I thought that this chapter might surprise my readers. I hope that you like it! Please enjoy!
Lovesick Letter: Chapter one
Mikan didn't lose faith in writing her letters to her Grandpa. She couldn't just let him be by himself not knowing where she was or what she was doing. She never lost hope that maybe one of her letters would be sent to him. She just had to make one letter that will let him know that she is all right. She could show the letter to Mr. Narumi and let him know that the letter is safe to send out to Grandpa. She knew that it probably not work, but maybe, just maybe, that the letter would be sent just this once.
She wrote the letter before going to bed. And tucked herself in time for it to be just 8:30 that night. It wasn't that long of a letter. But she knew that she had to choose her words properly to make it seem that it wasn't that high profiled as a letter that any blabber mouth could just reveal to the outside world. And with that known, she dozed off to sleep.
The next morning, Mikan woke up. She had a good sleep that, she had to admit. She looked at her table to see if the letter that she left there was still in place. But as she looked with her early woken eyes, she saw nothing in sight that looked like the letter that she had worked so hard on for her Grandpa. She rubbed her eyes and checked again. I was really gone! "How could that be? I just left it here. Where could it have gone to?"
She looked everywhere for the letter. Under the bed, under the table, under the dresser, even inside her bathroom! But it was no where to be found. She looked around her room and thought where that letter could be. She looked around and around until her eyes fell on the window that stood open with the curtains swaying with the breeze. Her jaw dropped. "No! it can't be! Don't tell me that it went out the window! But I worked so hard! I wanted to give it to my own Grandpa. Not for someone else to read it for him! And my name was all over it!... wait… My name was all over it! Then maybe someone would bring it back to me."
The whole day Mikan wandered around school like there was some sort of ghost that went into her body and she didn't know it. She didn't know what to do. No one cam up to her to ask if she lost her letter or anything. She felt so lost. As the sun was still hot and the students were having their lunch, Mikan just sat there, under the trees looking up to the sky. She wondered if anyone has seen her letter yet. She stood up to go look for the letter.
Mikan looked everywhere. In the classrooms, the library, the nurses office, the laboratory, the schools canteen. But then she came across the school's barn. There sat Ruka and Natsume, who was as usual, the irritated look in his face never disappeared. As she turned to leave, she saw that Natsume had something in his hand, something pink, the same color of the letter that she had made for her Grandpa. But why would Natsume have her letter? She didn't know, but she wasn't going to sit around and watch him play around with her letter.
"Natsume! What are…" Mikan started as she ran up to him. She saw that the pink slip that he had in his hand was just a handkerchief that Surime probably gave him. Oh, what was she going to do? She didn't know where else to go, so she just dragged her feet all the way to class.
The sun was already setting. Mikan just stood there by her window staring out. She sighed. "I could not find my letter. I feel so stupid. That letter was gone ages ago…" She could feel the tears rushing up to her eyes now. She dropped on her knees, with her forehead against the wall. There was nothing else that she could do. She tried everything that she could. And she sat there crying herself to sleep.
When Miakn woke up the next morning, she knew that nothing could stop her from being happy the whole day today. She hated letting people on that she was sad. So she might as well be happy today. She washed her face and got dressed. Her eyes were a bit plump because of the crying that she did the night before, but it was ok. She was going to have a good day today and nothing was going to stop her.
As the students were gathering in class, making their usual routine with all their Alice's, she just sat there on her seat, watching Hotaru fix another invention of hers. " Hey Hotaru, can I ask you a question? Can you make something that can find something that I lost?" Mikan asked slowly.
Hotaru looked at her with her eyes to see what Mikan was thinking. Then looked away, "Depends. What did you lose?"
"Nothing in particular. Just a letter to my Grandpa. I wrote it for him on night and then when I woke the next morning, it was gone…" Mikan exclaimed waving her arms up and down." I wrote it with great effort… and I also put a picture of all of us in there so that he could see how I was doing. I don't want to worry him too much. The las time I tried to send him a letter, Mr. Narumi didn't approve remember? I just thought that this time if I let Mr. Narumi read the letter to see that I'm not saying anything bad about the school, then maybe he would send my letter. Even for just this once." Mikan felt her tears welling up in her eyes again. This time she couldn't stop them from falling. All of her classmates looked at her. She didn't mind them, waiting for Hotaru's answer.
