I hadn't realized what I had done was so terrible. I didn't realize it could cause such harm. Sending Jacob away had been hard and the severe mental storm of pain that had accompanied his departure had nearly ripped me apart. Being deprived of something as precious and magnificent as him was like the sun had suddenly deteriorated.
I did it because I couldn't handle seeing him cry anymore. I didn't want to hurt him more than I already had. I thought maybe if he stayed away from me, he would forget. I was horribly wrong.
I'm extremely ashamed and embarrassed with myself for throwing away a love as great as mine and Jacob's. I have given up my adoration for the boy, which is so brilliant and amazing in its strength, for an insignificant and pigheaded girl such as Isabella Swan.
When I had forced him away from me, I knew we were both in for a great deal of heartache, but I had not known it would be so horrible. I hadn't realized I was murdering him.
Neither Bella, nor I, had known Jacob had gone missing until two days after I had ended our love affair. We had been in sitting with Alice in the living area of my home, patiently sitting through one of Emmett's football games when the distinct scent of the Quileute Pack swept through the air.
Alice looked at me, confused and slightly worried, she cares for Jacob too. Emmett looks up from his game and stares at the door, hoping the smell was of his new friend coming back home, but I knew better. It was the other wolves.
Without a word, I walk out the front door and onto the lawn, Alice and Emmett following close behind. The whole pack is there, omitting that one wolf; my wolf. Their thoughts are a jumble of anger and misery and rage. All them ring out like a cry for help.
Where's Jake?
Why can't I hear him anymore?
Where has he gone?
I just want him to come back home.
Why…
They are just as distressed as I. I didn't understand at first. Why were they so worried? I didn't repel Jacob from his home as well as mine. Had I?
The alpha went behind a large tree, phased, and then came back. He looked furious. His face was flushed bright red under his russet skin and his nostrils were flared, but I could see extreme anxiety behind his eyes.
Now he standing only a couple feet, staring me down. Levelly wondering if he should be civil of tear me apart.
"What've you done, Cullen?" He voice is shaky and agitated. His stance accusing, and now that I think about, I deserve every shot they had ever took at me.
"I told him to leave me." My speech is clipped and low.
"I'm aware of that." His patience flew out the window before he arrived and he has no time for idle conversation. "He left. We don't know where he's gone… We can't even hear his thoughts anymore… You've broken him." His voice is feral and deathly quiet. Barely hanging onto his last bit of civility.
I can almost feel my eyes blacken and my dead heart gives a painful lurch. What have I done?
"You need to fix this, leech." I look up and realize another one had phased back. "He could be out somewhere hurt, or dead, and it's all your fault."
I nod and my feet are moving before I have time to think about it. I'm running into the house and searching for my keys, frantically grappling through my room until I find them, then racing down the stairs when Bella steps in my space and stops me on my way to the door.
"Edward, what are you doing?" Her voice grinds against my nerves and she arches that insufferable eyebrow. "Where are you going?"
I don't waste time and I don't feel like elaborating. "Bella, our relationship isn't working out. I think we need to see other people."
And I'm gone just like that. Running to my true love. Knowing that he is vulnerable and alone, but hoping he is unharmed and that I will not be too late.
I'm breaking it here to ask the readers how they would like it to end. Happy or sad? Should Edward save Jacob or should he be too late.
Comment and tell me how you would like this to end.