The Great Gangu

On a planet far off in the galaxy known as Bomber, there lived a small robot named Gangu.

Gangu had short limbs and tiny arms, but the big hands made up for that. He was sky blue and had some purple lines on his body. His eyes were small, black and perfectly rounded as if you were looking at real circles. He also had two small light bulbs sticking out of his head that passed off as ears.

This robot was a member of the famous Bomberman Jetters, an elite fighting group sworn to protect unique items from the Higehige Dan. Sadly, that didn't mean he could really fight or anything.

No, Gangu was never designed to fight. Often times, his best friend, a giant Achelosaurus named Bongo would often try to reassemble him into a whole series of wacky household appliances. Gangu could have possibly been the laser, but he wasn't.

Nope, Gangu was more along the lines of the toaster, the coffee grinder, the cheese grater, the alarm clock and the disco ball. Wait, there's more! He was also the tea cozy, the mini stove, the trashcan, the washing machine for socks, the pocket knife…

Gangu had many uses, but sadly, he had only been used a few times for battle, like when Bongo turned his hands into sludge cannons so the Jetters the defeat an enemy named Max. There was also the time he was reassembled into a hoop so a dolphin enemy would be distracted and easily defeated.

Sure, Gangu was sometimes used for battle, and he was a good asset, but most of the time, he was a simple household appliance. In fact, he was originally supposed to be a toy… a simple toy with no use whatsoever.

Also, Gangu couldn't really fight. Whenever he was able to fight, it was ALL Bongo. He never did anything for himself. Without Bongo, he wouldn't have even been a simple household appliance.

Unbeknownst to him and everyone else, that would soon change today.

Our story takes place at a local Ramen shop. A small green animal that resembled a dog and a rabbit named Rui was busy washing the dishes while his best friend, White Bomber served Ramen to the customers.

White Bomber was an average white bomberman. He had a red ball sticking on the back of his head and similar balls as hands.

The girl who ran the restaurant with her father had light brown hair and wore a white T-shirt with a tank top. Her name was Shout.

It was an average day at the Ramen shop. There weren't too many customers and everyone performed his or her usual task. Of course, one thing was different. The pot Shout would often cook Ramen in was missing, so what did she cook with? You guessed it, Gangu!

Shout scooped some Ramen out of the robot's head as he barked, "Why am I the pot?"

Shout sighed and answered, "Because our usual pot is missing."

Gangu shook and retorted, "That doesn't answer my question! Why don't you just use a different pot?"

Shout thought about that and said, "I think it was because you had already been reassembled into a pot, so we decided to save time by using you."

Gangu let down a few tear drops as he started to steam. "Oh, the second batch is done," said Shout.

That's all Gangu was good for… household chores. Suddenly, Shout's badge began to blink as she said, "White Bomber, stop what you're doing right now! We have a mission!"

The Jetters all reported to an area with a big screen in it. A fat professor with thick glasses and spiky hair showed up on the screen. This professor, known as Dr. Iien gulped down a bowl of rice and barked, "Jetters, you have to hurry to Bone Planet! The Higehige Dan plans to steal the only wishbone of its kind!"

White Bomber's eyes widened as he repeated, "They plan to steal the only wishbone of its kind? We have to stop them! Life wouldn't be complete without wishbones!"

Bongo raised his hand and asked, "What's so unique about a wishbone, Bongo?"

Iien rubbed his head and replied, "It's the only wishbone that actually grants wishes!"

White Bomber gasped and barked, "WE HAVE TO RESCUE THAT WISHBONE RIGHT NOW! TO THE COSMO JETTER! WE HAVEN'T A MOMENT TO LOSE!"

Shout nodded and said, "Imagine what the Higehige Dan could do if all their wishes came true. They could wish for immortality!"

Gangu gasped and added, "Or even to have beautiful women enter their homes and bow down to their every whim! We have to stop them!"

White Bomber stared and asked, "What's the worst that could happen if they wished for that?"

Bongo spun around and asked, "What's the worst that could happen? WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN?" He them put on a girl wig along with a bikini and said, "Oh, Bagura-sama, you are so cute and manly! And Mujou, you are the ultimate love machine! How would you like us to join you in bed so we can do naughty thing together?"

White Bomber tried to imagine what that would be like. As he envisioned the though, he gasped and panicked, "WE HAVE TO STOP THEM NOW! TO THE COSMO JETTER!"

There was a long pause as Bongo stated, "You said that already, Bongo. I wanted to say it this time, Bongo."

After that incredibly pointless discussion, the Jetters climbed into a small yellow ship with two rockets sticking out of the side. This was the Cosmo Jetter.

