Title: Solstice
Rating: T
Summary: Takes place during the episode "Equinox, part I." Jealousy rears its ugly head when B'Elanna's ex-boyfriend Max Burke shows up. P/T.
A/N: Originally written Nov. 2000. This is one of the cheesier stories I've written (complete with cheesy chapter titles), but it's still entertaining. I must have been nostalgic about my college days when I wrote this.
Chapter 1: The Shortest Day
"B'Elanna! Max is here."
"I'll be right there," she called out, putting the finishing touches on her makeup.
Moments later, Mellie came into the room. "He's getting impatient," she informed her roommate with a smile.
B'Elanna rolled her eyes. What else is new?
"BLT!" a booming, masculine voice called out from just outside the door.
She smiled. BLT. He was the only one who called her that. It wasn't exactly the most romantic nickname, but she didn't mind all that much. She grumbled about it good-naturedly, but it didn't really bother her. She kind of liked it, actually. It wasn't the actual
nickname itself that mattered, but the affection behind it. The significance of having a nickname. It made her feel like she belonged. Special. That he cared about her. That they were that comfortable and familiar with each other. That was all it meant.
At any rate, it was certainly better than any of the standard endearments: "honey, dear, darling, sweetheart..." She certainly didn't like any of those. But "BLT" was okay. Especially since Max was the only one who called her that. He was entitled. He
was her boyfriend, after all.
They had met on a camping trip in Yosemite a few months ago. Max was a first-year cadet at the Academy, like her, and they had been introduced to each other by a mutual friend. Tall, dark and handsome, he had captivated her immediately. He was well-
built, strong, charming, and so attentive...
And she had welcomed, even encouraged his attentions.
She wasn't entirely sure what had possessed her to act so impulsively. After all, guys flirted with her all the time (the cadets were far more open-minded than the guys on her colony homeworld), but she rarely responded. What made this time different? Perhaps it had something to do with the romantic setting. The great outdoors, the star-studded night sky, the tranquility of the forests... It had been extremely cold that night, and he had gallantly offered her his sweater, the blue one with the class insignia on the back. She had gratefully accepted, and they had spent the rest of the evening in each other's company, talking quietly by the campfire.
Perhaps she had merely been on the rebound. It hadn't been that long ago that she had broken up with her first real boyfriend. A great guy, but clearly not the one for her. Their breakup had been rather messy, and she had vowed that she wouldn't get involved with anyone else for a long time. At least, not until she had recovered and was absolutely sure that she actually wanted to be with someone else.
But Max had changed all that. He understood what she was going through, having just gotten out of a bad relationship himself. They had spent hours commiserating, and it had brought them closer together. She felt so at ease with him.
Maybe it was a combination of all those things. But whatever it was, it had definitely established a bond between them.
The following day, they had gone hiking together to the magnificent waterfalls of Yosemite. At lunchtime they had been discussing their favorite sandwiches. His favorite was bacon, lettuce and tomato. BLT. Of course he had jokingly pointed out how similar that was to her initials... and started calling her that as a joke. She had rolled her eyes, but she was secretly flattered.
Months later, he was still calling her BLT.
B'Elanna finally opened the door, just as Max was about to knock again.
"It's about time," he grumbled. "What took you so long??
She pretended to be offended. "What? You don't think I'm worth waiting for?"
He looked her over appreciatively. "Well... okay. You're definitely worth waiting for."
"That's better."
They grinned at each other.
"Let's go; we don't want to be late."
"I thought you liked being fashionably late," she teased.
"Not this time. This is a surprise party, remember?"
Of course. It was his best friend's birthday, and Max had been planning this surprise party for weeks. Definitely a special occasion.
"Have fun," Mellie called out after them as they headed off to the party, arm in arm.
"B'Elanna?"
She snapped back to the present. "Hmm?"
"I asked you to hand me the isolinear spanner," said Harry patiently. "Twice."
"Oh." She did as he asked.
"Everything okay?"
"I guess."
He looked at her, guessing what was bothering her. "You and Max – Academy sweethearts, huh?"
She glared at him. "I wouldn't exactly call it that. We weren't together for that long."
"Okay, okay... Sorry."
So many memories. She rarely thought about her Academy days, but seeing Max had brought it all back. Like she was re-living it all over again. Seemed like only yesterday...
