Offers Come In
Cut to an office where Kim is seen surrounded by marketing agents.
"THE MEEK SHALL INHERIT"
Agents (singing): Kim Possible, so finally we meet you!
This is an occasion, let's toast it! Up yours!
Just relax! Canapé? Cigarette?
Let's talk turkey. Sign here and we'll book
You on lecturing tours!
Cut to Bueno Nacho where Kim sits in a booth with an aging but glamorous blonde lady from Life Magazine and her creepy, male assistant. They are finishing a very lavish lunch.
Blonde Lady (singing): Yes, darling, we're sending photographs Thursday.
So get the plant ready and wear a clean shirt.
Just sign this release.
She produces a contract.
Assistant (singing): Need a pen?
Blonde Lady (singing): Aren't you thrilled? It's the cover of Life Magazine.
As if to bribe her, the assistant pushes an enormous serving of nachos covered in melted cheese and tomato sauce in front of Kim.
Cut to an office of a television station. On the wall is a logo with the title "Kim Possible's Gardening Tips". A TV Executive, writer and flunky are sitting with Kim.
Executive (singing): I'm telling you honey, it's a cinch to get ratings.
The title is Marvin's.
Writer (singing): The concept is mine.
Flunky (singing): An all-new weekly gardening show on our network.
Executive (singing): And you're gonna host it, you lucky girl.
All (singing): SIGN!
Kim runs out of the room trying to get away from all the greediness surrounding her. She hears the voices of the girls singing in her mind.
Girls (singing voiceover): They say the meek shall inherit.
You know the book doesn't lie.
It's not a question of merit.
It's not demand or supply.
They say the meek gonna get it.
Yori (singing): And you're a meek little girl!
Girls (singing voiceover): You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to
'em by and by…
As she continues running, she finds herself surrounded by total darkness. She continues running but now in slow motion.
Kim (singing): My future's starting.
I've got to let it.
Stick with that plant
And gee, my bank account will thrive.
What am I saying?
No way! Forget it!
It's much too dangerous
To keep that plant alive!
Just then, part of the wall lights up. Kim is horrified to see the wall entirely covered in contracts.
Kim (singing): I take these offers,
That means more killing.
Who knew success would come with messy, nasty strings?
I sign these contracts,
That means I'm willing
To keep on doing bloody, awful, evil things.
Suddenly, as if possessed, Kim starts ripping the contracts off the wall.
Kim (singing): No! No!
There's only so far you can bend!
No! No!
This nightmare must come to an end!
Close-up of Kim's face as she violently sits up from her bed in the shop…perspiration dripping from her.
Kim (singing): No! No!
Kim gets out of bed; picks up the axe and starts walking up the stairs as she sings.
Kim (singing): You've got no alternative, Kimmy old girl.
Though it means you'll be broke again without as much as a pearl.
It's the only solution
It can't be avoided –
The vegetable must be destroyed!
She reaches the top of the stairs and flings open the door. But her anger quickly fades when she pictures Ron standing in front of the plant. She drops the axe in shock.
Kim (singing): But then there's Ron,
Lovely, Ron.
If life would go back
To the way it was before.
He might not like me.
He might not want me.
Without my plant,
He might not love me, anymore.
The agents, the lady from Life Magazine and her assistant, and the people from the TV station all emerge from the shadows with their contracts.
Knowing she can't escape it, Kim slowly approaches them defeated.
Girls (singing voiceover): They say the meek shall inherit…
Kim (singing): Where do I sign?
They start handing her contracts and pens. Kim starts signing.
Girls (singing voiceover): You know the book doesn't lie.
Agent (singing): Right on the line.
Girls (singing voiceover): It's not a question of merit.
Blonde Lady (singing): Your pen or mine?
Girls (singing voiceover): It's not demand or supply.
Flunky (singing): Paragraph nine.
Girls (singing voiceover): You'll make a fortune, we swear it.
TV Executive (singing): Couldn't got wrong
Girls (singing voiceover): If on this fact you rely!
With their contracts signed, they all run away in excitement.
All (singing): Bye-Bye. So long!
Kim turns to look at the plant and imagines it advancing on her. She backs away until she hits the wall.
Girls (singing voiceover): You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to
'em …
You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to
'em …
You know the meek are gonna get what's comin' to
'em …
By…and…by…
Kim starts screaming as we fade to black.
The streets are deserted now and the sun is setting. Kim is sitting on the sidewalk outside thinking about the current situation and how she is powerless to stop it.
Kim: What am I going to do? What am I going to do? If I don't feed it, it'll die.
But if I keep feeding it, it'll just be more blood on my hands!
She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a picture of her and Ron and looks at it.
Kim: Oh Ron, sometimes I wish I never bought that stupid plant.
She puts the picture back in her pocket, stands up and walks into the shop. After closing the door, she notices the plant is now wilted and lifeless. Kim stands looking at it in silence for a moment then very quietly tries to sneak past it. But before she gets to the basement door, a spooky hoarse whisper stops her dead in her tracks.
Audrey II: Feed me.
Kim: Under no circumstances.
Audrey II: Feed me.
Kim: I will not so stop asking.
Audrey II: Feed me!
Kim: No. no more. I can't take living with the guilt.
Audrey II: Tough titty!
Kim: Watch your language!
The plant quickly becomes livelier.
Audrey II: Awwh. Cut the crap and bring on the meat!
Kim (walking to the front door): Okay…okay… I'll run down to the butcher and I'll pick you up some nice ground round, how about that?
Audrey II: Don't do me no favors.
Kim: Look, it's my final offer. Yes or no?
Audrey II (beat): You sure do drive a hard bargain.
Kim (opening the door): Done. Fine. Great. And don't think you're getting desert!
