Following the events of 5x14

Chapter 1:

Em POV

She was gone. Everything happened so fast: the arrest, the plane, the A firework show. She had returned home exhausted and fell asleep as soon as she laid on her bed and closed her eyes. She was awake now and in the dim light of the morning it dawn on her. Paige was gone – and she didn't think she could take it. The first rays of the sun were penetrating through the window reaching her skin softly, but she couldn't feel its warmth; she couldn't feel anything, except the dull pain in her chest. Struggling against her own tears and swallowing the lump in her throat.

Her brain was numb; it was so unreal, she felt she was in an alternative world, living someone else's life. How could this happen to her after everything she went through? Alison? Maia? And then Paige… it wasn't like they found her lifeless body all over again, but in some way it felt just as bad. It felt like she had gone for good, like she would have never seen her again.

She pushed herself off her bed, trudging forward to reach the door, trying to keep steady – she felt queasy and weak. She was almost at the door when she felt she was about to throw up, so she just let herself fall on top of the rubbish container – feeling the acid liquids leave her throat and fill it. Her head reeling, she just stared at the wall for a couple minutes, not sure if she should get up and get dressed – what was the point anyway? It wouldn't have felt any better.

Her phone rang and she finally pulled herself up to take the call. It was Hanna, who just asked her to meet up at Spencer's for an emergency. And that's what she did, moving against the pain and getting out before her mom could say anything.

She parked in front of Spencer's , but a blue Toyota pulling over on the other side of the road caught her attention and she just let her memories drag her away slowly.

She was in the front seat of Paige's car, the brunette right next to her, driving, close enough for her to touch. Music was playing from the radio, rice fields were passing out of the window, together with a light blue sky; the sun was shining and it was a marvelous day. She wasn't really paying attention to any of it, though; all that mattered was Paige, her proximity, their skin barely grazing, the warmth she radiated, that soft lovely smile on her lips, that was just enough to make you pull her closer into a kiss, her beautiful brown eyes that lightened every time she said her name… it was all she saw – everything else was just background.

'Em!'. She got pulled back into her sad, sorrowful reality – too quickly and too roughly for her to bare. But she didn't have a choice – she had to at least pretend she was fine, it was the only way to avoid talking about it. 'Hey, are you ok? I called you like ten times already!' Hanna grabbed her wrist and dragged her through the door to the living room, where Spencer and Aria were waiting. 'Yeah, I just got caught in my own thoughts… so, what's going on? What's the emergency?'
Spencer put her cup of coffee on the kitchen counter and started talking: 'Well, the emergency is A made us think Ali was framing me for the murders she supposedly committed, so that we would get her arrested, and now that she did get arrested, A had exactly what it wanted and can use its new free time to torture us instead. Is it enough of an emergency or do you need something more? '.
'Okay'. The word left her mouth sounding careless, meaningless, the look on her face empty and dull.
'Okay!? Did you hear a word of what I just said? Do you even care at all?' Her eyes wide in surprise, she was incredulous to Emily's reaction to the entire situation. With a worried frown on her face Aria swept in to help: 'Em, we get with Paige being away you must feel awful, but we really need all brains on board right now, we have to find a way to fight this, we can't just let A win the game.'
'Aria's right.' Started Hanna 'Whoever it is, A has been harassing us for way too long, it has to stop, we have to take our lives back, guys!'.
It was Spencer's turn now: 'I don't want to keep living like this, I want to start a new life in college, a life free of games, blackmailing, lying, free of concerns and fear because I can't take it anymore. I want a life free of A, and I deserve it! We all do!'
They all looked at each other more determined than ever, until Aria finally said: 'So, are you with us or not?' Emily kept her eyes put on them, she felt so empty and hopeless. It was true; The A game had been hard, ruthless at times – all the murders and 'accidents' in town were the reason why Paige's parents asked her to move to California in the first place. And after three years it really had taken a toll on her. All this was just too much. She couldn't fight it. Not anymore. She simply didn't care. A had taken her whole time, all her energy and strength, her dreams, her future, and now the person she loved the most. She was done. As far as she was concerned the game was over. It ended the minute Paige's lips left hers and the girl turned to leave. She stared blankly at them for a few more seconds. She still felt sick to the pit of her stomach, and an intense pain burned in her chest. She was almost getting used to those feelings, though. She just blinked once and turned to leave. She didn't know why the hell she decided to even come. It was their war, not hers.

Driving in her car once again, she stopped at a bar sign and pulled over. She needed a second to order her thoughts. She looked briefly at her backseat and a crisp formed on her eyebrows at the sight: there was a small package with a note on top. She knew who it was from even before she took it to read it.
The letters print on the paper lined in front of her, the last of them being a capitol A at the end of the note. She stared one second longer and then read out loud, without even blinking at the words that were leaving her mouth: 'I'm sorry for your loss, Em… maybe this could ease your pain'.