Dinners together, long walks, trips to San Francisco, going to parties, Academy sporting events, studying together...
He was the last person she had expected to see out here in the middle of the Delta Quadrant.
Ten years. Such a long time ago. She had been so different back then. Younger, more optimistic, more insecure, trying to fit in but not quite succeeding as well as she would have liked. Trying to figure it all out. Confused, wondering what it all meant, wondering
about her uncertain future... did she really want to be a Starfleet officer? At times she had her doubts whether she would even survive four years at Starfleet Academy.
She hadn't really known what she really wanted out of life, where she would eventually end up.
Max had been good company, but they were very different people. She certainly hadn't ever envisioned the two of them having a long-term relationship. They were too young for that, and too different.
It was completely different with Tom. She could easily imagine spending the rest of her life with Tom. They definitely had a future together.
The thought of that kind of commitment was a little frightening, but it was true. She could see the two of them still together years from now, even in ten years.
He was the love of her life.
She smiled a little, thinking about the scene in the Mess Hall, when Tom had discovered that Max was an ex-boyfriend of hers. His reaction to Max's old nickname for her, BLT, had been amusing, and she hadn't been able to resist teasing him about it. Tom was usually so unflappable, so confident. She secretly liked seeing him jealous. Just a little. It meant that he really cared about her. Not that she ever doubted that he cared about her. It was just a nice change, that was all. After all, it was usually the other way around. Tom was charming, good-looking, friendly, and people (beautiful women especially) tended to gravitate towards him. She couldn't help being a little envious of that. So it was reassuring to know that she wasn't the only one who ever felt insecure. He wasn't so arrogant that he didn't ever have doubts about himself.
B'Elanna loved him all the more for it. Tom might not be perfect, but he was certainly the perfect man for her.
And she loved him more than anything.
It hadn't been all good in her relationship with Max. Though they'd had a lot of fun together, there had also been quite a few bumps.
His most frequent complaint was that he didn't get to see her often enough. She was always busy with problem sets, programs, projects... and she was completely dedicated to her work. Such was the life of an engineer. She didn't always have as much time for him as he liked, and it was a sore point in their relationship.
She didn't like it either, but what could she do? She couldn't exactly cut down on her studying time and still expect to survive her grueling course load.
They saw each other as much as possible, but that was rarely enough to suit Max. He liked having her undivided attention.
Unfortunately, that didn't happen too often.
Sometimes she really resented the demands he made of her. He was so high-maintenance, and she hated feeling like she was had to choose between her studies and her boyfriend.
She could remember one incident in particular...
It was Sunday evening and the two of them were sitting on the floor of her dorm room. They were supposed to be studying, but it wasn't happening. Max was still in weekend mode and clearly not in the mood to study.
"Did you hear about Frank and Lacey? They broke up again."
Rifling through her lecture notes, she pretended not to hear him.
"She dumped him this time," Max continued, almost cheerfully. "It was brutal."
A non-committal "Mm-hmm..." was her only response.
"Don't you want to hear the gory details?"
"Not really."
He told her anyway.
B'Elanna tuned him out. After a few minutes, he realized that she really wasn't listening.
"Hey, you want to go down to the holodeck for a while?"
"Max. I'm trying to study," she reminded him pointedly.
He frowned. "You've been studying all weekend."
"Don't you have a Geophysics midterm tomorrow? And that Interstellar History paper that's due this week?"
"It'll get done," he said with a careless shrug. "And I already know I'm going to ace that midterm, so what's the point of studying?"
It was no use. She decided to just ignore him for now.
But he persisted. "If you don't want to go to the holodeck, how about going for a walk?"
"I don't think so."
"Why not? It's a beautiful evening. We shouldn't waste it cooped up inside."
She tried to concentrate on her problem set, but Max kept distracting her with his antics.
I'm never going to study with him again, B'Elanna told herself for the millionth time. This happened every time. It was counterproductive to try and study with him around. Why did I agree to let him come over in the first place?
Sensing her irritation, he dropped the subject and scooted closer to her, draping his arm around her shoulders.
"Well... I guess staying in might not be such a bad idea," he whispered, nuzzling her neck.
She pushed him away in exasperation.
"Max... I have work to do."
"Come on, B'Elanna," he cajoled.
She didn't like being pressured. It made her so uncomfortable. Problem was, she was tempted to give in.
It was like a power struggle, these games they played.