"I don't know. You were to blame for losing your letter in the first place. Why should I help?" Hotaru said unflinching, still working on her invention. Mikan looked more depressed than ever. She ran out of the door only to bump into Mr. Narumi.
"Mikan, what's wrong? You seem depressed." Mr. Narumi looked concerned, holding Mikans arms with both hands.
Mikan pushed him away. "It's nothing. You wouldn't care anyway, would you! You never send any of my letters. And I still don't know how my Grandpa is doing. And I won't forgive myself if something is wrong with him." With that said Mikan ran down the hall.
'Nobody really cares do they? They know that this is something very important to me. They don't care!' Mikan thought as her hot tears fell down her cheeks. The pressure was drowning her. She couldn't take it.
"Do you understand now? That no one really cares about the students like you or me. They think that we are dangerous to the school and now that you are in. You cant get out. No matter what you do." The voice was stern and Mikan knew right away that it was someone that she knew she didn't want to talk to right now, Natsume.
"I don't care what you think Natsume. I will believe in what I believe. And you wont stop me. I just need to find my letter and then Mr. Na…" Mikan started
"You fool, even though you lost your letter, you still think that you can find it, when probably someone already found it." Natsume took out the pink slip of paper that he had in his pocket and held it next to his face.
"Don't tell me that you read it, did you?" Mikan looked startled. Then felt her face turn hot, feeling as if she were blushing.
"I don't know. I probably did or didn't. I'm not going to tell." Natsume turned to leave. He was heading to the park again.
Mikan followed him without saying a word. Her heart was beating so fast that she could swear that she could barley hear it thumping in her chest. What if Natsume read her letter? Then he would probably learn how she feels about him. Oh, God please no. Mikan thought. She would rather die than learn that Natsume knew how her feelings were towards him. This really sucks! Why is it that out of all of the people here in the school, and he gets to lay his hands on it! Natsume stopped short making Mikan bump into his back. He acted as if he didn't notice and sat down with his back leaning against a tree. Mikan just stood there looking down on him. "Could I possibly have my letter back? There is something I have to do with it." Mikan whispered under her breath.
"What? Like burn it to a thousand pieces? I could do that for you right now." Natsume held out his hand revealing the fire dancing on his palm.
"No! Nothing like that. I just want to show it to Mr. Narumi so he could bring it to my Grandpa." Mikan answered with her voice trembling. She didn't want something that she worked so hard for to be lost forever. She then sat next to Natsume, looking up at the suns rays that seeped through the trees leaves. "I would just be alright if I know that my Grandpa, the only family that I have left, is ok. Even if I'm not there to be with him." Mikan told Natsume this despite the fact that she didn't know if he was listening or not. "That's all I want to do right now. And if I cant do this, then I don't know what I'll do with myself." She then looked at Natsume, who was staring up at the angel rays as well. "I don't care." Natsume replied, breaking the slow music moment. "I just don't want people to be reading this garbage. The way you think about me. The way you think about the school. The way you even think! With that little head of yours. Your just an ordinary girl, with small thoughts as big as an ant. That's all."
Mikans face was all red now. Not because she was blushing or anything. This time she was angry at him. "Well than. If you hate that letter so much than why don't you just throw that letter away than? Instead of making me suffer here next to you because of the suspense! Its killing me! Just give me the letter already!" Mikan was already on her hands and knees, looking into the eyes of the boy that looked right back at her. It looked as if it didn't have any emotion. Those eyes that looked into hers blankly. And without saying a word, Natsume Kissed her right then and there. His eyes were shut, while pressing his soft lips against hers. Mikan was just so surprised that she just stared back at him as he did so. When that was over, she couldn't move. She just sat there staring at him. Her eyes were burning again. Her tears fell slowly. But Natsume just sat there looking at her, expressionless. Her hands traveled to her face, brushing her tears. "Why are you crying?" the question didn't really sound like a question, coming from Natsume. Mikan shook her head. "Nothing. Just nothing. There is nothing wrong." But her tears fell more and more. She turned her body so that her back was facing him, and she sat there. Quietly crying. And before she knew it, Natsume hugged her. But only for a moment. He let go and wandered off somewhere else. When Mikan opened her eyes, the letter that she wrote sat on her lap, unopened. She just sat there until it was sunset once again.