Finn was utterly confused. "Wait, where are you going?"
"To find Puckerman. You know, my journey from little princess to natural woman begins this Saturday night at my house." Puck thinks I'm this dainty little Jewish American Princess? Well, he's about to see another side of his "princess" and this side gets exactly what she wants.
Rachel left the choir room on a tear. Puck couldn't have gotten far. He was totally right. What kind of parents would leave a 16 year old girl at home by herself for a whole week? The kind of parents who have a goody-goody boring daughter, that's who. If she was going to write this song, she needed more crazy teenage experiences to draw from and there was only one person she knew would be willing to help her. Puck may ditch every class on his schedule, but he was an ace when it came to living each moment to the fullest.
She saw him walking down the hall towards his locker and rushed to catch up to him. "Puckerman! I need your help. I'm having trouble drawing on personal experiences to write a compelling song for Regionals. I changed my mind about the party. Can you make it happen?"
She looked up at him with a determined look in her eyes which would probably scare most guys away, but he found it so cute that she was so determined to be bad. "Your wish is my command, princess. I'll get everyone there, you make sure that we have all the refreshments we need."
"Done. I'll see you on Saturday Puckerman."
She practically skipped her way to her next class and it made him so happy to see her with that spring back in her step. She'd been moping around since Finn dumped her for the third official time, and he was glad that it seemed like she was on her way back to her old self, but what was with this Puckerman business? She hasn't called him Noah in a long time, and he missed it. He didn't let anyone except his mom, sister, and Nana call him Noah, but when she did, it felt good. That feeling he got when she called him Noah seemed to keep him grounded and reminded him that someone saw him as more than a badass screw-up. When they were doing their party line to discuss the party, Santana had called him Noah and it made his stomach turn. He needed to talk to her about that later.
In true Rachel Berry fashion, she managed to prove how out of touch she was with her inner teenager. The party was one huge suckfest! And what was she wearing? It seriously seemed like she raided an early 19th century closet. He could see that everyone was regretting coming and that he was going to get all the flak for this dismal failure. He saw Mike, Tina, Artie, and Brittany conspiring to get out of there and decided to step in and kick this party up a notch.
A couple of hours and several bottles later, everyone was having a blast. Puck was drinking and having fun, but played it cool to keep an eye on things. Once she loosened up, Rachel was actually a lot of fun. He dared her to chug a wine cooler. She handled it like a champ and belched like a pro, which normally might gross him out, but for some reason he found it adorable. Everyone was going nuts drinking and he wanted to have fun, but still be able to keep an eye on things. Rachel was well on her way to getting plastered, but was being clingy to Finn.
Puck was in the midst of getting reamed by Quinn and Lauren, and noticed Finn's demeanor towards Rachel change. Looks like Hudson was being a douche yet again and Rachel looked like she was ready to unload on him. In a surprising move, she got up and suggested they play Spin the Bottle. That's his girl…don't dwell on that dopey giant anymore and focus on having fun. Plus, who knows where that bottle might land? Finn couldn't get mad at him if the bottle gods decided to smile on him tonight.
Damn! That queer canary is one lucky SOB. For a guy who doesn't like girls, he sure seems to know what he's doing. Hudson's a freaking tool because he doesn't even care that he let her slip through his fingers. If she bites that queer canary's lip, he won't be responsible for what comes next, because that move is reserved for him.
The rest of the party was a blur. Puck vaguely remembered Rachel and that queer canary singing a duet, and he remembered pretending that she was singing to him instead of what's his name. Drunk Rachel was tons of fun and really flirty. He had to figure out a way to make it a party for two like he originally wanted. No one had stayed to clean up, so he figured he would lend a hand.
Puck walked up the Berry house just as Kurt was leaving. Rachel was surprised but happy to see him. He had a box filled with several bottles and was relieved to be able to stock things so quickly after the party so her dads wouldn't suspect a thing.
He went straight to the liquor cabinet and started restocking it. "Turned out to be a great party, Berry. Even if it did suck in the beginning."
"Well Puckerman, I have to say that I'm so glad that you suggested the party in the first place. I had a lot of fun."
"What's with this Puckerman business? You mad at me or something?"
"No. Why would you think that?"
"The last time you called me that was when I made that joke about fromunda cheese and that was 'cuz you were pissed about your breakup with that L.A. fairy."
"I don't know I guess I thought it was the cool thing to do. I mean, everyone else calls you Puckerman."
"Since when have you ever thought you were in the same class as everyone else? I like it when you call me Noah. It just feels good. Santana called me that the other day and it just didn't feel right. I had to set her straight on the matter."
Her heart melted a little bit after hearing him say that. She had it on good authority that the only people allowed to call him Noah were his mom, sister, and his Nana. She felt honored that he didn't just allow her to call him that, but that he preferred it. She had to contain her giddiness at the adorableness of him at the moment.
They finished stocking the cabinet and realized that he had brought one too many bottles of tequila. "Here you go. You got extra tequila."
"Well, I can't take it home. My mom's been on my case since I got thrown into juvie so she goes through all my stuff."
"What am I going to do with it? My dads are going to know something's up if they see an extra bottle of tequila lying around."
He saw his shot, so he took it. "There is one way to get rid of the evidence." He flashed his trademark Puckerman smile and eyebrow raise. "We didn't take a shot together at the party. We should celebrate our success as partners in crime."