Sensing her hesitation, he pulled her to him and kissed her soundly.
Her anger returned full force. She wasn't about to let him manipulate her again. Not this time.
"Let go of me, p'taQ!"
*
It would never do, she thought glumly to herself later as she sat in the waiting room of the Academy Infirmary. No matter how angry she was, she couldn't go around breaking people's noses. Especially not her boyfriend's...
All this she remembered... She could laugh about it now, but back then it had been no laughing matter.
It wasn't like that with Tom. With him, she never felt like he had an ulterior motive or wanted something from her for his own selfish purposes. She wasn't giving in to his demands to get something else. To keep his interest.
Rather, it was an expression of their love for one another. Communication at another level.
He knew her well enough to gauge her moods, and he also knew when to back off.
B'Elanna was used to making her own decisions and being in control of her own life. She'd never liked having to rely on anyone. Didn't want to need anyone.
But somehow, it was all right to need Tom.
Before, she never would have let herself be vulnerable. Nothing terrified her more.
She had been independent and self-sufficient all her life. It was safer that way. Too many times she had been hurt by caring too deeply about someone or something. Caring about someone meant that they had the power to hurt you. She had always thought that relationships tended to be rather imbalanced since someone always had the upper hand. And she intended to be the one in control.
But with Tom it wasn't like that. She didn't need to have that control. She could let go, and she didn't have to hold back anything. She loved him, trusted him and wanted to share everything openly with him.
It didn't frighten her to be out of control with him. Quite the contrary. She always felt safe in his arms.
It had taken a long time to get to that point. Breaking down defenses that had been honed and refined all these years hadn't been easy for either of them.
But now that they had, everything was so perfect between them.
Tom...
B'Elanna suddenly had the urge to see him, but she knew that wouldn't be possible. She had too much work to do.
As she thought about her Academy days, she wondered what it would have been like had she known Tom then.
Perhaps it had all turned out for the best. Even if they had known each other then, would it have worked out between them?
She had changed a lot in the past ten years, as had Tom...
After months of constant arguing and misunderstandings Max and B'Elanna finally had to conclude that it just wasn't working.
Their breakup was fairly amiable. As amiable as a breakup could be.
She enjoyed his company, but she just didn't have enough time to deal with a boyfriend. Certainly not one as high-maintenance as Max Burke. He demanded way too much of her
time, resented that she prioritized her work over him, and he wasn't very understanding.
She understood where he was coming from, but there wasn't whole lot she could she do about it. She was an engineer, and engineering was the most difficult and time-consuming major there was at the Academy.
So they agreed not to see each other exclusively anymore. They were still friends, of course, but over time they saw less and less of each other. Max had always had a roving eye, even when they had been dating exclusively, so B'Elanna wasn't too surprised when he started seeing someone else soon after. She wasn't too heartbroken about it, either. Things hadn't been working out for a while, and she had her work to occupy her. There was always work to be done, and she didn't have time for a boyfriend at the moment. Her heavy and rigorous course load didn't permit her a lot of free time. She was taking quite a few advanced classes, and she was determined to do her best, even if that meant sacrificing other things.
"Engineering to Torres."
"Torres here."
It never ended. The life of an engineer was always busy. It always would be.
Good thing Tom was so understanding.
Though he occasionally complained about not getting to see her as often as he liked, he was usually very good-natured about it and willing to help her in any way possible. They worked well together.
She was grateful for the little moments... lunch together in the Mess Hall, walks along the beaches of Tahiti, working on the Delta Flyer, even watching episodes of Captain Proton...
After a long, hard day of work, it was nice to have someone to snuggle with on the couch. Blissful to fall asleep in the arms of the one you loved.
She closed her eyes for a moment, thinking back to a few nights ago...
That day, she and Harry had been held hostage in Sickbay by the sentient bomb that had taken over the Doctor. It had been a traumatic experience, to say the least.
But after it was over... Tom had been there to take care of her.
Her commbadge beeped again, interrupting her reverie.
"Bridge to Torres. Please report to Main Engineering."
"I'm on my way," she reported with a sigh. "Torres out."
There weren't enough hours in the day for her. Everything went by too quickly.
At least she would get to see Tom at dinner. She, Tom, Harry and Max were going to meet at the Mess Hall in a few short hours.
That brought a smile to her face.
(To be continued in Chapter 2…)