Disclaimer/Authors Note: Don't ask where this little side trip into insanity came from, but I will tell you this: it's a mockery of my brother's phone calls. Knowing this may not help you understand the story, but I'm hoping it will be funny anyway. I don't own any of the characters or places created in FF VIII by Squaresoft and I don't have permission to use them. No copyright infringement is intended by this and if anyone from Square is out there reading this, I beg you: PLEASE DON'T SUE!!! I'm a poor girl! I have no money and I am making none off of this story. Well, that said, lets get into the *ahem* "story". Heeheehee …
"An Inane Phone Call"
Written by Skylark Starflower
Started January 14, 2001
Finished January 14, 2001
Selphie Tilmitt sat on the edge of the bed, her feet tracing wide arcs in the air as she clutched the receiver of the phone to her ear. After the defeat of Ultimecia, Trabia Garden had been rebuilt, and new Garden's were springing up around the globe. Selphie had returned to Trabia for a visit.
Back in Balamb Garden, on the other end of the line, Irvine Kinneas sat in a ratty looking swivel chair. His feet were propped up on the only desk to decorate the small dorm room he had been granted use of until such time that he would return to Galbadia Garden. He stared at the wall. The blank, white wall. It was the only thing worth staring at in the whole room.
"So, am I missing anything exiting? Any explosions?" asked Selphie.
"Uh uh," Irvine grunted in response, shaking his head as though Selphie could see him.
Silence ruled the line for about ten straight minutes.
"Nmmy," Irvine grumbled, feeling the silence had lasted too long.
Silence again.
Selphie grinned. It was great to talk on the phone and sit about listening to each other breathe for a whole hour!
"So, how are all your friends down there doing?" asked Irvine.
"Okay," replied Selphie, and then the silence moved in to take over the conversation again.
Irvine grunted something after a few moments had passed that Selphie didn't quite catch.
"Say again?"
"Mmnhy."
"Oh, okay!"
A hush fell upon the two conversationalists. Neither spoke again for about five minutes.
Selphie breathed in, Irvine breathed out. Selphie breathed out, Irvine breathed in. This continued for another five minutes.
"So, Squall and Rinoa set a date yet?" asked Selphie. Irvine snorted in laughter. He quickly regained his composure, though, and silence held sway again.
A minute of silence passed. Then another, until five minutes had gone by in total silence, and neither of the two chatterboxes seemed ready to break it just yet.
A good twenty minutes passed before Irvine spoke again.
"When are you coming back, Sefie?"
"Soon!"
The silence snuck up from behind. It quietly crouched, preparing for the pounce.
"Nrmm," grunted Irvine, as though Neanderthals had raised him. And that was when the silence made its move. Pouncing with deadly accuracy, it grabbed Irvine's throat, as its counterpart did the same to Selphie in Trabia, effectively ending anything further the two were about to say.
Silence and its counterpart, Quiet, finally relinquished their holds on Selphie and Irvine after ten minutes, discovering that the two didn't taste so good.
"Well, it was great hearing from you, Sefie. See you when you get back."
"Yeah, Irvy. See you! Bye!" Selphie chirruped happily, and both hung up, ending one of the most inane phone calls that had ever occurred, next to the time when Dr. Odine had called his mother collect one night.
The End
"An Inane Phone Call"
Written by Skylark Starflower
Started January 14, 2001
Finished January 14, 2001
Selphie Tilmitt sat on the edge of the bed, her feet tracing wide arcs in the air as she clutched the receiver of the phone to her ear. After the defeat of Ultimecia, Trabia Garden had been rebuilt, and new Garden's were springing up around the globe. Selphie had returned to Trabia for a visit.
Back in Balamb Garden, on the other end of the line, Irvine Kinneas sat in a ratty looking swivel chair. His feet were propped up on the only desk to decorate the small dorm room he had been granted use of until such time that he would return to Galbadia Garden. He stared at the wall. The blank, white wall. It was the only thing worth staring at in the whole room.
"So, am I missing anything exiting? Any explosions?" asked Selphie.
"Uh uh," Irvine grunted in response, shaking his head as though Selphie could see him.
Silence ruled the line for about ten straight minutes.
"Nmmy," Irvine grumbled, feeling the silence had lasted too long.
Silence again.
Selphie grinned. It was great to talk on the phone and sit about listening to each other breathe for a whole hour!
"So, how are all your friends down there doing?" asked Irvine.
"Okay," replied Selphie, and then the silence moved in to take over the conversation again.
Irvine grunted something after a few moments had passed that Selphie didn't quite catch.
"Say again?"
"Mmnhy."
"Oh, okay!"
A hush fell upon the two conversationalists. Neither spoke again for about five minutes.
Selphie breathed in, Irvine breathed out. Selphie breathed out, Irvine breathed in. This continued for another five minutes.
"So, Squall and Rinoa set a date yet?" asked Selphie. Irvine snorted in laughter. He quickly regained his composure, though, and silence held sway again.
A minute of silence passed. Then another, until five minutes had gone by in total silence, and neither of the two chatterboxes seemed ready to break it just yet.
A good twenty minutes passed before Irvine spoke again.
"When are you coming back, Sefie?"
"Soon!"
The silence snuck up from behind. It quietly crouched, preparing for the pounce.
"Nrmm," grunted Irvine, as though Neanderthals had raised him. And that was when the silence made its move. Pouncing with deadly accuracy, it grabbed Irvine's throat, as its counterpart did the same to Selphie in Trabia, effectively ending anything further the two were about to say.
Silence and its counterpart, Quiet, finally relinquished their holds on Selphie and Irvine after ten minutes, discovering that the two didn't taste so good.
"Well, it was great hearing from you, Sefie. See you when you get back."
"Yeah, Irvy. See you! Bye!" Selphie chirruped happily, and both hung up, ending one of the most inane phone calls that had ever occurred, next to the time when Dr. Odine had called his mother collect one night.
The End