Reasonable Doubt
By Dana Keylits
"Castle, you can't be here."
She was holding her apartment door open, but not enough that he could come through it. She had just spent the last two hours crying and didn't want him anywhere near her. It was true that he was the prime suspect in an ongoing murder investigation, but that wasn't the only reason she didn't want to see him. He had lied to her, betrayed her, and she wasn't ready to go anywhere near that subject right now.
"Kate, please. Let me explain."
"I can't have you here, Castle. You know that."
"You're not even on the case, Kate. Isn't that why Captain Gates interrogated me? Instead of you? Because she took you off the case?"
Kate looked startled. "I took myself off the case, Castle."
He paused, digesting her words and their meaning.
"Because you can't be objective? Because you know I didn't do it? Or because you think I did?"
She didn't answer.
"Kate."
"You should go home, Rick." She started to close the door as the tears that she'd been holding at bay threatened to spill over.
He stuck his foot in the door and reached in with his hands to touch her face, "Kate."
She looked horrified, and stepped back, which gave him the opening he needed to enter the apartment. She shook her head, tears spilling down her cheeks as she continued to back into the apartment. "Don't. Don't touch me."
"Kate, please. Please just let me explain. I didn't kill that woman. You know that. You have to know that."
She continued to just stare at him as she stood by the kitchen counter, her face screwed up in a mask of pain and betrayal. "Castle. I told you, I can't talk to you about this. Anything you say to me, anything you say, I have to tell Gates. We can use it against you, don't you see?"
Castle took a calming breath. "Do you think I killed her?"
Kate shifted her weight from one foot to the other and looked at the floor.
"Kate!"
She flinched.
"Do. You. Think. I. Killed. Her?!"
She folded her arms in front of her and looked him in the eye. "No."
Castle exhaled, not even realizing he'd been holding his breath.
"No, Castle. I know you didn't kill her," Kate replied, angrily wiping her cheeks with the fists of both hands.
Relief swept over him. "Then, why..."
"But you slept with her, didn't you?" Kate accused.
Castle paused. "What?"
"Recently, it seems. At least that's what the evidence seems to suggest. That the two of you were having an affair?"
"Kate. Wait a minute, okay?"
"Answer the question, Castle."
Now it was his turn to be silent. He shoved his hands in his front pockets and looked past her, trying to decide how to handle this.
"Rick! Did you have sex with her? Yes or no? It's a simple question."
Almost inaudibly he answered, "Yes."
She recoiled. He may as well have just wound up and punched her in the stomach, it would have hurt less. Her mouth dropped open, tears spilled down her cheeks and she grabbed at the counter to steady herself. Everything went out of focus and the only sensory awareness she had was hearing the echo of his admission. Yes. Yes, he'd slept with the victim. Yes, he was having an affair. Yes, he'd betrayed her. Yes, he hadn't changed at all. Yes, every fear she'd had about being with him had just been confirmed.
Yes, she was an idiot.
She looked up at him, narrowed her eyes and asked, "When did it start?"
"Look, Kate. It doesn't matter. Yes, I slept with her, I had a brief fling with her, but as soon as you and I got together, it ended."
"Wait, what?"
He sighed and stepped closer to her. She held up a palm. "Don't."
"Kate. I was with her for a few weeks last Spring. I was still licking my wounds after finding out that you'd been lying to me about, you know, that you'd remembered your shooting. That you remembered me telling you that I loved you." He paused, running his fingers through his hair, trying to read her stony expression. "And, all that time, you never said anything to me. I was hurt. I lashed out. I thought you didn't want to be with me and I was trying to move on."
"So, when did it end?" Kate asked, her eyes still narrowed.
"As soon as you and I got together."
Kate's eyes widened. "Wait, so that..." Her lips parted in disbelief, she looked frantically around before landing her eyes back on Castle. "So, that makes me the other woman! You were in a relationship with her when you slept with me?"
"Kate..."
"Oh my God, Castle. I had sex with you in your bed, the very bed you probably had sex with her in the night before?"
"No. Kate, God, will you stop? Give me a chance to explain!" He stepped towards her, and before she could stop him, had placed both of his hands on her arms. She shrugged him off and walked into the living room, her arms folded tightly across her middle.
She turned to look at him. "Fine. Explain."
He steeled himself. "We were not in an exclusive relationship," He hurried to clarify, "She and I, not you and I. In fact, I'm pretty sure she was dating two other men at the same time she was seeing me. You might want to look at one, or both, of those guys," He suggested, pointing at the black notebook that was resting on the coffee table. When she didn't reply, or make a move to take notes, he forged on. "Remember the zombie case? Remember what you said to me after we collared that little snot?"
She thought back. She'd told him that the wall that she'd built up around her was coming down, that she was almost where she wanted to be, in a place where she could accept everything that had happened the day of her shooting. Including that he had told her he loved her. She told him that she wanted him there when the wall finally tumbled.
She nodded.
"I started to cool things off with her then. That very night. Kate, when you gave me that glimmer of hope. That maybe you did love me? All I could think about was you. I just wanted to be with you."
No fair repeating the very words she'd said to him on that rainy night when she'd shown up unannounced, not sure he'd forgive her, not sure he'd accept her, and in a moment of complete vulnerability, admitted to him that she just wanted him. No fair. She shifted her weight again. "But, you just now said that you didn't end it until after we got together."
