Title: Do What You Want with Me
Anime: Ouran High School Host Club
Pairing: HikaKao
Chapter 1
It were as though Hikaru didn't understand him at all. Kaoru didn't get it. How was it that his big brother couldn't see what was bothering him? Hikaru didn't even seem to ask him about his problems, anymore.
"Hey…" a voice asked him softly in the third music room. "What's wrong?" she asked him. He smiled a little bit, sadly, yet partially amused.
"Yeah, I figured that you of all people could tell, Haruhi. I'm probably most upset by the fact that Hikaru can't tell, though, and I've known him always…"
"It might help if you told him." She suggested.
"You'd think that, but it's not that simple." He frowned. "I'm doing more than dropping hints to him. Shouldn't the look on my face say it? Shouldn't my eyes say all the words that I need to convey?" he looked at her, hoping for some sort of special kind of wisdom to come from her lips.
"Sometimes, if you can't put it into words when trying to say something, a picture or just plain writing it down helps. Let him know exactly what's on your mind. Also, when something's wrong, it's not the best idea to deny it. You deny it when he asks, right?"
"I used to. Now, he doesn't ask, so I have nothing to deny. I feel like he's away from me even though we're always together…" he paused, trying to think of what to say. "I'm not an artist, and what I want him to understand would be strange and awkward to draw. I don't think he'd be able to tell since I draw so badly. As for writing it… I'll have to think about this very seriously before I write anything down. Like, you know how when things come out better in your head than out loud or on paper?"
"Yeah?"
"It's like that."
"Ah… well, I can't really help you, there. I guess I'll just wish you good luck, and hope for the best." She walked to another part of the room.
-
That evening, Kaoru sat at his desk at home, trying to write something down.
"It's… really hard…" he said. He eventually let his head drop so that his forehead smacked the desk. "And freakin' retarded… why can't he just tell? I mean… I'm dropping some pretty big hints. How can he be so blind?" Hikaru walked in.
"Hey, I'm gonna get a shower." He said, leaving for the bathroom. Kaoru groaned in reply.
"This is stupid…" he grumbled. "But I have about twenty minutes to think about it before he gets out. Yeah. Ha. No pressure…" he took his pencil and started to write whatever came to his mind.
I'm so sensitive I looked you in the eyes and try to seduce you
My body is so sensitive
I drop hints and lines
But you don't seem to notice
The way I tremble under your touch in the Host Club
The way I try to ignore those dumb girls and focus on how I'm not supposed to kiss you
How ever single fiber of my being feels like it's on fire
How your eyes undress me, but you probably don't know you're doing it
Do what you want with me
Do what you want with my body
Take it all the way
And go even further, if you like
Make me scream
Hurt me if you want
I just wantsomething
My own eyes are undressing you
I don't see how you don't notice
The fact that I'm always aroused when I'm near you
As of late, I cannot appreciate
The fact that you don't notice me at all
It's like you're not here even when you're with me
And as of a week ago
You don't even ask me what's wrong
He had more to add to it. How far was Kaoru willing to go to get his point across?
I want to be dominated by you
I want you to catch me pleasuring myself in the most embarrassing way
And stop me before I reach sweet bliss
And then tell me, 'Let me take care of that, for you'
And then I'll spread myself open wide
And scream in ecstasy as you do what you want to my aching, needy body
I'm so sensitive and tender
I feel like you're the cord and I'm the plug
And we could make friction until sparks start flying like electricity
What more could he write to entice him?
I'm not innocent
Not in my heart
I'm a bad kid
I want you so badly
I want to go wild and forget idiotic restraints in life
Forget those retarded rules that make my life Hell
That incest is wrong
And brothers shouldn't fall in love with each other
But I want your hands on my soft, sensitive flesh
I want you to go beyond all the barriers and take me down
I want to scream
I want to know that it's really happening
Even if it hurts and the pleasure never comes to me
And you justuseme
I want it no matter what
He heard the shower turn off. Hikaru would be out in a moment.
I hear you
You're going to come out looking for clothes and be dripping wet
Looking gorgeous
He heard him walking in.
And now I've completely lost my nerve.
He crumbled the paper and threw it away. It was the only paper in the wastebasket.
"So, what'd you do while I was washing up?"
'Writing about all that you're aloud to do to my body.' He thought.
"Nothing, really. It wasn't all that special, anyway." He said.
'But it already feels like I've gotten it partially off of my chest…'