MAGGIE'S DOGS
Chris knew this day would come. When he heard moaning coming from upstairs, he knew his son had his girlfriend over for a good time. He already planned it out, how he'd storm upstairs and catch them in the act. He put the plan into action...
...but the noises were coming from his daughter, Maggie's, room. He threw open the door and saw a scene he hadn't witnessed since his childhood. A large pack of hotdogs were open on the bed, and Maggie had several sticking out of her vagina, a buzzing vibrator hanging out as her hand hovered over the sheets.
"Shit, Maggie!" Chris exclaimed. "Who the fuck taught you that?!"
"A video online. There's nothing wrong with this," Maggie said calmly, as if this were perfectly normal. She watched her father check out the video pulled up on her desktop near the door.
"Ugh! That's my sister! She told me she had a new job but I didn't think she meant this!" Chris spat, turning off the monitor, "You do that in your own house when you move out! And where did you get that vibrator?!"
"Aunt Meg," Maggie smiled as she casually sat it on her nightstand and replaced the hotdogs into the family pack. She continued, "She said that we're all sexual beings, but it's better when you don't involve anyone else so you don't get sick and you don't get pregnant. Kind of like you and Mom with Brock," Maggie said with a raised eyebrow as she put the hotdogs back into the minifridge beside her bed.
"I guess you're right, but we don't need this to happen again, ever. You need to listen for the cars or the door, something to tell you we're home. You figure it out, but you can only be that sexual in your own house."
"Fair. I'll remember that, but you need to get out," Maggie said, pointing to the door. Chris obeyed, and he never went into his daughter's room ever again.
-End