A/N: Pre-series; contains violence and sexual themes.
"Mikage?" I stirred in my sleep as I buried my face into a pillow while tugging the blanket over my head. I already knew who was asking for me as well as the time. He always stayed up later than I ever do, so I should be used to it by now. Curling into a tight ball, I kept my eyes shut tight. Jack would be angry with me, I'm sure, but I really didn't feel like getting up right now. "Are you awake?" But I guess I'll have to.
Sighing, I pushed the sheets aside and pushed myself up with my forearms before giving up and laying on my side. Rubbing my eyes, I shifted my gaze from my alarm clock (which read 3 am) to my superior. His form was a bit hazy for a moment; it also didn't help that my room was dark. A couple minutes passed as I forced myself awake while my eyes adjusted to the dark.
Unable to handle it, I reached over and flipped the switch to the lamp on the night stand on.
"Atlus-sama what do you need for me to—"
My blood ran cold at what I saw.
Jack stood in my doorway with a face as white as fresh snow. His body was shaking terrible as if he had been blast with winter air against his bare skin. I saw that his left hand was gripping onto my doorframe so tightly his knuckles were turning the same color as his face. The blonde was trying to say something although nothing came out. But I was more terrified of the blood dripping from his nose with a black eye and cuts accentuating it. My heart began to beat erratically in my rib cage as I threw my sheets off of my body before jumping from my bed and running over to him.
I forced my body to slow down when I was just a footstep away from him. The scent of copper hit me first as I tilted my head up to meet his face. I let out a sharp gasp as I saw how severe his wounds really were then.
Droplets of blood were scattered along his features, on his clothes, and in his hair. The blood coming from his nose was smeared across as I saw Jack wipe it away with the back of his sleeve. The cuts were deeper than what I initially saw with his eye swelling shut every second.
My body moved on its own as I held my hands out, which were shaking, as I stared up at him terrified. It felt as if my room suddenly dropped drastically in temperature and it wasn't helping that I was in a nightgown. Forcing my hands back, I wrapped them around me. "W-What happened…" I cried softly while holding back the urge to cry.
It felt as if a crack had been made to my heart when he shrugged at my question. Biting back a scream, I slowly whisper quietly, "Jack…p-please tell m-me…" My vision blurred then and I knew tears were threatening to leak out, but I forced them back. Once it went back to normal, I shook my head before unwrapping my arms from my shoulders and motioned downwards with my hands. "Stay here."
Jack simply nodded at my request. I would have been overjoyed that he was finally listening for a change if not for why he was doing so. I motioned my hands once more before turning on my heels and running across the room and into the bathroom. I fell to my knees and tore open the cabinet door open and began rummaging around as quickly as I could. I felt a bit of weight being lifted off my shoulders when I pulled out the first aid kit.
The feeling was fleeting as I snatched it from where it sat and pushed myself up to get back to Jack. I let out a sharp gasp when I saw he no longer stood in my doorway. "Altus…Jack?" I cried as I ran out of the room and out towards the large living area. A cry of joy became caught in my throat at the sight of the back of his head and spiky blonde locks from the couch.
Slowing my pace down, I quickly trotted around the couch before sitting to the left side of him. I saw that the blood had not slowed as some of it had dribbled onto his pants, but then I saw that some of the couch had been splattered with his sleeve redder than I remember. "Atlus-sama…" I began softly though my tone changed quickly when I saw he was about to wipe the blood away again with his sleeve. "No, don't do that." I chided as my hand curled around his wrist; then forced his arm down. He slid his gave over at me, fear lingering his eyes. I sighed. "You'll only make it worse…"
I kept a firm hold of his wrist so he wouldn't attempt to clear the blood away while my free hand opened the First Aid kit in my lap and took out a soft square cloth. Biting my bottom lip, I lifted my hand and placed it against his nose. I then pulled the arm I was holding down, and had him hold the cloth. "Keep it there. I'll be right back."
Rising from my seat, I threw a glance over my shoulder as I left the couch and saw he was doing as I said. I pushed aside the feeling of my heart continue to crack in two as I made my way into the kitchen and collected one wet and one dry towel before heading back. Again, I saw he did was he was told. Part of me wished, at that moment, he would behave like this all the time, but then he wouldn't be the Jack I know and care deeply for. One could even say I love him, but I wouldn't say it.
I took my seat beside him once more and began wiping away the blood on his face while making a mental note to clean his clothes as quickly as I could before the stains became permanent. He flinched a few times as I cleaned him off. Shooting him a tiny smile, I placed the towel onto the coffee table before tending to his noise. "You can stop doing that." I stopped myself from laughing a bit at the horrified expression his face, but it quickly faded as I pulled his hand and the cloth down before pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment. He looked down at me curiously as I did this.