"That's true. But, I had already told her I needed a break. That I didn't see our relationship going anywhere. We stopped having sex a week before you and I slept together. And, I finally ended it for good a few days after."
"A few days?"
"We were kind of busy, remember? The whole catching your moms killer thing? Your life in peril? I didn't have time to tell her until after that got resolved."
Kate nodded again. She was starting to regain control of her senses and her arms dropped to her sides. She walked towards Castle, stopping just out of his reach. She still couldn't bear it if he touched her. Her emotions were too raw, she needed time to absorb what he'd told her.
Her brow furrowed, she thought about it."That explains the fingerprints, but it doesn't explain the jewelry. You bought jewelry for her, Castle." She took a steadying breath. "Recently."
"No. We picked up the jewelry recently. But, if you dig deeper, you'll see that we ordered that bracelet months ago. I didn't want to not give it to her, just because I broke up with her. It was a replica of a bracelet that had belonged to her mom. It was important to her and she couldn't afford it on her own, so I still paid for it even though we weren't dating anymore. But, Kate, you have to believe me that I gave it to her as her friend. Not her lover."
Kate mulled that over. It would be easy enough to prove when he'd ordered it. Surely, the jewelry store had that on record. She made a mental note to instruct Esposito to talk to the manager at the jewelry store first thing in the morning. She glanced back up at Castle."Her friend?"
Castle shook his head. "It was the first time I'd seen her since we broke up, Kate. And, I had no intention of ever seeing her again. I'm with you." He stepped closer and was encouraged when she didn't move away, "Only you."
She looked up at him. She felt herself soften with relief. "You're telling me the truth? You haven't been with her since we've been together?"
He shook his head, "I haven't been with anyone but you, Kate."
Unbidden tears welled up again, but this time they was tears of reprieve. He hadn't cheated on her, hadn't betrayed her, and although she only had his word on it, she was choosing to believe him. It was all she could do. She had to believe him.
She tilted her head towards him and gave him the faintest of smiles. It nearly broke his heart, because, although her lips were curved in a smile, he could see her hurt, the agony she'd been through in the last 24 hours was painfully etched on her face. It killed him that she'd had to go through it. He reached out and tentatively put his arms around her. When she didn't resist, he pulled her closer. She sighed, then sobbed, and then wrapped her arms around him.
They stood there, holding each other for several minutes. Not saying anything. Not moving. Barely breathing. They were just holding on for dear life.
Finally, reluctantly, she pulled away and wiped her cheeks with her fingers. "You'd better go, Rick."
"Kate. I don't want to go."
"I know. And, I don't want you to go, either. But the fact remains that I am a cop and you are a suspect, and until that is resolved, we can't be together."
He sighed. "Then we have to resolve it."
She looked startled. "Castle, you cannot go around investigating this murder. You're in up to your neck, and the best thing you can do is go home, shut up, and listen to your lawyer. Esposito, Ryan, and I will figure out who the real killer is. In the meantime, you have to stay away."
He pulled her close again. "I can't."
This time she melted into him, nestling her head against his chest. Reluctantly she said, "You have to."
He took a deep breath then exhaled slowly. He used both hands to frame her face, drawing her in for a long, slow kiss. She responded, a quiet moan escaping her lips. He slipped his tongue between her lips and savored the sweet taste of her. She felt the familiar stirring in her belly, the heat rising inside of her, begging for release, for satisfaction. She ran her fingers through his hair, pressing her body against his, relishing his warmth, and strength, the familiar curve of her body against his, of his lips against hers, of the vibration of their bodies when they were so close. She explored his mouth with her tongue, and then suddenly, before she lost all sense of reality, let go and pulled away.
"Castle, we can't. You have to go, now. I can't take the chance of Gates finding out you were here. It will only make things worse." She absently wiped her lips with the tips of her fingers.
Castle sighed. "Fine. I'll go. But will you at least keep me informed about what's going on?"
"I will when I can, okay?"
Castle nodded. He leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips, "I love you, Kate. You do know that, don't you?"
She smiled. "Yes. I do. I love you, too." She kissed him. "And, we'll get this figured out. We'll get it figured out as fast as we can."
"Good," He said as he headed to the front door. She followed him. "Because I don't know how long I can wait for us to be together again," He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into him, whispering, "I want to make love to you, Kate."
She nodded, a lump in her throat. "I know, me too."
He searched her eyes, seeing that she wasn't going to change her mind and let him take her to the bedroom, he turned and walked out the door.
She closed it behind him and then crossed to the living room where her phone was resting on the coffee table. She picked it up and punched in Espo's number.
"Javi, we have to find out who really killed our vic, and why Castle is being framed for it." She stared out the window and saw Castle hurrying across the street to get into a cab. He looked up and saw her staring at him. He raised his arm to wave at her, then, uncharacteristically but apropos of the moment, blew her a kiss. Involuntarily, she returned the gesture.
She turned away and picked up her jacket and keys and then headed to the door, "In fact, we're going to pull an all-nighter. Call Ryan and tell him to meet us at the precinct. I want this resolved tonight."
She was back on the case. And, she was going to find the killer. And when she did, and Castle was cleared, she was going to go straight to his apartment - and fuck his brains out.
The End.