"How's it goin', Fuckface?"

Oz looked up with a smirk at Stifler, who stuck his tongue out, waggled it and grinned. "Time for the tally; that extra-special time of year when we compare how many chicks we've boned. What've you got to say for yourself? You and choir-chick still going at it?"

Oz groaned good-naturedly and stood up from his seat on a bench near the Library Hall. "Yeah, yeah. Joke all you want, Stifler. It still doesn't change the fact that I've got something with a girl you'll probably never have."

"I've got something you will absolutely never have. A pair of balls."

The two laughed as they walked down to the parking lot. The blonde opened his car door and yelled to Oz, who was nearing his own vehicle.

"Hey, is Jim coming to the lake?"

"Nah, he and Michelle are going to Band Camp together," Oz laughed.

"What a pussy. Pick me up at four-thirty, alright?"

"Yeah. Me, Kevin and Finch will swing around with the truck then."

Both got in and drove in separate directions, Stifler heading to his house and Oz driving to Kevin's, where they promptly loaded up the pickup with all their supplies and drove to get Finch. They picked the boy up with the regular greetings and headed to Stifler's.

As they were driving, Oz turned to Kevin.

"So, who's the lucky fifth person to make up for Jim not being there?"

Kevin gave him a weird look and shook his head. "Dude, that was your job. You said you knew a guy who'd wanna come along."

"Yeah, I said that. But we never asked him!"

"Oh shit." Kevin moaned and held his forehead. "We need a fifth income if we wanna be able to pay for it! What are we gonna do? Do you know anyone we can ask this late?"

Oz braked to a halt in front of Stifler's and honked the horn. "We can always work double-shifts somewhere…but we'd have no time to party,' he commented disdainfully.

Stifler came out of the house with a few bags and threw them into the back. He pulled himself into the bed and gave Finch the evil eye.

"Why the fuck we gotta bring this asshole?" he demanded.

"Because we need his money and because he deserves to be here as much as you do. And speaking of money, do you know anyone who we could ask to come with us? We need someone to make up for Jim," Oz asked.

As Stifler was shaking his head, they heard a scuffle from the main house and suddenly the front door was kicked open. The boys all turned to catch sight of a late-teenaged girl with long dirty-blonde hair pulled back into a messy ponytail, dressed in a rumpled black tank top and jeans. Her green eyes were blazing and her hands gripped an ugly brown bag, which she flung in a perfect arc across the lawn. The bag fell in a heap not two feet from the truck and she put her hands on her hips and snarled.

"You forgot some of your personals, dumbass. And the next time you look for lingerie to practice with, I'd thank you to not go through my underwear drawer, you fucking pervert!"

All mouths but Stifler's dropped open. "Stif, who's that?" Kevin asked cautiously.

He sneered. "My sister."

"Half-sister, you piece of shit. Don't even let them think I'm completely blood-related to you!" she called across the yard.

"Half-sister?" Oz asked of the blonde in the back.

Stifler shrugged, disgustedly. "My mom let the bitch move in with us during the school year. Her dad is moving to Europe and she doesn't wanna go." To Finch, who Stifler could see was about to inquire about his mother, he flipped the bird. "Eat shit, Shitbreak."

Kevin grinned. "She doesn't happen to have plans for this summer, does she?"

Not thinking, Stifler folded his arms and rolled his eyes. "Not if you don't count sitting around or whoring herself around town. Larissa is a closet lesbian; I just know it"

When he saw the looks in the guys' eyes, he shook his head. "Oh no. You aren't even gonna think of asking-…"

"Hey Larissa! You wanna come stay at the lake this summer?" Kevin called out the rolled-down window.

She eyed them suspiciously. "I'm not gonna have to sleep anywhere near that dickhead, am I?" she demanded.

Oz laughed and shook his head. "Nah, you get your own room."

She smirked and turned on her heels. "Give me five minutes to pack. So long as no one goes through my underwear, I'm game."