After adjusting the settings, Shout flew the ship into space. Space was truly a beautiful thing, but we're not here to talk about that.

After about 5 hours of flying, the Jetters finally reached the bone planet. Upon landing, they noticed that the whole area was filled with bones. There were chicken bones, dog bones, monkey skulls and even skeletons… wait… SKELETONS?

White Bomber jumped when he saw one approaching them and shouted, "Get away from us, you evil Skeleton! I am White Bomber! I have 7 bomb stars and I will defeat you!"

With that, he did a dramatic pose, held up seven fingers and echoed, "Seven, seven, seven…"

Shout slapped her forehead and barked, "This is no time to show off! Besides, this skeleton isn't going to hurt us. He's one of the residents!"

Bongo gasped, shivered and uttered, "You mean this planet is invested with more of these things, Bongo?"

The small skeleton crossed his arm bones and remarked, "That is very rude! You shouldn't say such mean things about us Skeletons! We don't really walk around like zombies and try to kill people!"

Bongo, Gangu and White Bomber all wiped a bunch of sweat off of their foreheads as White Bomber said, "Gomen nasai, Mr. Skeleton!"

The skeleton blushed (Which is weird) and replied, "Mr. Skeleton? Oh, I wouldn't give myself that much authority! You can call me Mr. Skeleton if you want, but my real name is Paul."

Bongo and Gangu stared at each other, blinked and said in unison, "This guy's a nut job."

After the introductions were over, the Jetters were taken to the Skeleton tribe. Surprisingly, all the Skeletons looked as if they were normal people. The ones running the place were made from the bones of a human while the animals were made from the bones of other animals. (Sorry, I know this is too obvious)

Shout looked around at all the weirdness and noticed a big triangular arch in the middle of the village. She gasped and asked, "Is that the only wishbone of its kind in the universe that can grant wishes?"

Paul nodded and said, "That's our most prized possession. We are so glad you could come here! We got a memo telling us that the Higehige Dan was coming to steal it! We need that wishbone! You see, it's more than a wishbone to us! To us, it's our god! We worship it everyday! We bow down to it and polish it and keep the bird skeletons from pooping on it! Sadly, we don't do a very good job. There probably a million poop stains on it, but we can't see them because the bone just happened to be shinier and more white than all the other bones here! That's why we worship it!"

White Bomber cocked his head to one side and asked, "Does that mean that if a shinier bone came along, you'd worship it and throw this bone away?"

Paul nodded and Shout slapped her forehead. 'I think this thing should be stolen so they can't abuse it any longer,' she thought.

Suddenly, a small girl who was basically another skeleton with a ponytail ran up to Paul and said, "There's an ugly guy with a yellow beard and a cape here who wants to borrow our god."

Gangu gasped and replied, "That's the Higehige Dan!"

This was true. The ugly man was known as Mujou and his lackeys were the Higehige Dan. These strange were the same size as Bombermen, but they were different in appearance. They're bodies were always aquamarine and they had small white hands. Unlike the bombermen, they had fingers. They're feet were basically the same, but they're heads had two round balls instead of one.

Mujou let out an evil laugh and announced, "We finally found the village with the only wishbone of its kind! Now let's nab it before someone tries to stop us!"

Suddenly, Shout stepped in his way and exclaimed, "Someone is already here to stop you!"

Mujou cocked his head to one side and asked, "Oh, really? Who is it? I don't want to fight today." After suddenly realizing who had spoken to him, he gasped and stuttered, "S-Shout! That must mean the Jetters are with you!"

Gangu, Bongo and White Bomber stood in front as Gangu said, "Of course we're here. How did you not realize that? We've been standing here the whole time."

Mujou cried out in horror as he exclaimed, "It doesn't matter! You're still going to lose this fight! I have a brand new bomberman I want to try out, and if you don't leave, I'll have to sick him on you!"

There was a long silence as Mujou fumed at the head and shouted, "I mean it! Leave right now and you'll avoid having to face my bomberman!"

There was another dead silence as Mujou bit his cape and snapped, "Why aren't you running yet?"

Shout finally realized what was going on and asked, "Is your new bomberman taking a leak?"

Mujou slumped and answered, "The truth is that I don't really have a new bomberman. I was just trying to scare you into giving up."

There was another long silence as Shout said, "We're not leaving this spot, so you'd better just go back to where you came from."

Bongo nodded and said, "Without a bomberman, you can't actually beat us, Bongo."

Suddenly, a small dog skeleton ran up to White Bomber and started cuddling up to his leg.