Puck made his way over to the bar to get two shot glasses and filled them up. "Okay Rach, you remember how to do this? Lick your wrist and sprinkle the salt, then lick the salt, take the shot, and bite the lime."
"Got it." They took the shot together and Rachel scrunched her face in disgust.
"Don't worry, tequila takes a while to get used to. The first shot is always the worst. It gets easier after this, and you better get used to it, 'cuz we've got a whole bottle to finish."
The first shot really was the hardest. After that she was a pro. Three shots later they took a break to catch their breath and he asked why Kurt was over earlier.
"Well, he came under the guise of helping me clean up, but he really wanted to get the details on my date with Blaine."
His heart felt like it dropped into his stomach. She went on a date with that guy? "You went out with that queer canary?"
She rolled her eyes. "Yes, I did go out with him and we had a great time."
"I thought he was as gay as the day is long."
"He's experimenting. Besides, we both felt something when we kissed at the party."
His jealousy was rising to the surface fast so he covered by pouring more shots for them. Two shots later he got the nerve to ask, "Why are you wasting time with gay guys anyway? There are plenty of straight guys that would be happy to get with you."
"Really…Like who?"
He remembered his promise to Finn so he couldn't bring himself to say that he would be happy to jump on the Rachel Berry train, so he covered. "I just know that there are plenty of guys that would appreciate you more than that dopey giant."
"What is it with you making fun of all the guys that I date? L.A. Fairy, Queer Canary, and Dopey Giant? Really Noah, you can't be more mature and supportive of me?"
"I just know that you deserve better."
"Well, I feel the same about you. Let's take a look at your dating history. Satan, Sister Quinn, and now the Bone Crusher? They all treat you like crap, Noah, especially Lauren. Why are you wasting your time with her?"
"Well, it's not like I have a choice…" His voice trailed off and he turned away so he didn't have to look her in the eyes.
She could tell that he didn't want to say any more on the subject so she switched gears. "Noah, how did you know that my dads were out of town? I wasn't aware that they told anyone outside of their bosses that they were going."
He answered without hesitation. "Well, they told my mom because they asked her to check in on you. She promised that she would, but then had to leave town to help my aunt in Michigan and took my sister with her, so she asked me to look after you."
She never pegged him as a mama's boy. "Well, thank you for being my knight in shining armor and also for saving the party by making sure that everyone stayed. You're such a great friend. I know you don't want to talk about Lauren anymore, but can I just say how disappointed I was that you sang her a song on Valentine's Day? That performance was hot and she didn't even give you the time of day. Then she makes you back her up on her anthem and wouldn't even kiss you at the end. I just wanted to smack some sense into her when she called you a sucker."
At this point, Puck wondered if it was just the alcohol talking. He promised Finn he'd stay away, but if she even gave him the slightest indication that she wanted him he knew he'd take it. He was just trying to figure out if that's what she was doing or if she was just complimenting him as her friend.
They made it to the last shot of the bottle. Rachel was already plastered and was being very flirty. Noah was drunk too, but seemed to be holding on pretty well. Rachel felt the need to coach him on how to take a shot. "All right now..lick it, slam it, suck it!"
All of a sudden Puck was turned on by that. Rachel summing up the process like that was even hotter than Santana doing a body shot off of Brittany. He was dangerously close to chucking his friendship with Finn out the window, but still he held back. She noticed his hesitation and called him on it. "Noah, you don't really want to be with Lauren, do you?"
She looked up at him with such a naïve sincerity and he just couldn't lie to her. "No, but I can't really go after who I want because I promised Finn…"
"What does Finn have to do with any of this?"
"Well he was a bit upset that we sang "Need You Now" together and so I told him the truth. I told him that you only asked me to do the duet with you because you wanted to make him jealous, and I promised him that nothing like that would ever happen again."
She couldn't believe that he didn't think that the duet didn't mean as much to her as it obviously did to him. "For the record, that duet may have started out as a way to make Finn jealous, but did you notice that once I got over it, it was all about you? I really do wonder if I ever cross your mind. And right now, well it's not a quarter after one, but I am a little drunk and I need you now." She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him closer. "You promised Finn you wouldn't try to make him jealous again, but this isn't about him, is it?"
Even drunk her logical reasoning made complete sense. He knew he wouldn't have another chance like this again, so he leaned in even closer and whispered in her ear. "Rachel, does my face taste awesome?"
She knew it. He was jealous of her kiss with Blaine. "Well, it has been a while. I'll have to refresh my memory." She brought her finger to his lips and traced them before taking the lime and placing it between his lips, ready for her when she was done with the shot. She could feel the electricity between them. She tilted his head to the side and took a long and slow lick on his neck, just underneath his jawline. Noah's head was completely cloudy. Their makeout sessions were hot, but they didn't even blip on his radar compared to this moment. She shook some salt on him and licked him again. She slammed the shot and gunned straight for the lime between his lips. He was still in a daze and the lime fell from his lips before she could get to it and their lips crashed together. It was like fire meeting ice and they both melted into the kiss. There was such a sense of urgency and longing in this kiss and that's what set it apart from their previous kisses, that and the fact that there wasn't a third person in this kiss, like there had been before.
They reluctantly broke away from each other and stared at each other for a few moments. "Better than awesome Noah. Your face is delectable."