She closes the door and walks down the street towards the butcher. The plant watches her leave and laughs quietly to itself. After waiting a beat, it slithers one of its vines toward the table.
The vine crawls up the side of the table and lifts the receiver. It is brought up to the pod where, if the pod had an ear, its ear would be. The vine dials a number and then taps on the window patiently waiting for the phone to be answered.
Mrs. Possible is seen across the street looking at a shop's window display when she hears her mobile ring. She takes it out of her coat pocket and answers it.
Audrey II is heard filtered through the mobile. The plant breathes heavily and obscenely, then…
"SUPPERTIME II"
Audrey II (singing): Hey, little lady, hello!
Mrs. Possible: Who… who is this?
Audrey II (singing): You're looking cute as can be.
Mrs. Possible (thinking this is a joke): Is this someone I know?
Audrey II (singing): You're lookin' mighty sweet!
Mrs. Possible (smiling affectionately): Is that you, honey?
Audrey II (singing): No, it ain't your husband…
Mrs. Possible turns around and sees the Audrey II. It is the last blaze of sunset. Across the street, through the shop's window, she sees the plant… totally alive now. Its vines writhing like a Medusa, its leaves flapping like great palmetto fans, its pod grown to mammoth proportions. It emits an unearthly green glow that spills from the shop onto the street.
Mrs. Possible (voiceover): Oh my God!
She starts running across the street as the vine replaced the receiver.
Mrs. Possible has just opened the front door and she stands and stares in amazement.
Mrs. Possible: I don't believe it.
Audrey II: Believe it, baby, it talks.
Mrs. Possible: Am I dreaming this?
Audrey II: No, and you ain't in Kansas, neither.
Audrey II reaches out with one vine and pushes the door shut. Another vine creeps towards Ms. Possible; she pushes it away and steps away.
Mrs. Possible: Something's very wrong here.
Ms. Possible keeps walking ending up in the center of the room. Vines continue to snake around her, threatening to enfold her.
Audrey II (beat): I need me some water in the worst way.
Look at my branches; I'm drying up. I'm a goner, honey.
(Singing) Come on and give me a drink!
Mrs. Possible: I don't know if I should.
Audrey II (singing): Hey, little lady, be nice.
Two more vines hoist the skirt of her robes. She pushes them away as yet another snakes over her shoulders.
Mrs. Possible: Do you talk to Kim like this?
Audrey II (singing): Sure do!
I'll drink it straight!
Ms. Possible grabs the vine from her shoulder with both hands. Still another creeps up behind her.
Audrey II (singing): Don't need no glass or no ice!
Three vines snake around Ms. Possible's waist. She pushes them back down and turns towards the table.
Ms. Possible: I'll get the can.
Audrey II (singing): Don't need no twist of lime!
She reaches over the table and grabs the water can from underneath.
Ms. Possible: Here we go.
Audrey II (singing): AND NOW IT'S SUPPERTIME!
To Ms. Possible's horror, the plant wraps its vines around her arms, wrists, and waist. She drops the can. Laughing, the plant begins dragging the screaming, struggling Ms. Possible towards its laughing maw.
Audrey II: Relax, doll and it'll be easier.
Come join your daughter's friends Brick and Bonnie…
She screams.
Audrey II: They're right inside!
The plant laughs as it draws her inexorably closer, closer…
And with one great heave, the vines pull her into the pod itself. The jaws clamp down. She screams again.
The shop door flies open. Kim and Ron rush in and begin prying at the pod with all their might.
Kim: Get off of her! Get off of her!
They finally succeed in getting the pod open just enough to pull her out. She is alive, but just barely. Her clothes are tastefully stained with just a bit of red.
They carry her out of the shop until they get her beyond the plant's reach and through the door. The two then carry her across the street and lay her against a wall.
Kim: Are you alright, mom?
Mrs. Possible: Yes… (She clutches her stomach in pain) no!
Kim: Mom! Mom!
Mrs. Possible: You know, the plant said the strangest thing just now. It said Brick and Bonnie are already inside.
Kim lowers her head.
Kim: It's true. I did it. I fed them to it.
Ron: KP, how could you?
Mrs. Possible (touching Kim's cheek): And that's what made it so big and strong and you so famous.
Kim: I've done terrible things, Mom. But not to you. Never to you.
She taker her hand from Kim's cheek and looks away.
Mrs. Possible: But I want you to, Kim.
Kim: What?
Mrs. Possible: When I die, which should be very shortly, give me to the plant, so that it will live and bring you all the wonderful things you deserve.
Both Kim and Ron are horrified.
Kim: You don't know what you're saying.
Mrs. Possible: But I do. It's the one gift I can give you. (She smiles) and if I'm in the plant, then I'm part of the plant. So in a way, we'll always be together.
She reaches out toward her imaginary paradise. Then she shudders and goes limp. Kim holds her tightly, racked with guilt and grief. Slowly the door opens onto the waiting Audrey II. Both Kim and Ron carry Mrs. Possible across the street and through the door to her final resting-place. The plant slowly brings it head down at their level and opens its mouth as they approach.
They watch as the plant simultaneously closes its mouth and raises its head, easing her body down its throat. Soon, all that is visible of her is her hand, sticking out from between the plant's teeth. Kim reaches out to her hand, but cannot bring herself to touch it. Soon, her hand disappears inside too, and the plant closes its mouth in a triumphant grin.
Kim closes her eyes and lowers her head. When she raises it again, her face is a mask of despair.
The two run outside and across the street where Kim collapses to her knees in tears.
A few minutes later, a voice is heard.
Patrick: Miss Possible?
A first, she does not hear.
Patrick (more insistently): Miss Possible?
At last, Kim stands up and sees Patrick Martin, a licensing agent standing there. His hands are behind his back.
