Date Written: 5/20/15
Summary: One day, Tamaki discovers the American scientist Bill Nye and his many, many videos. Not to be taken seriously.
Disclaimer: I do not own OHSCH or Bill Nye. Kind of wish I did though.
Tamaki strolled into the club room, a big goofy smile on his face. In his hands was Kyoya's laptop, open to a tab on Google. A man in his late 50's decorated the page, full of his awkward smiles.
"Look what your gracious king found!" Tamaki announced.
The twins glanced at each other. "I doubt it's anything great, Tono. We'll pass."
Tamaki gasped. He had never been so offended in his entire life. His mysterious late night binge Googling find had never paid off before, until that very day, and he had always wanted to show his club something new. Something even Haruhi wouldn't know about, since she was a commoner after all. And commoners always know other commoner things.
"No, I demand you! You must see this wonderful American man." He commanded. "I mean. . .I don't exactly know what he's saying, but it just looks like something commoners watch. Haruhi! Get over here!"
The petite girl looked up from her tea, uninterested. She pondered what would happen if she ignored him, and then deemed it not worth it, seeing as he would just grope her to get her attention. She sighed, left her tea, and stood behind him.
"Senpai, who's he?" She questioned, tilting her head.
"Apparently, his name is Bill Nye. He's a scientist that makes videos to help children in American schools. He's a hero! Watch this."
He pressed a video and music started from the speakers in the laptop. Confusion replaced questioning, while the echoing of "Bill Bill Bill" filled the room. It looked old and the quality poor, but the hosts seemed to enjoy it.
"Senpai. . . I don't understand. . ." Haruhi mumbled.
Tamaki spread his arms out. "Don't you see, Haruhi? He's teaching us about science! He knows everything about it! He's made so many of these videos. We should watch them all!"
And so, the Ouran Highschool Host Club watched almost every single video of Bill Nye's over the course of the week in between hosting. The tired eyes of the hosts were pitted around the school and sad glances were given. All, except Tamaki, were to the point of murder because of the countless episodes of one man's face and an annoying theme song played on repeat.
The hosts gathered together in an empty classroom before club time started, holding a "what are we going to do about Tamaki" meeting. Kyoya was considering murdering him, but decided against the idea, as it would hurt future business deals. The twins were complaining about how they couldn't get, "Bill Bill Bill" out of their heads. Haruhi kept complaining about stupid rich people. The two third years were chilling in a corner, drinking tea and eating cake.
"What are we going to do about Tono?" Hikaru questioned, wanting to propose a "throw him out a window" scheme.
"I say we leave the club," Haruhi suggested.
Kyoya glanced up from his laptop. "Your debt says otherwise."
She glared at him, hating rich people a little more each second.
"Maybe he should move in with you, Kyoya-senpai."
"Haruhi, don't forget I control your debt." Kyoya counterparted.
She gave up, throwing herself in a chair, officially giving up. Her own personal sign of defeat.
Honey spoke up, his voice chiper through the depressed aura. "I don't know guys, I think the videos are kinda cute, don't you think? Why don't we just watch them for Tamaki, ~kay?"
All of the hosts, except for Mori, automatically said, "No."
"Well, fine. At least this cake likes my idea." He pouted, staring at the cake.
"Oh, I know!" The twins said, grinning to each other.
The next day, the hosts got ready for the day as usual. That day, the club was closed so that a meeting could be conducted for the next week's cosplay idea. The background music was managed by Tamaki, so the hosts were so very lucky to hear Bill Nye's theme song on repeat. It was such a happy day for all of them, but if the plan worked, they would never have to hear his voice again.
Hikaru and Kaoru sat first, trying not to grin. Haruhi sighed, placing herself at the table as well. The rest followed suit. It felt normal enough to Tamaki, and so, he began.
"For next week's cosplay idea, I think-"
The twins jumped up, suddenly shouting, "BILL BILL BILL."
They tackled him to the ground, chanting, with the rest of the club following. They splashed Tamaki with water, threw cake on him.
Shoving some cake in his mouth, they chorused, "BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY" and then got back up, sat at the table, and started talking about the plans for next week. They failed to notice the whimpering Tamaki in the background, traumatized.
To say the least, they never did hear about Bill Nye the Science Guy ever again.