Nothing can breath, in the space
Colder than, the darkest sea
I have dreams about the days, driving through your sunset breeze
But the first thing I will do
Is bury my love for you
Listen to MOONDUST while reading:
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Time flies by fast when your an immortal. Before you know it in the blink of an eye all that you knew and loved is gone, just like wars that come out of the blue and are ended just as quickly. Yet one thing an immortal heart cannot stand is losing the other half of your soul and a part of you is jealous as that mortal coil in you longs for death to join them, but even if I we're to die I know we would not be with one another. My power in the force is so strong I would return as a force ghost walking all of known space alone.
At least being immortal I can see, feel, touch, and not only have select people see me. This is why I do not crave out my own heart to follow the man who left me for the reaper. Standing on Odessen I looked back at the overgrown base The Alliance had once used to plan attacks and change the tide of the war. Where my life had started over for me...For us.
Pale silver-blue eyes looked down at the Urn as a finger ran over the name on it, 'Theron Shan' the man that gave me a reason to fight, to change. Who made me happy and gave me a purpose to not give up. The man who gave me a family and raised them with me despite hardships and hurdles we faced as I took the mantle of Eternal Empress of Zakuul. While I never aged a day since my near close encounter with death he had. While he grew older and more frail I stuck beside him and held him as he took his final breaths and passed on into the force leaving me behind like everyone else had.
The people of Zakuul mourned for him, our children and their children mourned for his passing. The sun was high in the sky and bright when he left us as if the rays of light we're taking him up into the world above one we know nothing of, when the warm rays had left him his body had grown cold as did a piece of my own soul that left like it had died and left this world with him.
I still long to hear his voice, but I know I have only memories to remember it. As I moved to the old lifts I waved my hand causing the old terminal to begin lowering me into the depths of Odesson's jungles. The path we had once all walked was now grown over with vegetation. The wild life didn't disturb me as I walked like a ghost through the training grounds my Revanites had once used and where Valkorion and I fought. Where he made me realize I was weak and had to change my views or I would never defeat his children and how my little adventure had made Theron worry with how long I was gone.
As the moonlight illuminated the grove here, the waterfalls I looked up at the peak where we had held our Ceremony for our marriage. Standing up straight and using the force I jumped up onto the nearby wooden planks. My movements we're swift, yet graceful as I held onto the Urn not wanting to spill the contents when I finally reached the top I turned around to look at the waterfalls that we're in the distance giving the view a majestic look as rainbows could be seen under the full moon's light.
"You once told me you had a perfect chance to kill me when I was still a rising young Sith, but you didn't kill me...When we met to defeat Revan and the two destroying both Jedi and Sith orders I know you didn't trust me, but you gave me a chance and saw I wasn't like the other Sith. When we met again on that pirate world I know I shouldn't have had feelings for you as I was married to Quin, but when I learned you we're captured by the other forces and being tortured a part of me was afraid to lose you. I was more worried for your life then my own husband. I think that was the first time in my life I realized what it met to care for someone you knew you couldn't have, but wanted to protect." She pulled the Urn closer to her chest as she closed her eyes not caring nobody was listening, but a part of her felt like someone was with her.
"When I went to rescue you and I saw you manged to get free I felt like the rock sitting on my chest had been lifted, but I was angry to see Revan had harmed you. I wanted nothing more than to find him and defeat him then and their, but you stopped me from my going to my death and it was because of you I manged to do the impossible. Make Jedi and Sith cease fire so we could defeat the threat. Back then your mother sensed my attraction to you and I know if she had been given a chance she would have attempted to convert me to join the Jedi, but we know I was too wild to become a Jedi. The Battle on Yavin...I was happy to have you beside me. The support of everyone made me realize the Dark side was not the only important thing in my life. When we defeated Revan despite the Sith Emperor getting out I was just relieved it was over, but I knew we would have to part ways. Our task was done. The last night in camp while you we're giving your reports your mother revealed to me my past lineage. She had known my father; Hiroshi Rand and said I had his commanding presanse and his eyes. I did ask her if their was a chance of letting me keep you. She seemed surprised and caught off guard at my bold question and saw my uncertainty in my eyes. I didn't want to go back to fighting or one day you and I would have to kill one another.