Unpinching his nose, I smiled. "Better." For the most part I should have said, but I didn't want to frighten him anymore than he was as he was still shaking like a leaf. I snatched the wet cloth off the table once more and began cleaning his upper lip. "It's not bleeding before you ask, Atlus-sama." I whispered softly when I saw him peering down at me, but more so to see if I was wiping up blood.
Once his face was clean of any blood, I began tending to his cuts which were easy as I sprayed disinfect into them. He cringed as gripped his thigh, but he never let out a cry as I did this. After placing band-aids onto his cuts, I tended to his black eye as best I could with a small ice pack. Thank god he didn't have a duel for a few days or it would have been a nightmare.
My lips tugged into a frown as I saw I missed a few spots of blood and began tending to that. It had slid down his chin; he must have tilted his head back in hopes that would stop the bleeding. I mentally shook my head as I continued to clean before my body froze for a third time with my eyes widening in horror.
His collar had concealed an ugly purple bruise on his neck that appeared as if someone had used one hand to make the mark.
"J-Jack…your neck…" I whimpered softly as I pulled my hand back quickly, afraid I would somehow hurt him even more. Jack wore a mask of confusion before realizing what I meant. His shoulders slumped with his eyes falling to the floor and his hands laying in his lap. "I…I was hoping you wouldn't notice."
I did a double take.
His voice…it was so meek and quiet. It sounded so alien coming from him.
"Jack, who did this?" His eyes rose to meet mine before looking away quickly. My chest tightened as I saw shame in his violet eyes.
Oh Jack…
Quietly, I placed a hand onto his back and began rubbing it gently. "Jack…you don't have to be afraid." My voice was sincere and gentle which appeared to be what he needed as eyes met mine.
"Promise me first you won't tell." My heart sank into the pit of my stomach at those words. I couldn't say anything so I nodded. Lowering my gaze for a moment, I saw he was wringing his hands with his knee bouncing lightly. "Jack?"
I heard him sigh as he hung his head low. "Godwin."
My stomach lurched as if I had been punched. Godwin…the name wasn't registering with me. He had been the one to invite Jack into the city. The man had become obsessed with obtaining him since I started working for him since I was eighteen. And the moment he obtained the blonde, he gave Jack whatever he desired. He acted more like a father than a manager.
He had shined light in Jack's life, but now he knew the dark truth.
A truth I had discovered long before him and dealt with on a basis. I have seen his rage first hand; I also have the bruises and mental scarring to prove. But…but I never expected him to lay a hand on Jack. His so called prodigy.
"What happened?" I asked softly as he threw me a horrified glance. I bit my bottom lip. "Unless…unless you don't want to talk about it…" I waited for him to respond, but he didn't. "Atlus-sa—" "You believe me?"
I should have known. Nodding, I stopped rubbing his back before clasping my hands around one of his. "I do…"
He raised a brow. "And you want to know what happened?"
Part of me didn't, but part of me needed to know. "I do."
Sighing, he lowered his gaze from mine once more. I was about to tell him there was nothing to be ashamed of when he started to speak. "It was a few hours ago. I was in his office, watching him and Jaeger talk about something. What, I can't remember but it was about business or something. Somehow I was brought up though I was ignored for half of it. When ten minutes passed, I decided to leave but Godwin told me to stay back. I wanted to go home and sleep…I don't know what I said, but whatever I said pissed him off." He stopped for a moment, and I allowed him some time to collect his thoughts. "He said something under his breath which led me to asking him what he said. It led into an argument over it; I must have said something cause he went quiet."
He stopped once more. I began tapping my knee lightly as I waited for him to go on. "And then?"
Jack shrugged. "I thought that was the end of it, so I was walking out to leave when out of nowhere he had me up against the wall by the throat." I fought back tears and the urge to hug him as he continued on and said that they minced words and the older man began beating him. Jack also said that if it hadn't been for Jaeger for begging Godwin to stop, he might have continued. After that, Jack fled. He had been driving home, but had to stop every so often as the black eye started to take effect.
"Oh Jack." I cried softly as my hands tightened around his. He shrugged. "It's…it's no big deal." His body shook as he said this; I felt as if he was trying stop himself from crying.
"I didn't expect him to do that. Normally he would let me say anything I wanted." Jack added as he looked out the grandiose windows the room sadly. "I don't know what made him snap."
My mind began to recall reasons I have used in the past to defend my boss' behavior: stress, medicine he was taking, teaching a lesson, etc. The list went on.
But there was nothing I could say that could justify what he had done this night. "He's…he's not such a kind man Jack." I replied back with him snorting at my comment. "Obviously," He snapped with bitterness in his voice.
