At the End of Things
Eva Yasha
A/N: I couldn't decide which Saiyuki pairing I liked the best, because I feel like there is a bond between the whole group that just shouldn't be broken into pairings, so I decided to do something about it. Here it is, I hope you like it.
â.. is thoughts, just so you know.
Cho Hakkai shivered slightly and stopped sweeping long enough to glance up at the sky. It was a clear, cold blue, showing only a few wisps of cloud in the distance. Thin sunlight poured down across the yard. It was a typical day in early spring, though a bit on the cool side. Hakkai blinked sleepily as a sudden gust of wind sent a cascade of fallen cherry blossoms swirling through his field of vision. He sighed heavily, and looked down at a pile of those same blossoms gathered at his feet, then glanced back down along the walkway behind him; a walkway that had been free of pale pink petals just moments ago. He huffed irritably, he'd have to go back and sweep it again.
It was that time of year again, of balmy days and falling blossoms. Hakkai used to enjoy this time of the year. Not so anymore. He gritted his teeth against the sudden onslaught of memories, sweeping furiously.
Flashback Four Years
The journey into the West finally complete, the members of the Sanzo-ikkou had settled in this remote village in hopes of finding a peaceful life. They lived happily, simply. Hakkai taught at the village school that was nearby during the day, Gojyo drank and gambled at night, Sanzo smoked incessantly and Goku ate them out of house and home. Hakkai had been truly happy, for the first time in many years.
Then, one day in early spring, it all fell apart. Sanzo, who had been growing ever more mysterious, abruptly left the house, vanishing in a swirl of cherry blossoms, never to be heard from again. Without Sanzo, Goku began to lose his appetite, lose sleep, and wilt away. One day he, too, vanished. Hakkai and Gojyo were deeply hurt, but understood the boy's compulsive need to follow "his sun".
So then it was just Hakkai and Gojyo again, just as it had been in the beginning. They had lived that way for another year, making their way through the days trying to ignore the feeling that gaping pieces of their souls were missing.
Until the Sakura bloomed again. Shortly after the appearance of the first blossoms, Gojyo had left in the night. Hakkai woke up the next morning, and he was gone without a trace. There was only an empty bed, littered with the cherry blossoms that floated in through the open window, and a slip of paper that said simply "Wait."
Hakkai came back to himself with a start as the sky abruptly darkened. He looked around in bewilderment as he realized just how much time had passed while he was lost in his memories. A storm was brewing above him, and the first scattered drops of rain were beginning to fall. Cold wind swept down the walkway, flinging cherry blossoms into the air. Spontaneously, Hakkai reached out and snatched a handful of the petals from the air in front of him. He held them before his face, marveling at their perfect velvet softness. Biting his lip against the painful emotions they called forth in him, he brought the petals to his lips, inhaling their subtle scent.
Gojyo.... he thought suddenly, so strongly he could almost hear the hanyou's voice, and smell his scent, like water and sunlight.
Sanzo.....Goku...... Golden eyes, and purple, the crack of a gunshot......
Come back to me.
Unthinkingly, he tossed the handful of petals into the air, watching mesmerized as the wind carried them away into the darkening sky.
Sha Gojyo bolted awake as thunder crashed outside his window. He sat up and looked out the window by the bed, cursing inwardly. It was going to rain again. Gojyo hated the rain. The rain always made him think of the people he most wanted to forget. With a sigh, he cracked the window open, hoping somehow that the fresh air would help clear his mind.
He'd spent the better part of two years in a drunken haze, trying to forget, trying to escape the pain. It was a gnawing ache deep in his soul that he couldn't bring himself to acknowledge. And the dreams...the dreams were the worst. He remembered them only in brief flashes, the pale curve of a delicate hip, the graceful swoop of skin beneath the rib cage, silhouetted in moonlight, firm tan flesh beneath his fingers....but it was the eyes that haunted him. Sorrowful eyes that he could never afterwards remember the color of, only that they may have been purple, or gold, or green.
A particularly cold gust of wind broke him from his thoughts. He passed a hand over his eyes tiredly. Two years, wasted. He'd left Hakkai in their tiny house, hoping to find Sanzo and Goku and bring them back. He'd had no luck, it was as thought they'd vanished from the face of the earth. After six months, Gojyo began to despair, and without Hakkai.....Hakkai to support him and back him up, Hakkai to bolster his failing spirits, Hakkai to ease his aching soul....Gojyo had fallen to drinking. He traveled constantly in an ever tightening spiral around the village where he knew Hakkai was still living, still waiting. Only his stubborn pride had kept him from returning. He didn't want Hakkai to see him like that....truly a drunken sot.
