"You know something?" Minerva McGonagall asked, taking off her hat and
attempting to balance it on the back of her chair.
"What?" Albus Dumbledore replied.
"I think I'm drunk," she announced.
"I've known that for the past hour," Severus Snape commented from the corner he was sitting in.
"And how would you know?" she demanded.
"Oh," he shrugged, "just the fact that you've been SINGING for the past hour."
"The HILLS are alive!" She warbled. Snape put his head in his hands and started to laugh.
"This is just rich!" he managed to get out as Professor Flitwick levitated himself and bounced off the ceiling.
"Five professors at one of the most prestigious wizarding schools in the world are totally shit faced. We better hope none of those mangy brats called students wander in to the staff room!"
Just then Dumbledore emerged from the adjacent room with what looked like a pink bed sheet wrapped around his head.
"Look! I'm Quirrell!" he exclaimed.
"Yes, pink always did look better on him than purple," Flitwick said as he bounced off the door. There was a giggle from the corner opposite Snape, and Sybil Trelawney crawled out from the table she had been sitting under.
"This is fun!" She said. "Why don't we do this more often?"
"Probably because of the terrible hangovers we'll all have in the morning," Snape replied. "We'll all be crabby and take points off for no other reason than because we can."
"Oh!"
"Severus?" McGonagall asked.
"Yeah?" He replied. Dumbledore looked at Snape and shook his head. That boy really needed to stay out of Canada. He was starting to talk like them.
"Well. Try to no treat Gryffindor too badly, alright?"
"Here's a deal," he said instead. "How about I take points off of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw, and you take points off of Ravenclaw, Gryffindor and Hufflepuff?"
"Okay!" McGonagall replied happily, not realising that she had been hoodwinked. Then the light bulb clicked on. "Hey."
Snape just smirked while Dumbledore kept trying to keep his "Quirrell turban" from falling off; Trelawney had crawled back under her table, and Flitwick had managed to get tangled up in the ceiling fan and was laughing hysterically.
"Millions of peaches, peaches for me." McGonagall sang softly while looking at Snape with a cunning look in her eye. Snape was busy watching Flitwick and didn't notice her look.
"So, Severus," she began.
"What now?"
"I have a proposition for you."
"What?" he asked warily.
"A bet." He was just drunk enough to be curious about it.
"I bet that I can stay awake longer than you can tonight," she said. Snape thought about it for a moment.
"What are the stakes?" he finally asked.
"The girls' sex-ed class tomorrow."
Snape looked at McGonagall. She was starting to sway where she sat, and was looking at him fuzzily. He, on the other hand, was still raring to go.
"Sure," he finally said, fully confident that there would be no cheating. He realized his mistake when he saw her evil smile, and heard Dumbledore whisper something behind him. All of a sudden, all he wanted to do was curl up with that nice fuzzy kitty sitting on the ground a few feet away. The room was soon filled with the soft snores that announced he had lost the bet.
"That was evil, Minerva," Dumbledore said, watching the sleeping professor.
"I know," she replied with a laugh, and proceeded to fall asleep herself.
"What?" Albus Dumbledore replied.
"I think I'm drunk," she announced.
"I've known that for the past hour," Severus Snape commented from the corner he was sitting in.
"And how would you know?" she demanded.
"Oh," he shrugged, "just the fact that you've been SINGING for the past hour."
"The HILLS are alive!" She warbled. Snape put his head in his hands and started to laugh.
"This is just rich!" he managed to get out as Professor Flitwick levitated himself and bounced off the ceiling.
"Five professors at one of the most prestigious wizarding schools in the world are totally shit faced. We better hope none of those mangy brats called students wander in to the staff room!"
Just then Dumbledore emerged from the adjacent room with what looked like a pink bed sheet wrapped around his head.
"Look! I'm Quirrell!" he exclaimed.
"Yes, pink always did look better on him than purple," Flitwick said as he bounced off the door. There was a giggle from the corner opposite Snape, and Sybil Trelawney crawled out from the table she had been sitting under.
"This is fun!" She said. "Why don't we do this more often?"
"Probably because of the terrible hangovers we'll all have in the morning," Snape replied. "We'll all be crabby and take points off for no other reason than because we can."
"Oh!"
"Severus?" McGonagall asked.
"Yeah?" He replied. Dumbledore looked at Snape and shook his head. That boy really needed to stay out of Canada. He was starting to talk like them.
"Well. Try to no treat Gryffindor too badly, alright?"
"Here's a deal," he said instead. "How about I take points off of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw, and you take points off of Ravenclaw, Gryffindor and Hufflepuff?"
"Okay!" McGonagall replied happily, not realising that she had been hoodwinked. Then the light bulb clicked on. "Hey."
Snape just smirked while Dumbledore kept trying to keep his "Quirrell turban" from falling off; Trelawney had crawled back under her table, and Flitwick had managed to get tangled up in the ceiling fan and was laughing hysterically.
"Millions of peaches, peaches for me." McGonagall sang softly while looking at Snape with a cunning look in her eye. Snape was busy watching Flitwick and didn't notice her look.
"So, Severus," she began.
"What now?"
"I have a proposition for you."
"What?" he asked warily.
"A bet." He was just drunk enough to be curious about it.
"I bet that I can stay awake longer than you can tonight," she said. Snape thought about it for a moment.
"What are the stakes?" he finally asked.
"The girls' sex-ed class tomorrow."
Snape looked at McGonagall. She was starting to sway where she sat, and was looking at him fuzzily. He, on the other hand, was still raring to go.
"Sure," he finally said, fully confident that there would be no cheating. He realized his mistake when he saw her evil smile, and heard Dumbledore whisper something behind him. All of a sudden, all he wanted to do was curl up with that nice fuzzy kitty sitting on the ground a few feet away. The room was soon filled with the soft snores that announced he had lost the bet.
"That was evil, Minerva," Dumbledore said, watching the sleeping professor.
"I know," she replied with a laugh, and proceeded to fall asleep herself.