeling there." Thinking harder, he remembered. "My name… My name was Evil." Sensing Willow's next comment, he added, "My last name. 'Whatever Evil'."

"Oh. Like… Oz Evil?"

"Yeah. But I don't remember 'Oz' there." There was more silence, until Oz suddenly burst into half-evil laughter.

"Oz??"

"Uh… yeah?"

"What was that?"

"I don't really know. Just happened." Oz sounded embarrassed, as much as he could. "And now I have the urge to dance."

Willow stifled a giggle. "Sounds like your dream is crossing over to you. Like," she said giddily, "it went through an interdimentional portal or something!" Her laughter trailed off suddenly. "Oh my god, Oz, can that really happen??"

Silence.

"Oz?" Willow turned on a lamp, causing them both to squint. "Oz? What is it?"

Oz turned his head slowly to her. The look in his eyes startled her. But what he said startled her much more.

"I will get Austin Powers. They will all pay."

A pinky raised to his mouth, and evil laughter accompanied this announcement.

Lots and lots of evil laughter.

Evil laughter that wouldn't end.

Evil laughter that ended this story.

End.