Disclaimer: Jack Shephard is mine. No, I didn't create him, how EWW that would be?? ;)

Warning: sexual contents. All of it. But you know what you're here for.

A/N: This little piece is a spur of a moment thing written last night for Mystic's birthday, amidst work on a somber Kate-centric story. Guess my mind needed an emergency exit. I bring in for public enjoyment since Jate fanfics seems to be what is craved the most, as my uber-smutty but still Jacket story proved. Oh well. There you go. It's smut, it's fluff, it's lurv. I loved writing it.

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His kisses are hot and fervent, greedy like he can't get enough of her, like he wants to suck her into himself. She relishes the sweetish taste of soda on his tongue, telling her that he hasn't been drinking, that for once he didn't reach for the false comfort of liquor but came to her. She loses herself in him again, his familiar smell intoxicating her mind, she wants to encompass him, her hands as impatient as his. They are a tangle of limbs, bare flushed skin rubbing against skin, clothes lost somewhere between her porch and the bed they used to share, quick shallow breathes mingling. When he lowers her to the sheets it strikes her how empty it felt without him here and how warm and alive and right his body feels against hers. This is where he belongs, where they both do.

His name is the only word on her lips as she whispers it over and over and her hands try to touch him everywhere at once, all the beloved textures, his hair and the hair on his chest and the bristle of his stubble. She can feel his desire, his want, his need for her, but it's as much for her body as it is for her heart. The heart that is breaking for him and that won't stop loving him and will always be his, she wishes he found a way to believe in it.

"Tell me you want me," he pleads suddenly, voice hoarse with emotion. And her heart is breaking a little more seeing him so crushed, so unsure and haunted. She cups his face in both hands, the despair and the tiny little twinkle of hope in his dark eyes pulling at all her heartstrings and erasing the last of the anger she felt for him for walking away from her.

"I want you, Jack," she states with emphasis, hoping her eyes tell him what the words are not enough to express. "All of you, any way I can have you." And she means it, she can't imagine not wanting to be one with him, to have him so close to her, to love him. "Want… you inside me..." she gasps just as he pushes in, the haste, the voracity unusual for him and she knows it's not lust that evokes them but his anguish.

"Oh Jack..." she moans his name, not really ready yet, his intrusion on the verge of being painful but she doesn't stop him, the feeling of his cock stretching her flesh shooting jolts of pleasure through her body. It's as tight a fit as they've ever been and she needs it as much as he does, to fill her up, make it real, connect them the way she hopes can bring him back to her.

"Want you... in my life..." she whispers, her lips skimming the funny shape of his earlobe that she kissed a thousand times.

His face buried in her hair, his movements sharp and graceless and forceful, like he's chasing something forever out of his reach and he doesn't speak, just huffs out ragged shaky groans as his hands clamp over hers, intertwining their fingers in a tight grip.

"I can't... oh God! –" he still hits her just right, just there, through his struggle to stay focused.

"I want... everything you have to give," she keeps talking to him, reassuring him, pulling him back.

He feels so good but his frustration, his pain, his desperate need to be accepted, taken in, validated somehow… It's all pouring out of him to engulf her.

"I love you," she breathes, "so much, Jack." You're everything to me, this has never changed.

His pace quickens on instinct and she knows he's close, unable to hold back and she finds she doesn't want him to, needing him to reach his solace within her.

"Kate...," he huffs with effort. "Please..."

He's asking her to come with him but she knows it won't happen, she's too distracted, can't focus on the wonderful sensations of his thrusts but she doesn't mind.

"It's okay, baby", she entices. "You're safe here." She tightens the hold her legs and arms have on him, cradling his body, enveloping him, offering a haven for him in her own body and wishing he can feel it, wishing he finds that peace of mind within her, wishing she could breathe it into him. You are loved.

"Let it all go..." she coaxes softly, stroking his shoulders, the tight knots of muscle in the nape of his neck. "Come inside me... I want you to… so bad..."

"Kate...," he grunts, anchoring her hips in place with one hand as he goes harder, faster, deeper, desperately --

"Yes, yes… that's it baby " is all she says, sensing he can't wait any longer and urging him to give in.

With a strained groan, his body jerks against her as he comes, the essence of his life seeping into her and then out in hot sticky spurts that she craves to dip her fingers into and lick off, or maybe push in deeper, to have him with her forever.

"I'm sorry," her hair muffles his words as he breathes into it. "It's been so long and...," there's so much shame and regret in his eyes when he looks into hers that she feels sorry for him.

"It's okay," she smiles, stroking his stubbly cheek.

"I'll make it up to you, I'll..."

"I know you will," she interrupts, beaming at him. She's just too happy to have him back in her arms. Spent and sated and hopeful anew. "I wanted this, don't worry about it anymore," her hands soothe his biceps. She just wants him to rest now, by her side.

His kiss is sweet and soft before he rolls off of her.

"I'm so tired," he lets out, his eyelashes casting a beautiful shadow over his face. And she knows he means his whole life, what became out of it. Laying her head on his chest, as he gathers her in his arms she presses a kiss to his collar bone.

"Go to sleep," she tells him softly, his heartbeat steady and comforting and she wants nothing more than to make sure it stays this way.