Jack then looked at me with fear in his eyes. "You're not going to tell…are you?"
I shook my head. "No Jack, I promised you." Besides, who would believe us? I saw a wave of relief wash over him when I said this. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." I gave him one of my most sincere smiles. I was happy he had calmed down, but the bruises he had kept that joy at a minimum. "I'm here if you need to talk, Atlus- Oh!" My cheeks grew warm as I was encompassed into a bear hug by Jack. I looked around, wondering if I was just imagining this, but the sound of his heart beating and him squeezing me tightly told me I wasn't.
Quietly I returned the hug, but sadly it ended quickly. We released one another, and I now saw anger in his features. I shivered at the look. "Mikage?" I tilted my head to the side. "Yes?"
"Can you answer me something, honestly?" I raised a brow. "Has he ever hurt you?"
"W-What?"
"Has Godwin ever hurt you?"
I was quiet for a moment. I shook my head as I replied quietly, "No, he has never laid a hand on me." Jack nodded at my response taking it as truth. "Good, at least he has some dignity left in him."
The crack that had been done to my heart quickly spread before my heart shattered completely. I lied to him. Blatantly and utterly lied to him, and he believed me. It was for the best though. I didn't need him worrying for me. If he knew what things Godwin had done to me, he would be utterly terrified, or worse he might do something and risk getting hurt.
I can't let him do that. Seeing him get hurt because of me would be far worse than anything Godwin could do. Wounds can heal, but losing someone you care about will never fade.
"I'm afraid of him." Jack's words snapped me out of my thoughts. I was surprised my heart could still break even after it was in a million pieces. "Jack…"
"What if he does it again?"
"He won't. It would be too much of a risk."
"But what if he does?"
"He won't."
"But what if he does?"
I opened my mouth, but there was nothing I could say for he was right. After what had occurred tonight, we know not of how in control Godwin was with his emotions. A terrifying thought if you think about it. "I…I don't know…"
A squeak left me as I saw Jack, shaking again, lower himself onto the couch and against my lap. "I don't want to go back…I don't want to be in the same room with him…But I don't have a choice." He buried his face into my stomach with his arms wrapped around my waist; he wasn't crying but his body continued to shake.
Fighting back the tears, I gently trailed my fingers along his back as a way to comfort him. And before I knew it, I arched my back and rested my form against his back, still trailing my fingers along his spine. "It'll be okay, I promise. I'm not going to let him hurt you."
His body continued to shake for some time though. It wasn't until the first few rays of light hit did he finally fall asleep. Smiling at this, I sat upright. My head whipped around at the sound of a door opening and closing with my heart leaping into my throat.
"Godwin-sama…" The man raised a brow at me as he walked over to where I and Jack sat. He was not pleased to see the position we were in.
"Why is Jack down here and not in his room, Sagiri-san?" I heard the smug tone beneath his usually calm voice. I wanted to scream at him. Throw a vase at him. Something to get revenge for Jack. But in doing so, I would invoke his wrath. So I sat there like a quiet mouse as a cat stalked closer.
Godwin took one step towards us, and I saw a malicious look in his eyes directed towards Jack. I saw how his eyes slid between me and the blonde and how we were situated. I saw a hint of jealousy in his eyes briefly. He took another step towards us; I reluctantly pulled myself from Jack. I made sure he did not awaken, thank god he was a heavy sleeper, and gently placed the left side of his head down onto the couch allowing him to breathe.
"Mikage." I shivered as his words ghosted against my form. I gave Jack one last look before moving towards the other man. "Godwin-sama." I saw agitation flash across his face as I gave him a low bow. He motioned with his index finger for me to follow with us leaving Jack to sleep.
We walked down the hall but stopped midway. I stood behind him and saw he was shaking his head. "I hired you to keep an eye on him, but instead I find you laying with him." He turned halfway with his eyes narrowed into slits. I lowered my head in shame. "Well? What do you have to say for yourself?"
He let out a muffled cry as I slipped towards him and slipped my arms around his neck to pull myself up and pressed my lips against his. Godwin's surprise didn't last long as I felt his muscular arms wrap around me in a death grip before I was shoved against a wall. I allowed him to ravage and dominate my body with hard thrusts and touches. I was used to it though.
I had done a deed that would forever haunt me. There was no turning back after this.
I had kept my promise to Atlus-sama; he would be safe…for now.
For how long…it depended on if I could keep Godwin entertained and he kept his temper under control.
A/N: Something I have had on my mind recently; decided to write it out. And this was my first real time working with First Person fully and completed work. Started some though I never finished them. Practice and experiment are good devices in improving your writing. Also, these four including Akutsu are my fave characters in this series.
