Hold My Heart

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Rizzoli & Isles or any of its characters (obviously, but just in case!)

A/N: Special thanks to my friend and amazing "beta" MegannRosemary even though she's way more than just a beta! I would have never been brave enough to finish and post this story without her. Thanks for all your encouragement and perfect comments and suggestions.

All those weeks when Maura was mad at her had been one of the worst times of her life; they had seemed like an eternally long and painful time. Not only she felt incredibly lonely, not having her best friend to talk to, but it was hell knowing that Maura hated her. And she knew she deserved it, she really had screwed up. Jane didn't think Maura was ever going to be able to forgive her and that thought alone made it hard to breathe. But after the near death experience they had both shared at the reservoir, they came to their senses and apologized to each other. Jane was so grateful to get another chance to make things right with Maura. She was so happy to be able to hug her best friend again. It was the best feeling in the whole world and she never wanted to let go….

Things were going well and their friendship was almost back to normal. Jane was back to teasing Maura and making her laugh. God that amazing laugh Maura has. Yeah things were good. Until the zombie…

"Maura, you really are going out with the zombie again? I mean, doesn't he kinda freak you out? He totally freaks me out!" Jane wasn´t able to hide how annoyed she was, even through sarcasm.

"No, he is actually quite nice Jane. I have a really good time with him." Maura replied, smiling.

"When you're not getting arrested... Sorry, um well have fun," she said with a hint of hurt in her voice and headed out the door.

"See you tomorrow Jane." Maura was left wondering what had gotten into her friend.

Jane left the precinct wondering why her chest felt so heavy and she really just wanted to punch something… or someone.

She drove home in silence walked into the apartment and plopped down on the couch. "Hi Joe... I'll walk you in a minute I promise. You know, I just got Maura back it really sucked not having her in my life. And now I feel like I'm losing her again…" she sighed. Joe stared at her, seeming to understand her owners' sadness.

While she was walking Joe, all she could think of was Maura… out on a date with the stupid zombie. I mean what could she possibly see in him? Maura deserved so much better. Maura deserved the best. Come to think about it, no one seemed to be good enough for Maura.

After getting back home, Jane grabbed a beer and sat on her couch, downing it. "I don't understand why I feel so crappy." She said to herself. Her eyes were tearing up. "What the hell Rizzoli, what's wrong with you? I must be coming down with something". She grabbed another beer and turned the tv on, not really watching anything. Commercials flickered by, tv shows blurred into one another, and beer after beer found their way into her hands. She lost track of all concepts of time and her conscious thoughts slipped away.

Maura was supposed to meet Jane at the Dirty Robber for a drink but she was not there. That was not like Maura at all to be late. She called her but she wasn´t answering her phone. After waiting for about 30 minutes Jane started to freak out thinking that something might have happened to her friend.

She left the Dirty Robber, got in her car and sped all the way to Maura's house. She didn´t even bother knocking and just used the key she had. She started searching the whole house, finding no one. "Maura? Where are you?" She called out. She tried calling her cell phone again, but it went straight to voice mail. Then she saw the note on the living room table her had shaking as she held it and read it out loud, "If you ever want to see your friend Dr. Isles again, you will do exactly as I say. Go to the abandoned warehouse by 7th street. Be there alone or else, the good Doctor will pay." Jane was terrified her heart was beating so hard it felt like it was going to jump out of her chest and the tightness on her chest making breathing a really difficult task. "No, God, don't let Maura get hurt… please".

She got to the warehouse as fast as humanly possible, she walked inside not really bothering to be quiet. She scanned the place and saw someone at the far end of the place on the floor, she knew it was Maura.

She ran to her as fast as possible, panicking as she saw Maura was lying in a pool of her own blood.

"NOOOO!" Jane screamed.

She sat straight up on the couch, her throat burning from her desperate scream, gasping for air her eyes wide with panic and shaking uncontrollably. She fought for a few minutes to get her breathing under control, but it proved harder than she thought. She wiped the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. "What the hell was that fucking nightmare about... Jesus! Maura is fine… she's probably still on her date… she's fine." She repeated trying to calm herself to no avail. She glanced at her watch, it was only around midnight. "I should go over and check up on her… God no, what the hell is wrong with me! I may interrupt something… maybe I'll call her? Damnit Rizzoli just forget about it, it was just a nightmare!" She tried to calm down and convince herself about the absurdity of being so shaken up by a nightmare, but she couldn't get rid of the tightness on her chest and decided she wouldn't be able to sleep all night if she didn't know Maura was ok. So she grabbed her cell, her hand still shaking and called her, breathing deeply to attempt to cover how scared she really was, she didn't want Maura to think anything was wrong. "Jane?" Maura answered sleepily.

"Maur, um I'm so sorry, did I wake you up? I guess I did…" Voice steady Rizzoli or she'll know something is up.

"Yeah, but it's ok. Are you ok?" Maura asked worrying now.

"Fine Maur, I thought you'd still be out on your date. I'm really sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep." Jane said feeling relieved, but still not able to shake the horrible nightmare off.

"Jane wait. Why did you call me?" Maura knew Jane too well to think that she´d call her in the middle of the night with no good reason.

"Um…." Shit, didn't think this far ahead, did you. "I just… didn't realize it was so late. It was nothing important, really."

"Jane. You know I can tell when you're lying. I don't know why you even try. Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do Maur! You know I do! It's just…. It's silly, ok? I just… had a nightmare." She finished almost a whisper.

"Oh Jane. Was it about Hoyt? Do you need me to come over?"

Jane couldn't help but smile a little at her friend. "No Maur, it wasn't about Hoyt. You really should go back to sleep, I'll see you in the morning ok?"

"Ok, if you're sure. You can call me anytime Jane, you know that right?"

"I know Maur. Thanks. Goodnight."

"Goodnight Jane."

Jane hung up the phone, feeling a bit relieved after hearing Maura's voice and knowing that she was ok. She knew she wasn't going to be able to sleep, and wished she had Maura sleeping next to her, that always managed to calm her down, but she wasn't going to bother her friend again. So she lay in bed awake with the horrible feeling of loss the nightmare had left her with. Images of Maura smiling and laughing alternated with images from her dream, ones she wished she had never seen, and they made her shiver. Trying to rid herself of those thoughts, her mind wandered to some of the moments she and Maura had shared. The first night she had slept over at Maura´s even though the circumstances had been scary, she always thought about that as a special night they had shared. She smiled to herself thinking how Maura always looked like she was going to walk down a Paris runway... It was going to be a very long night.

This will be a multi chapter story, I already have a few written out. Let me know what you think? :)