That night I went to your tent and despite it being wrong I knew it was right...I laid with you and it felt good, it was right. I never wanted it to end, but in the end when the morning came we had to part ways. Our leaders had finished working things out and we would all leave the planet with friendly terms, but after life would return to normal. I didn't care if Quin saw I held you tight and kissed you passionately. I know it surprised even Darth Marr who I looked up to as the future for the Sith back then and a parental figure that I was never able to have in my life. When we left the system and we're well beyond one another's reach I felt like I had left something behind. No matter how much I used Quin to fill that void I wasn't able to hide my real feelings for you. I loved you and wanted to be with you, no matter how hard I looked for you and sliced around I couldn't track you down."
A sigh came to her lips as she looked back down at the Urn, "When The Eternal Fleet appeared and I rammed Darth Marr's ship into it. I thought to myself it was a pathetic way to die and that I wouldn't get my chance to see you. When the darkness consumed me I didn't think I would awaken again, but I did on board The Eternal Fleet. I knew I was most likely walking to my death, but that didn't happen. Instead I killed the man who had consumed a total planet and converted it to a wasteland in a matter of hours. Yet he jumped into my body to save himself, and as a result the over-whelming power knocked me out and I was locked in carbonite and slept for 5 years...My dreams we're originally about you and I...A world where we didn't have to fight anymore and we we're happy. When Lana freed me and we made it to Odessen I was relived to see you alive and well. You we're older, but you we're still the same man I knew and had deep feelings for. This time I didn't ignored my feelings and let you know how I felt and you showed me as well those same emotions. We both knew their was no separating. Where I went you went, be it beside me or telling me in my ear what to do to get back to you alive and safe.
I had 67 years of my life with you Theron, and never once we're they a dual moment. You always surprised me with tiny things or events. You we're a great man, a father, and a lover and even as you lay dying in my arms you asked me to not stop being the woman you fell in love with back on Rishi. Yet when you died you took a part of me with you to the other side. I know you always loved watching me under the moonlight when I did self training, or trained our children in the ways of the force. Tonight is when I bury our love in the moonlights dust and set our love free so that maybe if your soul is reborn you will one day return to me and we can at last die in one another arms and leave this world as one soul." She spoke warmly as a cool breeze blew past her ruffling the long robes she wore.
Raising the urn she pressed her lips to his name on the Urn and kissed it as a single tear rolled down her cheek. "Goodbye Theron Shan, may we meet in another life or in the force." She whispered as she raised her hand and opened the lid containing his ashes she had kept for 300 years. Moving to the ledge she turned the urn over letting the wind and waterfall carry his ashes away from her and off to spread over the planet where their second chance had been given to them.
'Until we meet again Samsara Sigma Shan...' A ghostly voice whispered behind her.
Turning around quickly she found nobody their but she felt a fading presence that washed over her with warmth that creased her face knocking the tear away as the wind blew past her. Looking up at the moonlight she had finally laid her loved one to rest at last she knew now she could move on to live as he wanted her to. "Thank you Theron..." She whispered as she bid him farewell for the last time.
The trip back to the ruins of the Alliance base was slow for her as she carried the empty urn. When she arrived back at the top she saw her Revanites and Zakuul guards waiting for the Eternal Empress of Zakuul to return to them. Her apprentice stood up as he saw his Master and moved to her. "Are you okay Empress Shan?" The young man asked.
"I'm better then I was apprentice. It has taken me a long time to say my final goodbye to the man I love, now I feel I can move on as he wanted me to." She smiled pressing her hand on the boys shoulder.
"I can sense the air around you is lighter now, does this mean my training is about to get a lot more serious?" He asked.
A thin smirk crossed her lips as she ruffled the boys hair. "When have I not been serious? You are the future of the Revanites and will one day protect the people of Zakuul when you have achieved your Knight rank." She said as she would move on board her personal ship. The Guards and other Revanites following close behind her.
When the ship was finished for prep they would take off leaving the planet behind and for Samsara Shan a chapter in her life that had been waiting to be closed. Yet a part of her couldn't help but hope she would find her soulmate again as she was forced to live yet it would just make the journey a little more exciting to see where her life took her and how she could make Zakuul all the more greater as a shining beacon of hope in the darkness of the Galaxy.
-FIN-