Mujou noticed the small pup and exclaimed, "This is perfect! Higehige Dan, get me my combined Bomberman making machine!"

A few seconds later, Mujou was now seated to a giant laser. He pressed a red button on the chair that came with it as it fired a small beam at the dog. As the beam hit, the little pup vanished in a puff of pink smoke. As the smoke dispersed, a bomberman made entirely out of bones with a dog's head stood before them.

The bomberman turned to them and announced, "I am Dog Skeleton Bomber! With my chew toy and dog bone bombs, I will defeat you!"

Shout grimaced and said, "You're kidding, right?"

Gangu hung his head low and said, "That was SO not worth it."

Mujou let out another evil laugh and exclaimed, "Cower in fear before my Dog Skeleton Bomber!"

White Bomber hung his head low and said, "No, seriously, that is just pathetic. I've seen snails more threatening than that."

DSB stared in horror and said, "They are not terrified of my awesome boniness! That must means they're strong! What are we going to do?"

Mujou slapped his forehead and barked, "Make them change their tone!"

DSB nodded and pulled out a skull with a lit string on the top. He grinned and hurled the bomb at the Jetters as he shouted, "Bone Bomb, Bomber Shoot!"

White Bomber readied a bomb of his own to block the incoming skull, but sadly, it broke open into thirds, each third with a string attached to it. White Bomber was completely taken off-guard, so he wasn't able to throw his bomb in time to stop the skull from blowing up in this face. What made things worse was that the other two thirds had blown up in front of Shout and Bongo. Finally, the thing to ruin all chances, White Bomber's own bomb blew up in his hand.

White Bomber struggled to his feet and pulled out another bomb. "Why was Gangu the only one to be spared?" he asked.

Mujou laughed and answered, "Simply put, he's the only one here who's not a threat!"

Gangu shook and muttered, "I'm not a threat, eh?"

White Bomber's belt started to glow as a bomb appeared in his hand. It was soon covered with fire as White Bomber announced, "Burning Fire Bomb!"

After that, the kid hurled the bomb at DSB and shouted, "Bomber Shoot!"

The explosion left the skeleton lying in a heap. His bones were everywhere. White Bomber put his hands against his waste and said, "That's what you get for messing with White Bomber of the seven Bomb Stars!"

Sadly, his happiness came to an end as the dog skeleton's bones started to move and he manually repaired himself. He laughed maniacally and said, "It'll take more than a measly fire bomb to beat me!"

He suddenly pulled out a rubber bone with a string in it and announced, "Chew Toy Bomb! Bomber Shoot!"

He hurled the small chew toy at White Bomber as it exploded on impact and left the poor kid in a heap. There was no one to stop this menace now.

"What are you talking about?" snapped Gangu. "I'm still standing, aren't I?"

Yeah, but you suck.

"I'll show you who sucks!" retorted Gangu. Mujou stared and asked, "Who are you talking to?"

Gangu turned his gaze to him and gasped, "I forgot you were there! Anyway, I'm going to take you down! I may not be much, but luckily for me, I brought the appliances from Bongo's workshop that the big guy doesn't use on me!"

Suddenly, he reconstructed himself into… a sunlamp. Gangu trembled in fear as he shouted, "DAMN YOU, BONGO!"

Suddenly he remembered something. Without moister, bones would dry up in a second.

He pushed a little button that had just appeared on his forehead as the lamp part turned on and started sending a massive heat wave down the skeleton's body.

DBS screamed and exclaimed, "THIS IS REALLY BAD! IF I DRY UP, I'LL BE ROCK SOLID! I WON'T BE ABLE TO THROW CHEW TOYS ANYMORE!"

With that, the dog's entire body became so dry, he couldn't move. His bones had been fossilized.

Gangu blinked and uttered, "I did it…? I DID IT!"

Mujou cried in horror as he exclaimed, "Okay, you win! I'm leaving right now before you become a laser or something!"

He and the Higehige Dan all entered the ship together and flew off. Shout and the other finally came back to consciousness as Shout asked, "What happened to Mujou? Did he take the bone back with him?"

Paul showed up and asked, "What are you talking about? The bone's still here."

Everyone stared in surprise as Shout asked, "Did you actually stop them all by yourself, Gangu?"

Gangu nodded and Bongo embraced him and said, "I knew you'd make a name for yourself one day, Bongo!"

Gangu laughed triumphantly and exclaimed, "Now you must respect me! I demand a higher position in the Jetters!"

Shout thought about this and said, "Well, you certainly earned it, so why not?"

So, from this day forward, Gangu was now promoted from lovable pot to hard-working vacuum cleaner. 'This isn't what I had in mind.'