Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.
"Cas, you can't just bottle up your feelings like this!" Dean says angrily. We're standing in the library of the bunker, each on the opposite side of one of the two tables in the center of the room.
"I learned from the best," I say heatedly, glaring at him.
His jaw sets. "I'm entitled to! I've faced way too much crap to feel my emotions all the time."
"You think I'm any different?" I ask. Inside, I can feel my anger and frustration growing. "What have you faced that I haven't been through as well? Your mother died? I didn't even have one in the first place! Your father died, too? Mine's been gone for a long, long time, much longer than your has! You've felt pressured by your younger brother? I have thousands of siblings! I've been alive for millennia, Dean. Don't tell me what to do!"
"But why do you have to do it like this?" he asks, exasperated. "You can talk to me!"
"No, I can't," I say, scowling.
"Why not?" he begs. "Why are you always so distant? You're my best friend, man!"
"Because what you don't know what hurt you," I say, my voice rising in volume. "And you need to be kept safe!"
"From what?" Dean asks, sounding offended.
"Things that can hurt you, obviously!" I shout. "You're more fragile than you think, Dean."
"I can protect myself!" he exclaims. "Why are you treating me like a child?"
"Because I love you!" I scream, all my anger and fear and frustration as him spilling out. "Because I care too damn much about you to see your death! I've seen too many of my brothers and sisters die, and I don't need to watch you die, too!"
His face goes slack in surprise. "Did you just…" he trails off, still staring at me with wide green eyes.
I freeze when I realize what just came out of my mouth. "I…"
"You're kidding, right?" He sounds stunned.
"I…" I can almost feel my heart deflate. No, I'm not kidding, my mind commands me to say out loud. But I don't. It'll only freak him out and drive a spike in our friendship. So, instead of responding to him, I turn away from him quickly. "Maybe I should just go."
There's silence for a few more seconds, and then he says, "Wait!" I turn around just in time to see him hit the table with his hip as he tries to move towards me. He winces, but ignores the pain I imagine he's feeling as he lunges towards me and reaches out to grab my hand.
"You're not kidding, are you?" he asks softly. His face is blank, his expression guarded.
I don't shake my head, simply staring at him instead. I don't want to answer, afraid that any one I give might be the wrong one. However, he doesn't seem to comprehend it, so I give the tiniest shake of my head. Immediately, his whole faces changes. I barely get to see it, though, because he's suddenly pulling me closer, close enough to wrap his arms around me and bring his lips to mine.
The kiss doesn't last very long, probably because I'm so shocked that I'm as stiff as a wooden board.
He pulls back and grins at my, his eyes bright. "Who's the shocked one now, huh?"
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