He was better now, and only a few days north of the place he still thought of as home, yet he lingered on in this city, hesitant. He was afraid that after all this time Hakkai wouldn't want him around anymore... He shook his head dismissively and lay back down. It was no use thinking like that.
The rain poured down, lulling him back to sleep.
Gojyo woke the next morning to tepid sunlight falling through the open window. He sat up, rubbing his eyes to clear them of sleep. He reached down to pull away the blankets, and paused, his eyes wide. Cherry petals were scatted across the bed, apparently blown in by the storm.
"But they haven't bloomed yet...." Gojyo murmured to himself.
He looked out the window again. Yup, no blossoms. He got out of bed, still clutching the handful of petals.
"They aren't blooming here yet, but in the south......" he mumbled "Just a few days south....."
He stopped pacing abruptly. "South....."
The answer came to him in a flash. Gojyo smiled, his eyes lightening.
"Alright, Hakkai." he said aloud. "I'm coming home."
Genjo Sanzo twitched, but didn't open his eyes, when he felt a soft brush against his cheek. Then it happened again, and again. He sighed in irritation and opened his eyes, fully prepared to shoot whatever was interrupting his meditation. His eyes widened, and he stifled a gasp. Cherry blossoms were raining down on him from an empty sky. He reached out and let them fall into his cupped palm. As suddenly as they had come, they stopped. Sanzo was left contemplating a palm full of pale pink petals with no hint as to where they came from.
"Oi." he said quietly.
"Sanzo?" Son Goku peered around the edge of the small outdoor shrine where they were resting for the afternoon.
"What do you make of this?" Sanzo asked, holding out the petals.
Goku slowly unfolded his long legs and walked over to Sanzo to get a better look.
"Sakura?" he mumbled, inspecting the petals carefully. "It doesn't grow here."
Sanzo gritted he teeth. "I know that, baka-saru. Yet here it is."
Goku grinned cheerfully, bending down to smell the blossoms sweet scent.
"Ahhh...It's been so long since I smelled....." he trailed off, his smile fading to be replaced by a look of extreme puzzlement. "Hakkai?"
"What?" Sanzo yelped, drawing back.
"No, wait....." Goku grabbed Sanzo's wrist, trapping the hand that held the petals and burying his face in Sanzo's palm. "Yesâits there....faint, but I know that scent anywhere."
"Very well." Sanzo pronounced, standing up and dusting off his robes. "Let's go."
"Eh?" Goku looked up at him in bewilderment. "Go where? I thought....."
"You thought wrong. I'm sick of doing this anyway......"
Goku grinned, comprehension dawning in his eyes. "You mean....."
Sanzo looked down at him, the ghost of a smile dancing around his lips.
"Its time to go home."
Hakkai sneezed violently and paused to rub his nose irritably. He was out on the walk; again, sweeping away the cherry blossoms that had fallen during the night. It had become something of a ritual for him, clearing them away every morning. He abruptly sneezed again, blinking rapidly as his vision blurred in and out. He cursed silently.
Great" he thought Now I'm coming down with somethingâ.
Really, he hadn't felt well for daysâ.
I'll finish sweeping, then go lie down.
Quickly, he swept his way to the end of the walk, but when he turned back to the house, he found that more and more blossoms had fallen onto the path. Sighing tiredly, he started to sweep again.
Gojyo walked slowly down the twisting path to the small house that held so many memories for him with nervousness growing heavier in the pit of his stomach.
He rounded a corner, and felt his breath catch in his throat. Hakkai stood in the yard, barefoot amongst the falling cherry blossoms, with a look of infinite sadness gracing his beautiful face. He was breathtaking, and Gojyo stood transfixed, memorizing the beauty before him, imprinting it on his heart.
Hakkai looked away, and the spell holding Gojyo was broken. He stepped forward just as Hakkai turned away, back toward the house. He took one more step after his friend, opening his mouth to speakâââââ.
Hakkai turned back toward the house, breathing heavily as his stomach churned.
Definitely coming down with somethingâ. the words floated across his mind with a curious sort of detachment.
He took a step, and swayed violently, the broom slipping from his suddenly nerveless fingers. His vision began to fade, and he felt himself fall, some remote part of his brain still working enough to brace him for the impact.
It never came. Hakkai opened his eyes slowly.
Red
It filled his vision. Red hair. Red eyes. There was only one color of red that looked like that. Only one.
"Gojyo....."